Tuesday, June 6, 2006

6/6/06, the worst day of my life.....
My internet is still busted, I didn't sleep all night, I woke up a 5:35 AM and now I am in total existential despair...

Manic depression has worked it's way back into my already crippled life, this year has been nothing but torment and unhappiness. From deaths of friends and family to the horrific experience of the week I mentionned in my previous post. I just recieved a devastating e-mail from someone I won't name for their sake and my life has gone from bad to a downward spiral into misery.

It shan't take you long to figure out why I'm unhappy, oh well, what's worse is that I'm gonna be expected to speak to no one about this(no one other than my therapist, of course) and be all bright and cheery around others...

Me and my big friggin' mouth and bloody people insisting on knowing everything. I knew my emotions would one day totally ruin my life, and they have.

So I've lost a father, friends and a love all in sixth months....
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Monday, May 29, 2006

One Hell of a weekend!
Sorry I was unable to post on Saturday or Sunday, I was too stressed/out of my element to post Saturday and mein Int@rw3bz are down at home(need to hack the modem!) so I'm using a public computer for this post, I'll also note that the period key is totally trashed on this so I'll edit the slack grammar later(end)

Friday night was pretty Hellish, bad music, expensive drinks, whiplash and a lack of fun in general ruined it(end) I got home at around midnight and was totally exhausted/depressed, my mother blames all my upset on Michelle and rambled about how she's far from being worth my love and affection, I think oppostie(end)

Saturday morning I fetched Tubby Bitch from his woodsy abode(fresh from arguing with Rob) and dragged him to The Da Vinci Code(fabulous adaption of a great novel, he loved it) and we bought ramen and hair dye(end) At about 8 PM Michelle popped up and we dyed Jay's hair a luxurious red(Rob will think he's such the faggot for this*uncomfortable chuckle*)(end) She stuck around 'til about ten, when my mother caught wind of her presence and became totally livid, so I was left(with Fatty's assistance) to walk her home(end)

When we made it to her sister's house, I hit the concrete in a fetal ball and sobbed for around half an hour(end) Jay and Michelle soon noticed I was REALLY far beyond calm and talked me down for around two hours(end) We sat on the deck 'til 12:05 AM embracing and speaking at lengths about our feelings(which caused Jay to pull some "interesting" faces) and despite the fact I thought this would collectively ruin our relationships, it brought us all closer together(end) With a friend like Jay and a beautiful woman like Michelle, I can safely say my life has regained it's luster(end)

Sunday was uneventful, listen to mother rant about her disapproval of Michelle(said that she looks like a lesbian), watch Jay freak out at the TV while playing videogames, drive around aimlessly, have Russ fix my laptop, watch Macross with Russ, have Russ reboot my modem(which fucked up my desktop's internet connection) and now this week I've gotta hack the security lock on my router and re-open all connections, which will liekly take hours since I am "hardware-illiterate"(end)

Well, a lot happened and I can safely say that all involved(and my therapist) will never forget this weekend, now I'm off to find my appointment card(for the therapist, unsurprsingly) and fix me damn int@w3bz, hope you'd had a great weekend as well(end)
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Thursday, May 25, 2006

Survived another Thursday!
It was another typical Thursday, endure other's odd behaviour, go to therapist, eat shoddy microwave dinner, talk on phone, get sick(DAMN YOU MICHELLE AND YOUR FUCKING COLDS AND LATCHY "COMFORT ME.."-NESS!!!) and find some time to waste before tomorrow.

Well, I've totally run out of things to say, I'll post again on Saturday, something tells that a night out with Michelle will leave me too trashed/exhausted/pre-occupied to give time to a competent post AND sleep.
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Wednesday, May 24, 2006

I've decided....
...to not talk about my miserable trip to NY,it was that bad and I don't want to bore/annoy others with my complaints, instead I'll rant about my weekend.

Friday I'm being dragged(emphasis on "dragged") to a party by Michelle, so that'll be three hours of cheap drinks, rave music and awkward silence. Plus she'll likely crash at my damn house...AGAIN!(Not that it would really bother me, Jay's not heading into town 'til Saturday so that would give us the night alone....*devilish laugh*) Then Saturday I've gotta wake up, wash the smell of raver off me and rouse Jay from his psychoactive induced Friday night coma and deal with him for a day and a half(which shan't be hard as long as Friday goes well and Michelle isn't around when he arrives, Jay kils all the fun we have...) then spend Sunday evening passed out on the couch covered in Fritos and ramen.

Another average weekend from the looks of it, but this may be better than expected...but I've still got Thursday and Friday morning to struggle through until then.
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Monday, May 22, 2006

Back, goddammit!!!
AND I SO FREAKIN' TIRED!!!!
Intelligent post tomorrow, I need some sleep.
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Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Sick!!!!
The trip is so close(I'm sure you've noticed my general amount of excitement about the trip) and I ahd to go and get sick. This headache is totally killing me.....

Anyways, I've purchased 7 and read 8 books in the past three weeks. By ritual I usually buy a book a week, but then I started buying as many as four books and I borrowed Mitchell's copy of the DaVinci Code, plus I have a list of around 15 books to buy when in NY.

Another another trip related note, a serious thorn in my side(buying prezzies for mates an' such) has been pulled out. Michelle was kind(!) enough to put up thirty bucks(!!) towards her gifts and she's also finally made up her mind as to what she wants. I can't wait to see the look on the clerk's face when a scraggly man of approximately six feet in height, thin as a rod and clad in chains and black buys a pair of size 5 red Chuck Taylors(Any money says their face darts directly to my feet, which are size 13s).

Anyways, I'm gonna rest this headache off and pack for Thursday(I leave at SIX IN THE FUCKIN' MORN!!!!), I'll post again after the trip.
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Saturday, May 13, 2006

   Saturday...
The festivities last night more or less went horrifically awry. Jay was grumbly and tired for the first three hours and we all ended up passing out at 12:25, which was a total pitance compared to previous shindings. But it was fun while it lasted.

The stocking up on foods and such merely cost us around $23 for everything, and my order at the fucking bookstore finally came in. Most of the night was squandered on either A)Ranma 1/2 fansubs(Complete with over-analytical conversations about the semantics of the series!), B)Heated games of multiplayer deathmatch in Red Faction 2(No one can beat "Radical Edward"!!!!), C)Jay engrossing himself in a round or fifteen of Star Wars: Battlefront whilst I watched from underneath Michelle(I'M NOT FUCKING FURNITURE, GIRL!!!) or D)Everyone struggling to endure the horrid torture that is attempting to have three people sleep in the backseat of a van while an on-board DVD player blared Aqua Teen Hunger Force(Never again!!!)

I woke up from this nightmare at about 5:54 AM and if the 19 or 20 nightmares I had tell me anything, they tell me that I neglected to ask Michelle for that fucking kiss. But seeing as Jay "Fat lecher" Willis was present and accounted for every waking second of the night, it would not have turned out well. Oh, that and my cousin Bill called out-of-the-blue to announce he's moving into one of the older houses down the street(Joy!) but someone(Cough!Mom!Cough!) told him about Michelle which prompted him to say "Ya takin' her out anywheres t'night"(in his crazy Scotsman/Ontario yuppie lilt), my response being "Possibly..." to which he felt free to say "Remember, it doesn't matter where ya take 'er or what ya do, just don't forget ta feel 'er up, 'kay?".

So it's official, I've no ability to sleep, I can waste hours on trivial things, and my family wants to totally ruin all of my chances at remaining on Michelle's good side.

Anyways, better stop ranting before I go nuts...only four days 'til I leave Sydney and embark on a glorious trip to NYC. Maybe people will shut up by then, take care.
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Thursday, May 11, 2006

Not long before my trip!
Tomorrow is going to be absolutely excellent!
I've got guests(as usual) and we're throwing a little "going-on-vacation" party for me! I've gotta stock up on drinks and food for about four people(three are in attendance, but it doesn't hurt to have extras prepped!) and I can cetainly say I'm vastly excited!!!

Here's how the day pans out...
6:30 AM: Wake up, shower, dress, trangle to work.
8:45 AM-11:45 AM: Work like a dog.
12:00 PM: Take Michelle to lunch, remember actually buy food for self.
1:00 PM-3:25 PM: Work like a dog.
3:45 PM: Be dragged back home by Michelle
4:00 PM: Get Jay's worthless ass into town.
5:00 PM: Rush to store for food.
6:00 PM-6:00 AM: Party like Hell.
10:00 AM: Wake up, kick out guests.
11:00 AM: Prep for aunt's graduation(It took her twenty years to get her degree in psychology).
3:00 PM: Get back from grad ceremony, pass out and sleep 'til Sunday.

As you can see, it's planned to the minute and ANY neglected details will result in disaster. Oh, and I must remind Michelle about that kiss she promised me(evil snickering), off to sleep in preparation. Will post after the fun and disorientation.
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Tuesday, May 9, 2006

   Tuesday...
Another day scratched off the calendar, same old same old...

Work, prattle with/buy lunch/tend to the every whim of Michelle, have important techno-whatever get broken(today it was my MP3 player), get home, reassure therapist I'm not totally insane, call Jay and get on the internet.

But I can rest easy, I've got the day off tomorrow, the manga I ordered from the bookstore comes in, I'll likely say "fuck all" to cooking and head out for a meal and STILL have to finish my delayed weekly comic(late three weeks in a row!), plus Mitchell returns from his infernal trip to the Capital with prezzies for all(He called me out of the blue from a payphone at a mall about three days ago and says "I've got thirty bucks to waste, want something?" to which I promptly asked for either new reading material or something Samurai Champloo related.) and he will not go unnappreciated.

Then Friday is my last weekend a'fore my epic trek from Sydney to Halifax to Newark to NYC and back in a mere six days, it'll be worth every second of the sightseeing and shopping. I'll likely have plenty to blather about when I return and hey, if the VAIO Michelle broke is fixed by Wednesday, it'll be coming to the Sattes with me.

Now I'm off to play bass and draw, g'byes.
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Saturday, May 6, 2006

Another Saturday!
Today was a good relaxer day for me, I need all the resty I can get because I've still got a laborious week and a half until my trip, but more on that later.

I spent today watching anime with my childhood friend Jay for about five or so hours, we cut through a huge chunk of Cowboy Bebop, the end of FMA and even got in some Ranma 1/2 before he left after coming down with a crippling headache.

To top the anime watching off, I'm gonna watch some old VHS copies of various OVAs and finish off with Cowboy Bebop: Knockin' On Heaven's Door(my sixth viewing, for the record.) and Blood: The Last Vampire.

I'll about some more anime-realted whatever t'morrow, see y'all later.
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