Tuesday, February 28, 2006

What Dreams May Come (Part 2)

Marker six. Still moving. Still thinking. Still dreading. The solitary white posts were placed just to the right side of the road. They stand errily illuminated in the pale light of the afternoon. The rain has finally let up into a light drizzle. It seems as though its following me. Never giving me a moments peace. Serving as a constant reminder of the past. Some say that rain is cleansing; as for me, all it does is cloud and pour. Marker seven. Up ahead I see a familiar sight. A sight I've never forgotten. The sight of a dead oak tree with hardly any leaves. I can still see the claw marks. God, they were beautiful hands. I could feel them running through my hair, they were so soft and delicate. I stop to shake off the memory as if it were clinging to the back of my head. Stop it. Leave me alone. I have to make it. I have to go. I walk on, leaving the tree behind me. It makes me sick to look at it. I wipe the rain from my face and there just up ahead, I see it. A pale white post. They're irritating to me now. Marker eight. I trudge along the path as I feel the whip of my boot lace against my ankle. I walk to the marker post and set my foot upon it to tie my boot. Then it hits me. A million thoughts of what could have been flood my mind. I'm helpless to stop them as they over-take me. I see love and warmth, happiness and mercy. I see a long, fulfilled life with no regrets, only fond heart-felt memories. Memories of friends and families. Good times and celebrations. Oh God, how I long for this. How I desire this conclusion. I awake from what seemed like hours, on my back. Rain and mud, cascading from my face and hands. I stare into the sky, mildly concious. I'm a mess. Filthy both inside and out. I slowly sit up and look around to get my barings only to see the marker post directly in front of me. Its clean, white presence fills me with anger. The rain begins to pour down. I climb to my feet and start up again. Just two more. Only two. Marker nine. I feel cold and empty. I want to turn around and go home. I have a fire place and hot tea. I could be there. I want to be there right now. Don't be a coward. I'm not yellow. Never have been and I certainly don't plan on starting. My steps are steady and defiant. I'll show you. Whatever. (to be continued)

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Monday, February 27, 2006

What Dreams May Come

Awash in the down-pour of a rainy afternoon, I walked to the place. Unsure of what I would find, or how I would feel when I got there, I continued. Uncertainty clouded my mind as I approached the first of ten markers along the path. These were a reminder known only to me. Arrested by the knowledge of why they were placed there, I struggled to keep them out of my field of vision. I walked on growing weary of fighting my fears for the past few years. I needed to make peace with the ghosts of the past. To put an end to what was the darkest period in my life. A time that I or my mind can't be released. At least not until I my sins are cleansed. Marker two. Damn, I hate these things. I find myself slowly remembering those days. There's nothing fond about them. What I did, who I was, and what I became as a result of my indescretions. Some people have quite a few skeletons in there closets. Mine is more like a graveyard. Too numerous to count, too many to mention. Marker three. My pace is steady. My breathing is normal. My mind is cluttered. Why must I replay those events over and over again? The ground is slick and wet, just like that day. It was raining then, too. A bit harder, though. My feet were soaked and there was so much rain. No traction. No grip. Why was I here? To commune with the past or was it to drive out its demons. I had to go. Whether I wanted to or not, I had to. Marker four. Drops cascade down my face as I move on. Eyes to the ground, never looking up. I don't like those damn things, not one bit. I swear, everytime I think its safe to look up, I see another marker. It's almost instinctive. It's like my mind knows they're coming and my eyes want to check. They have significants. For me, at least. Only for me. Marker five. Half way there. Man, I'm exhausted. I should've brought some food or even a little water. I had forgotten how long a walk this was. It was a lot shorter back then. Only twelve paces. That's all it took. I stop and tilt my head back. I open my mouth and hold out my arms as if to surrender to the storm. The water is refreshing to my tongue. It creeps down my chin and past my collar, onto my warm chest. The cold stings at first, but then the drop eveporates. I wish these thoughts would disappear; like that rain drop. Then again, this drop was pure. These thoughts and memories, not even close. They wash like tar. Scrubbing and scrubbing yet, I am covered in its inky, sticky, blackness. No escape, lest I use a harsher method. That's just up ahead. Five down, five to go. Damn, I hate those things. (to be continued)

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Thursday, February 23, 2006

Horse Shoes and Hand Grenades

Well, I'm back in tthe saddle again. My vacation was wonderful but like all things good, it had to come to an end. It's nice to be back amongst my Otaku brothers and sisters. I've been trying to visit all of your site since my return. It's been difficult because I'm also playing catch up at work. I think I'm okay now. (knocks on wood) I've decided to go with the Mech of the day. I thought about doing Mobile suits (Gundam) only, but there are a lot of really great mechs from other anime as well. For example the Arm Slaves from FMP, the Pat Labor machines, the Various array of mechs from the Robotech series, and so on. So, I'll be starting that in the next few days. Anyway, I'm off and running to another av/computer emergency. *raises fist* Peace to the natons of Otaku and Gundam. Out!

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Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Home, Sweet Home

Home at last. I'm pretty tired, seeing is how I've been in 7 states in 10 days. My body and mind are still on East Coast time. Here at home its 2pm, whereas my body thinks its 5pm. Ugh! I had one memorable trip to say the very least. I got to do and see so many things during my vacaton. From Jamestown, Virginia to New York, New York, I spanned our entire history from the first settlers of 1607 to modern day America 2006. Almost 400 years worth of history in just over a week. If any of you have the chance to do this kind of trip, you should. You will totally enjoy it! I'll be posting pics of things I saw and did through out the next couple o' weeks. Unfortunately, I couldn't take my camera into a few places because of security reasons. So the best I can do is describe them as best I can. Well I'll be back a little later to catch up on all the goings on here in The O. Thanks to all of you who wished me well in my travels. I really appreciate it! All's well, that ends well! It's great to be home.

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Saturday, February 18, 2006

Home Stretch Run.

Man, it's been a whirl-wind trip. I'm in Lancaster, PA right know, but I'm leaving for Philly and then New York City tomorrow! I can't wait for NYC because that's one place I've never been. But while I'm in Philly, I'll check out the Liberty Bell and Independence Hall, where our founding fathers signed the Declaration of Independence. After that, It's off to the Big Apple! Today we saw the very beautiful Amish country. I have some very dear friends that are Amish-Mennanite. They showed us around their farm and their sister's quilt shop. The amazing work that they do is... well, amazing. Yesterday we saw the Battlefield at Gettysburg. A very majestic and awe inspiring place. Earlier in the day we saw The Pentagon, and Arlington National Cemetary. Throughout the trip, I took some awesome photos. I'll post 'em when I download 'em off o' my camera. Anyway, next time you hear from me, I'll be in NYC. Then Monday, I'm homeward bound. Until then, I'll talk to you guys later!

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Thursday, February 16, 2006

   So Much To Do, So Little Time.

Well it was another busy day ,but, in a very fun way. The past couple o' days I was able to see the White House, All of the major memorials, The National Archives (The Constitution, The Bill of Rights, & The Declaration of Independance). We also made it to The Capitol and met with the California Congressman. We made it to the Library of Congress, The Bureau of Printing and Engraving and the very interesting Museum of American History. I'm pretty beat but tomorrow is going to be another travel day. Before we go, we're going to go to the Pentagon and then off to Mt. Vernon. From there we head to Lancaster, Pennsylvania for a day in Amish country. I'm sorry that I can't get to your sites as often as I'm used to doing. Bear with me as I fight an unceasing battle to find wireless signals at every hotel we stay in. I'll touch base with a post in another day or so. Until then, ciao!

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Tuesday, February 14, 2006

East Coast Roady!

The Grifter is alive and well and on vacation! I'm reporting from FallsChurch, Virginia, which is just a few miles outside of D.C. I've already been to Williamsburg and Jamestown, the first two seats of our government. I'll be in D.C. for the next few days. I start my day off tomorrow at the Whitehouse and hit the Mall from there. For those of you who don't know, the Mall is that long grassy area between the Capitol Hill and the Lincoln Memorial. It has the Smithsonian museums lining either side of the Mall. After that, I'm off to Capitol Hill to meet with Congressman Gallegly, Rep for California. Once finished with that, I head to union Station for a belated Valentines dinner with a very special lady! Who that is, you'll just have to guess. Although, some of you already know. Sorry for not posting 'til now. I was real sick on Friday and almost didn't get to go on my trip. But, as the Rolling Stones once said, "Wild horses couldn't drag me away". I was miserable on travel day. So much so that I barfed on the landing at Dallas Airport. (connector flight). I gotta say, it was a really rough landing and I've never ever been sick on a plane. Hey, can;t keep a good man down, right!? I gotta jet so I can get some sleep, so I'll post in another day or two. Catch yas later!

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Wednesday, February 8, 2006

New Things on the Horizon

How's everyone this day? I hope well. I've been busy lately preparing for my trip. Lots to do and 10 days worth o' stuff to pack. Luckily, being that I'm a guy, I pack very light and very well. One small suitcase, a backpack and my laptop bag. The less you carry, the less chance of it getting lost.*knocks on wood* I'll be gone for a bit, but I'll try to post from the road. I've been thinking about adding a new feature to my site called Mech o'The Day. It would feature a Mech of my choosing and then I would compile the stats. However, the stats might bore alot o' the females in the audience. Hell, the content might as well. Lord knows I love to keep the ladies happy and interested. ^_^ Not to mention my boys out there. Perhaps, then, you guys have better suggestions. The mech idea will probably happen but, I wanna know what other ideas you guys have up your creative sleeves. Please let me know. I've seen those, babe or hottie o' the day posts. Those are the ideas of the site author and I want to be somewhat original. At least with the content. Perhaps a survey. *shrug* Anyway, lemme know what you would like to see. Thanks. Out.

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Monday, February 6, 2006

"No Reply". (Food for thought.)

"Like the perfect ending, it wont't be too long. 'Til everything I've ruined has seemed to have gone. In time, I pray, you'll forgive. Now you know the man I am, can you forgive me?" "I fall and I think sometimes, like some broken ryhmes, I feel you're no longer there." "If only I could call the rain to melt and wash away the pain you feel, I would. You gave yourself to me and showed me what the truth could be for that I say, thank you. This was my life, it never made much sense to me." "If for every lie that I live, part of me would fade into this empty shell that I've become. Now I feel somehow, I no longer know myself, but I still know you." "I call and there's no reply, like some phantom cry that's too far away." "I close my eyes and watch as my life passes by, the only thing I see is you. For all the times you walked the line for me and stood here by my side, for that I say thank you. Here lies my life, it never felt that real to me." "You'll always be so much to me. But there's no reply. You'll never know how much you mean to me. Still, there's no reply." -The Seatbelts/Yoko Kano/Steve Conte They say it's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all. I say try it. You'll never know until you do. But, don't say I didn't warn you. Have you ever had someone great in your life, then you screwed it up somehow? Did you try to win them back or did you just move on?

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Friday, February 3, 2006

Quick Update

Hey all, what's crackin? I just submitted my first wallpaper design. I went with the mushy, lovey one. Don't worry, I'm not going soft. I've tried to get this one finished for a while now. I hope it gets accepted. The concept came to me when I was whaching InuYasha. I like the thing that Miroku and Sango have going on. Although, I wish she'd just tell him how she feels, and he keeps his mits off o' her long enough for her to say it. (Lecherous monk ^_^) So I went with a design that would depict that moment after they have both said their peace to one another. Miroku has turned away to reflect on the situation and Sango makes her move. I hope you guys like it. Well that's it for me. Have a great weekend, everyone. Late.

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