Sunday, December 3, 2006

New Layout

I made a new layout but it's not that good. Oh well. I didn't spend much time on it. I think the layout fits me well. I like sweet and pretty things but my personality is rotten. I feel like breaking mirrors and making myself bleed. At the same time, I am boring and unimpressive like this layout. I have soooo much homework to do. Whenever I think about it, I have trouble breathing (seriously). I wish that I had a life outside of school. I hate my classes. I won't be getting any sleep tonight. I'm thinking about switching schools but that won't make things any better. No matter what school I go to I am unhappy.

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Saturday, December 2, 2006

Ew

My house is the dirtiest mess ever. The people in it are rotten too. I want to start sewing but I have homework to do. :( I've decided to make a website about me since I am so self centered.

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Friday, December 1, 2006

Do not want

Why am I so idle? I should be doing something productive. No wonder I dislke my life so much. It's December first. I really dislike Christmas. My family practically doesn't celebrate it. All we do is go to church at 12 a.m. on Christmas eve. No traditions, no decorations, on gift exchange, no special food, no nothing. We've never even had a tree. Next to Easter its the most boring holiday ever at my house.

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Thursday, November 30, 2006

sad

I hate this world. Why do I bother continuing to live in it?. No one cares I hate school I hate my family and today my teacher mocked my entire existance. NO ONE CARES THAT i FEEL LONELY AND UNNHAPPY ALL THE TIME. fORE REVENTGE i WANT TO JUST BLOW MYSELF UP AND BCOVER THEM WITH MY BLOOD. eVEN THEN, THEY WOULDN'T CARE. tHEY WOULD JUST FORGET ME. tHIS LIFE IS SHIT. tHERE IS NO REASON TO GO ON. yET i HAVEN'T ENEDED MY LIFE YET. vERY ABSURD. I AM SCREAMING INSIDE BUT NO ONE WILL LISTEN. I need drugs or something to get me away from this. Overdosing and dying would be exactly what I want.I want to kill them all. I can't be indifferent. I'll never be happy. I just want to take a gun and shoot myself so badly. The stupid idiots (aka my parents) are fighting again. The kids at school laught at kids who cut themselves but I feel like just taking a knife and slashing myself until I am coverd with blood. Even then. No one would care.

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006

   I'm shivering

Yesterday, my stalker expressed his desire to have sex with me. AM I THE ONLY ONE FREAKED OUT BY THIS? Anyway, I have too much school work to worry about it. *Is knocked unconscious by a huge pile of textbooks* I have tons of work to do, but I am here on this site instead of working on it. I hate two girls in my class. One, in my chemistry class, cheats on every test. I WORK MY BUTT OFF TO GET A "C+" IN THAT CLASS AND SHE JUSTS CHEATS ON EVERY TEST AND HAS AN "A". She needs to have her limbs chopped off with a blunt ax. Another girl is just perfect and makes me feel like a loser. She's prettier than me, gets better grades than me, has nicer and more expensive clothes than me, she is popular (unlike me, the school loser)and is overall happier than I am. She needs to be strangled with her own expensive brand name clothes. I hate life.

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Monday, November 27, 2006

Just shoot me

I want to be happy and carefree and I want to feel like I belong. However, I am a depressed loser who will die from too much schoolwork. Very pathetic. I need to die. Now.

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Sunday, November 26, 2006

Auspicious bloodletting barbers

I had a horrible weekend. My sister was the only one who had fun. My mom wouldn't even let me get the one thing I wanted.

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Wednesday, November 22, 2006

I'm calmer, but still unhappy

So I hate school and I really hate the people there. What can I do? I'm stuck for at least the end of this school year. I am stuck. I am counting down the days until this ends. My grades are slipping. I NEED TO RAISE MY GRADE IN CHEMISTRY!!!! I've done all my work in that class to the best of my ability and I still have a low grade. I need extra credit. *sigh* I have a test today that will just drop my grade again.

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Tuesday, November 21, 2006

OPTIMISM CAN KISS MY ASS

I FXXKING HATE ALL PEOPLE AT MY SCHOOL. THEY ARE THE MOST ROTTEN PEOPLE ON EARTH! I can't stand being around them. If they are not rotten scum, they are beautiful and perfect and make me feel like shit. This is part of the reason why I want to take online classes. This is part of the reason why I want to kill myself. I don't want to be around these "people". If I can't live alone, I'd rather be dead. I changed my mind. I am my blog.

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Saturday, November 18, 2006

I want to go home.

I want to go home. My dad was supposed to pick me up two hours ago. I hate homework. I need a job. My dad says that I don't need money. The next time he says that, I'll say, "I won't need money when you can give my $800 whenever I want."

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