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Saturday, October 29, 2005
25 ways to annoy people on a plane (also kinda funny)
1. Push the flight attendant button, and when the attendant shows up, just stare at them coldly until they go away.
2. Open up the overhead compartments when people aren't looking, so their luggage falls.
3. Put up curtains around your seat, and claim that you are in first class and need extra attention.
4. If you're sitting next to a stranger, pretend to fall asleep on their shoulder. Drool profusely.
5. Curl up into a ball and tell people you're in your dark place (lol, Stuart).
6. Insist that everyone put the shades down over their windows so that you can see the in-flight movie better.
7. Steal a businessman's laptop, play pong on it.
8. Go to the back of the plane, and take the food that you want as if it's a buffet.
9. Scream at people to look out the window because you saw something, and then insist that you saw Superman flying by. Do NOT drop the subject.
10. Bring a parachute and then act mad when they don't let you jump out of the plane.
11. If you have the aisle seat, don't let people out to go to the bathroom.
12. Buy an extra seat for your favorite plushie, and then demand that they are served by the flight attendants too.
13. Sport a kamikaze helmet and goggles. Speak in a low voice into a hand held tape recorder: "Today's date, December 7th, 1941. I was not able to command my own personal plane but success shall still be ours...."
14. Take polaroids of everyone on the plane, and then arrange them in a photo album titled "My First Flight"
15. Lead a revolt against the first class passengers, claiming that you are the American rebels come to thwart the British plans of conquest.
16. Go up to the emergency exit and start poking it..
17. Go up to a small child sitting with their parents, and ask them if they want to join the mile-high club.
18. Bring a duffel bag packed with pipe cleaners, styrofoam balls, construction paper, etc. Organize a "Kraft Korner". Make a craft likeness of the person sitting next to you.
19. Point to someone and say they have a bomb. Laugh as they get tackled.
20. Bring a boom box, and play Frank Sinatra's "Come Fly With Me" for the whole flight.
21. Go up to the cockpit, and keep knocking until they open up. When they do, show them the "Junior pilot" plastic wings that they give to little kids, and tell them that they'd better live up to their promise and let you fly the plane.
22. Moon passing Delta planes.
23. Bounce up and down, screaming "turbulence!!!"
24. Snap down the food trays, take your neighbor's eating utensils, and rock out on your new "drums"
25. While someone's in the bathroom, knock on the door, while lighting a flaming bag of dog crap.
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