Thursday, June 29, 2006

   On second thought....

I went to an anime program today. There was about fifty people. Being surrounded by all those local anime fans reminded me of something my teacher said when she went to a comic book shop. She is in the manga section looking for a Battle Royale T-shirt and all the otaku were staring at her. She felt out of place and that all the otaku were connected somehow and that there was something that made them "the same" even though they look different. Now I know what she ment. I felt so out of place. Many of them even looked alike. A third of the girls had wavy hair that went past their shoulders and wore black T-shirts and jeans. It's not as severe at my school where one group wears the exact same color. We watched Saiyuki and I was pretty bored so I borrowed a magazine from a girl and started to read manga. Books on Medieval Europe are very boring.

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Tuesday, June 27, 2006

The cosmic egg of time and space

Wee. I was supposed to be productive today but I wasn't. June is nearly over but I've barely started on my homework. My sister was hogging the computer. I spent the weekend reading Lolita. It wasn't as good as it's hyped up to be. I don't like reading long books and this book didn't have to be this long. Many pages were very boring. About four pages were spent describing the cities Lo and Humbert visited and seven were spent describing Lo playing tennis. I wondered "How is this relevant ton the plot at all?" It was also annoying how Humbert used French phrases throughout the book and I didn't understand most of them. Many parts were funny though, especially near the beginning and the end. I don't see why the book is so controversial. It's not explicit or anything. It's PG-13. I want to see the movie but the reviews for both the 1962 and 1997 version aren’t that good. The ending made feel sympathy for the main character though. Lo was such a crude, manipulative, and rowdy character though. She seemed nothing like the amarori's and gosurori's you see at cons. I guess the 'Lolita' part of Gothic/Sweet Lolita only refers to youth and nothing else. I have no one to borrow anime from. I might have to actually start buying it. 0.0 I don't work though so I have no income. T.T My dad won't let me work or sell stuff anyway. He says that I don't need money My mom is teaching me to sew. I'm too impatient and inattentive to be good at this. I was just excited at the thought of being able to sew my own clothes instead of buying stuff on clearance at Wal-Mart. I don't know anything about fashion anyway. I wish that we wore uniforms to school. I wore uniforms from the time I was 2 years old until I finished middle school. I hate that people treat me differently because I don't dress like them. I know that uniforms wouldn't make us all 'equal'. In the seventh grade a kid was mean to me because my sneakers were “imitation addidas” to school. I, being ignorant about brand names and anything trendy, didn’t even know what addidas were. I bough the sneakers because I thought they looked nice. Still, uniforms would eliminate some of the teasing. People who oppose uniforms say that it constricts their individuality. The funny thing is that most people in my school dress alike depending on who their friends are. Even the people wearing the most outrageous clothes have at least five people who dress exactly like them. So, that’s all I have to say.

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Saturday, June 24, 2006

   Meh....my week

There was a lot of stuff that I wanted to write about but on the rare chances that I get to sit in front of the computer I don't feel like typing.I guess I'll make a skeleton. On Tuesday I watched the NBA finals with my dad. It was the first time that I'd actually watched an entire basketball game. Everyone in my large family was watching it at some point (not really to support the team but to support my dad). I think the main reason I watched it was to try to connect with my dad because we are like strangers. However my dad has always known that he was the only one in the house interested in sports and kind of dismissed us.It was kind of stressfull to watch and in basketball 6 minutes can last an eternity. We won and there was a lot of cheering. I went to bed around 1 a.m. T.T The next day my sister's 10 year old "friends" came over and made me play with them. I let them into my room only because they said that they'd help me clean it but they were no help at all. I ended up stuffing all of them into my keyboard case instead. I finally watched Howl's Moving Castle that day. It was such a good movie. ^.^ It's the only movie that I have ever seen that I could describe as "magical". The scene where Howl's hair turned orange was especially funny. Last Friday I watched Nausicaa which was much weirder (it was about bugs). I realized that I hate being judged. I don't even fit most of the stereotypes people give me. I should learn to stop being intimidated by people I barely know. However, I sometimes think that the want me to be intimidated or else they wouldn't say those things. Thinking about school made me very stressed. I can't stand it. I sometimes wish that I could take all my classes online so I wouldn't have to be surrounded by people my own age. Then, when I grow up I can be a hermit or something. I remembered my age again. I'm getting pretty old but in many ways I am still immature and unprepared for the real world. I get upset whenever I look at people who are younger than I am and are much more skilled than me and have accomplished more than I ever will. I get upset when I look at people my own age and I wonder if there is something wrong with me that prevents me from connecting with other people. There will be a Disney movie based on a book I read during the school year but the title is stupid. I don't think that the movie will be good. I could relate to the characters in the book but I can never do that with disney characters. They're not real. Suicide Club sounds like an interesting movie but I'll probably never see it because I have no tolerence for gore and violence. I must sleep now.

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Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Blather

I've been spending most of my time doing something to avoid the pile of summer homework that I need to do. Now I realize that it was stupid. Oh well. I have nothing much to say. Now I have to face reality again and go back to the way things were before. My typing speed is somewhere between 40 and 50 words per minute. That's not very impressive considering that I wanted to be over sixty. I guess it's my fault for not typing reguarly.

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Sunday, June 18, 2006

Oy...

Wow. I'm finally back after a pretty hectic week. I was spending a lot of time trying to find a new image editing program to download since my dad deleted the last one. Then, I was left stranded without internet for two days. After that I found out that I had downloaded a virus. I panicked for hours and looked for ways to get rid of it. I even deleted some of my own files because I was so scared. I called myself stupid, contemplating never using a computer again, and even vowed to switch to Linux. I eventually told my dad and he wasn't as mad as I thought he would be. I even got mad at my parents because they weren't willing to help. The instructions for deleting it were too complicated for me to understand (because I'm a computer n00b *nods*. After two days I eventually did it though (no thanks to my parents *glares*). *sigh* I know that no matter how many mistakes I make I will never learn for them. I will now continue looking for another image editor until I can get Photoshop.

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Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Sew simple

Yesterday I was having really bad chest pains. It freaked out at first because I thought I was having a heart attack. It hurt whenever I wasn't lying down. When my mom got home I told her about it. No matter how many times I told her that it was my chest that was hurting she would always ask, "Is your stomach still bothering you?" Today it's much better. My mom got mad at me because my room is so messy. Today I haven't cleaned my room nor have I started my summer homework. My mom is willing to teach me how to sew. I want to learn but I'm probably too impatient and I won't get any good.

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Sunday, June 11, 2006

   Kids these days are very scary

This Sunday isn't as bad as it usually is. I spent Friday and Saturday reading until my eyes were sore. I finally started reading that book to get my learner's permit and I finished All about Lily Chou-Chou. It was as long as a Bollywood movie and a lot more confusing. I should watch it again but I don't have the time nor patience.The music was pretty though. I always need to have themes explained to me.I guess it's my fault for not being able to think critically and look beyond the surface for the message. Maybe that's why I don't read poetry. Once you start understanding the message of the movie it's pretty scary though.

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Friday, June 9, 2006

   If only we could revive the Middle Ages

I volunteered at the library today and two other girls were there. I'm used to working alone. T.T I checked out a bunch of books on the Middle Ages but when I attempted to read them I became sleepy and couldn't concentrate. How am I going to write that essay if I can't stay awake? I spent the rest of the day reading a more interesting book that had nothing to do with schoolwork. My neighbor nearly broke my sisters neck today then said that my other sister should disappear. I'd slap her but then I'd get in trouble. I'm starting to feel that getting in trouble would be worth it.

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Thursday, June 8, 2006

It's not working

I want to watch Record of Lodoss War. I accidentally heard this song and fell in love with it. Now I have to watch the series. I want to watch SuperGals because of someone cosplaying as the main character at the convention. Have you ever decided to watch an anime for a weird reason? It's happened to me many times and I usually end up watching a series I wouldn't normally watch. For Example: Utena: I met the English voice actor of one of the characters at a convention. I went out and bought the series and now it’s one of my favorite anime. Marimite: I saw amvs about the series on a website Macross Plus: I was a little obsessed with Gabriella Robin songs and I heard music from the series by Yoko Kanno before I even watched it. Alichino: My mom wouldn’t let me wear this costume to a convention because she said it “Looked like a school uniform.” I decided to cosplay as a character from Alichino but I had to read the manga first. ^.^; I started doing the easy part of my summer homework. It turns out that it's not that "easy". Also, my rude and annoying neighbors were here again making my sisters feel stupid, calling them ugly, then eating all of our food. Report cards came today. I did pretty well. I was going to show my dad but the NBA finals are today and his team is playing so he is completely oblivious to everything else. I only did 15 service hours this year I still haven't signed up for that online health class. Even during the summer I can't completely forget about school.

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Wednesday, June 7, 2006

   Running astride an unmanned streetcar

Today is pretty dull. My mom wants me to edit all of her papers for her English class. I'm not even good at spelling, grammer and writing myself. I must clean the landfill I call my bedroom. I still have a problem with being too sensitive. Even if someone says something rude and forgets it the next day I'll remember it for years. I think that anyone who could honestly say that they don't care what ANYONE thinks such consider it a talent. I think I might start watching Naruto again, just to figure out who Gaara is. At the con I saw an AMV about Gaara and he seemed..interesting. It seems that the fangirls love him though. Does anyone know what episode he appears in?

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