Friday, August 3, 2007

   Contest. Stomach Pain. and Labor.
CONTEST- Lately i';ve been getting REALLY good entrys from people for my seven sins contest ^.^ !!! im so happy! am I getting anymore entries? or are people going to advertise? pelase check in and let me know. I'm ending my contest on the day school starts for me so that might be too hard... :/

Stomach pain- I've been getting bad bad bad stomach pains from all this worrying about tony. and i coughed up blood last night. I'm not sure whats happening..but im afraid its got something bad to do with the stomach. Official news will be tomnight, so let me know if you would like to know or not.

Labor- my stomach grows, but my wallet thins...therefore iNEED to goto the library and beg for some work to do today for a few dollars. i earned a fdew dollars a day or two ago..but DAMN MY SOFT HEART. I donated it to help an animal shelter from closing down. every dollar makes a diffrence....? lol. but im donating more if i can.

TONY- Stilla evil issue. we spent a day together and it was perfect. but then the topic of the girl came up...guys, im in love with him. but i hate what he wants to do. he' basically cheating on me. and i'm REALLY sick from worrying bout it. literally.

ART- Will....well..i dont like to ask. but will people check out my art? i feel that i'm getting alil rejected for the hard work done. and i ALWAYS vote on everyones pictures who comment on my site. or vote for me. so any takers?

BIRTHDAY- OMG. my birthdays soon. im not getting anything for it. thats all i know.everyones too broke. -cries-
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Wednesday, August 1, 2007

   Just When It might Get Better...
It went all downhill from there. Tony issues again. More serious, more tramatizing for me...More issues. More crying. More nerves, more throwing up, more worrying about the other girl, more screaming and being a baby having to get driven around at 3 am to help me fall asleep... I'm freaking out over here and he's saying its not a big thing.....I want us to be together with no other girls even in the picture.....

Things have fallen terribly downhill...I just can't take any more things like this! I've had it! I want him still and will be with him forever but the day he breaks my heart like he just did is the day i go insane!


Someone help me...Please someone help me...I hate this pain....I just need someone to talk to...I need to be alright......

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Monday, July 30, 2007

   I HAVE TO PEE!!!!
Um....well im writing this when i REALLY have to pee. I tend to do that with guestbook siugnings too...lol. ANYWAYS, theres a bunch i ned to update on.

TONY- it's all really complicated guys, but were together, and our future is still set and all...but a girlas in the way. Priestesspower444 is the only one who knows it all cuz shes me bff on here :D lol.

CONTEST- I need to know of the few who said theyre gonna join..if they actually are or not -.- cuz i dont wanna extend the contest at all, ive been getting a few very deep pictures of ppl who care bout it..which i love btw XD lol.

NEW ART?
i cant draw...its so sad...i need tony to be my muse...but im just still so scared :,(

AND MAYBE LAYOUT HELP?
what i would LOVE is buttons to a few other websites...a very nice dark purple and black design to go in the background...a scroll box..and mayne a few other things to get me goin on here. ANY HELP?

LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!

1.what is ur habit when you have to pee?!?!? [shaking ur legs jumping screaming?]
2.how good do you think meh contest is going so far?
3. what is ur DREAM wedding???
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Thursday, July 26, 2007

   OH GOD...
I just barely got back from the worst experience of my life...blood testing. They drew blood and i literally was so damn lose to passing out. Im deathly afraid of needles and it hurts people like me so bad...that, and i was forced to piss in a cup!!!!!!

TONY-
The moment that we have all been waiting for..wtf has been going on?? Well late last night i was crying and begging becauses we hung out yesterday and we kissed........He said he was too stressed out and theres too much pressure..which i can understand because high schools not easy for him...but then i asked what pressure there is of having a girlfriend.....and we called each other back and he asked me back out...so im ok for now ^.^ i just worry he';s gonna break up with me tomorrow..thats the pattern...so yeah. WOOO!

Um?
Contest...anyone doin it....erm...yeah. lol

ART-
I'm gonna start submitting all my art tonight. anyone gonna check it? im in western time and ill try to submit it before i goto the library...around 5 i tihnk.

all and all,
how are you guys?

Do you have any fears like me and my needles?
Do you have a bf/gf? describe em!
and new art? Im feeling giving if ppl return the favor -_- lol

^.^ LOVE YOU GUYS!
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Tuesday, July 24, 2007

   Not so good...
Im still having a really rough time with my fiance...I have to wait for him..So im going to...Its so hard. thank you to my very good friend kira whos been making me feel alittle bit better. I wish that he'd take me back so soon though...I imss him so bad.

DOCTORS.
Just got back from my worst fear of all..the hospital. Im under 2 much stress and nerves from him and all so yeah...blood work here i come...

CONTEST-
Only got 2 entrys so far i tihnk....is anyone else going to enter?? :,( i feel so unloved...gr... So yeah, anyone else entering?

And does anyone think i should still submit my art? dont see too much of a point in it anympore...then again..i dont see one in life.

Im just so lonely and getting really sick...

Love you guys!!!!!
How have u all been?
Tell me bout it! XD
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Saturday, July 21, 2007

   Dead.
I just lost my fiance.
The one man who meant the world to me. The light of my life for 3 years, is gone and no more. all because we 'lost' our love....But we have to stay in contact because of a child...
Its going to sting everytime I see him. Im so broken...I dont know what to do...

I justw ant to give up....

The worst part...i just barely finished painting a portrait of him holding the baby....
I feel so dead inside....I want to cry...Sleep away my troubles....

I dont want anything to do ith expression anymore.

Pleasse excuse the down on contest....and no more art entries from me...................

I just cant take it....

Art reminds me of him....


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