Monday, March 5, 2007

The suckiest poem of the century
My life is nothing
I am just a mass in the earth
Taking up space, another person could take
Im not something to which usefulness clings
I find myself putting some use into my life
Then i shake myself awake
Remambering that im a fake

I find myself living a lie
Something that is inot real
Or something that I can feel
The I ask myself
What was I put on this earth to do? Why?
Then something in my mind tells me
You have to make the best of it
You have to deal

I do my best
Then i start to cy
Then while i cry
I say no I cannot
Who am i fooling?
I know i cannot deal with the rest
Then i cry some more
wishing i could die

A thought comes to me;crying wont fix anything
What will it do byt bring more sadness I have to do something good for my life
In addition, make it cling
Before I end up with less and less

To all those people who were
And are on the way of making their a life a mess
You can turn it around as i did
What is it worth being dead?
Your family will cry
That above all is not worth it
In addition, who cares about other people?
There is no person on earth who will thing
At least we are one person less
TEll people befor their living is rid
because then you have done as your own conciounce bid.




k guys i know this poem sucks big time but all i could come up with a moments notice.
will put another one up tomorrow
and will try to put more thought into it
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   school and idiot friends
Hey guys
sorry no poem. Decided against it. it sucks too much. but will put it up after this i promise. anysways not much going on at school. well except UGH 9 weeks exams.
Yet another reason for teacher's to torture us. well then again they never needed a reason. -_-
um...helping a lot of my friends with homework at school so i don't get a lot of alone time. though i don't mind that much.
i have been having a problem with my bf, best fried, not best friend forever or my boyfriend (EWEE) anysway's. He is way to shy for his own good. see i saw him in a wheel chair the other day. and i worry about my friends a lot because i care. and i didn't see him for two days so i didn't know if he had died. then he come's to school on monday and i kill him because i was worried, as i worry about all my friends. anyway's then i try to get him to give me his phone number so at least then i don't have to worry a lot. but then he decides to get all bashfull. i mean we have been putting up with stuff about how a guy and a girl can't be just friends all year i mean ALL year. and now he get's bashful just because i want to know he isn't dead once in a while. and so then i just ended up giving him mine so that he can let me know if there's an emergency or something.
i swear it guys are complete and total BAKAS. IDGITS. AND FREAKING IDIOTS.
whatever
i just didn't get it i guess i was the one missing something.
ill probably die by the end of this week. 9 weeks remember and i haven't even cracked open a text book once. i am so going to fail.
anyway gtg
talk to you guys later.
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Saturday, March 3, 2007

   hey
Hey guys i feel a lot better today. I am not over it but i don't feel as sad anymore. yesterday i felt sucky very very very sucky. well will post a poem later
ttyl
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Friday, March 2, 2007

   *SOB*
*Sob* I am crying so hard right now. He died. My friends dad died. And after me and her hoped so much that he wouldn't. She and me were crying. I don *sniffle* really feel like typing about it. *SOB*
TTYL
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Thursday, March 1, 2007

   MY DAY TODAY
GUYS ARE COMPLETE AND TOTAL IDGITS!!! THEY ARE WAY WAY TO STUBORN AND DON'T KNOW WHEN TO QUIT.
GRRRRRRRR!!! SO MAD RIGHT NOW
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Friday, February 23, 2007

Painful (my life)
Guys i feel like crying right now. Never mind i am crying. remember when i told you guys i lived off the happiness and pain of others. Well my friends father is in a coma. and she told me this morning. He has been in a coma since sunday. Me and her were crying this morning. I get really sad thinking that this is happening to my friend. I keep thinking if this was happening to me i would die. I hate to think that my friend won't ever be the same again and smile in the silly way she used to. I keep crying thinking about it. *sobbing*
sorry guys don't really feel up to a perky ending.
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Ranting
How is it possible two opposing feelings or forces can be brought on by looking at the same object. Take fire for example. Fire can be seen as a force that can only be used for destruction or it could be a force that brings warmth through the chilly cold. Such as the fire of desire that burns within each of us or the flicker of fire on a candle that represents a tingle of hope. Or we could take a person view the person as painfully shy and downfalled while another may view him or her as a "fire" that burns with great power. Though the strangest thing is taht both of these opposing forces are both present in the same person. This only goes to show us that there is always more than one way to look at something. Though it only shows up when another puts in the effort to look ofr it. If people didnt try then all hopes for happiness for that person not to mention the world would disapear wouldnt it???
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Monday, February 19, 2007

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   Torturing friends for fun ( my day at school)
GOD!!! I AM SO MAD!!! What kind of sad world do we live in now. It's sick the way friends get a sick enjoyment when torturing other friends. It sucks even more when that friend can't help what he's being tortured about. See my friend eric admitted friday that he had claustrophobia. Then my twwo other friends named Blake and Wesley started putting boxes around him with their arms. Torturing him. The thing is he was their friend too!! Then the worst part is he tried to play it off like it was no big deal but you could so totally tell than he was scared. Then when i wasn't there to scream at them to stop they did it again in a small stair well and he screamed really loud. and they started laughing about it. today i thought they would feel a little guilty about it but noooo they say they don't care. GOD they can be such idiots. What if he had fainted or got a heart attack or something. when i said this to them they said that it would be even funnier if he did. GOD THEY CAN BE SUCH JERKS i mean he couldn't even help what they were torturing him about.
i guess i blew off a little steam. ttyl
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Monday, February 12, 2007

   confused
Ok
i just got in trouble with my dad and i don't know what for
See there was this accident and it involved my sister apparently i was listening to my i pod and my sister's hand got slammed in the door. Then my dad starts yelling at me about how i listen to my ipod too much and how i ll be dead if he catches me with it in my ears ever again. See the thing is that I am an anxious person and i mean that as much as possible. Even a loud noise gets me nervous. SO i have to blow this nervousness on something. He got mad at me when i tried it on food, books, video games and now music. I mean i have to do something and i am guessing he doesn't want me taking it out on myself or someone else. If i don't ill become a jittering ball of nervousness in no time.
*sigh* life is so confusing
Look at me i sound like a baby.
well gotta go
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