Saturday, October 9, 2004

   thus marks the end of my social life

MAIN:

well the project has started. and i must say, they really make it sound a lot worse than it really is ^^; and all the teachers have different views over what is the hardest job and what is the easiest... x_X but i'm feeling quite optomistic about it at the moment... have to wait and see tho, only the first day of 6 weeks... heh... i'm still going to loses anything of a social life that i'm clinging to x_X

as i've mentioned time and time again, bus rides are always funny. first i'll start with what was outside of the bus. today we (or maybe just me because no one else pays attention ^^;) saw a firetruck that went to the other side of the road and almost had a head on collision with some car! then we saw another firetruck going in the oppisite direction... and a few minutes later we saw yet another fire truck going in some other driection! must be a lot of fires...

anyway here's what happened on the bus. this guy who is in my class was talking to a girl who always smiles... and said "don't you ever get mad?" and she said that she did sometimes. "get mad" he said. and she smiled and said "i'm mad at you" very sweetly. so now it's a big joke. and this guy has decided that i don't get mad either ^^; then we started talking more about naruto and stuff and since he is fluent in japanese he is taking the class that the seniors take... and he said it's like going back to 3rd grade! lol. everyone thinks he likes this girl in our class... it's kind of funny because he blushes a lot when we start asking him who he likes. he claims to like someone from my old school but we still think it's that girl in our class...

that guy said he doesn't picture me getting mad... ever o_O;; i wonder if he ever pictures me sad... i hope not... i don't really show emotions that often... so crying would be kind of a weird thing for me. i've cried once or twice in the past year but nothing much, usually just a tear or two. and each time it was just because my friend was so close to comitting suicide and i couldn't do anything for him... but that's different... i can't explain why right now but it's just different... other than that i don't cry. ever. (well at least hopefully not ever...)

today in japanese we played a game since we just finished learning the hiragana alphabet. the game is that there are cards with pictures on them and a hiragana letter in the corner and someone reads a letter and the first person to grab the right card gets the card. the person with the most cards wins. so the first game was ok, but after that people nearly killed each other to get the cards! o_o;; seriously, i think i hurt my wrist playing that game x_x;; but it was well worth it because i won so i got extra credit ^^

i have to take the PSAT's soon... i'm really nervous even though i'm a freshman... freshman and sophmore year tests don't count for anything, it's the junior year that matters... the stuff seems kind of simple but i think i need to work on my vocabulary... but as long as it doesn't matter this year maybe i won't stress out about it so much...

that's about all i have to say as far as school goes...

remember a while ago when i said that i drew a picture of mana? i'm not sure if i mentioned this before but i drew a picture of ryutaro too... and it wasn't bad for a second realistic pic i guess... i'm having trouble with art in general though... starting a picture takes me a LONG time. (except that one picture of an-cafe... ^^) i guess it's just a block and hopefully it will go away soon! (but that still doesn't keep me from the oekaki boards! lol) one day i'll be able to scan more of my pictures, but i have to wait until i get a scanner compatible with the new computer system (we upgraded my mom's mac and now the scanner doesn't work with it x_X) oekaki is so relaxing... just like myOtaku! i've only just started to actually post, half the time i never bother to try finishing it ^^; but it's fun anyway... i go to Hybrid Genesis if anyone is interested in viewing the few things i do (under the name of soujiro) or maybe submitting pictures there.

i've been looking at my past posts and i realized that i've been writing A LOT on myOtaku. i write more here than on xanga or deviantART combined! I really hope i don't bore you. if i do, i'm very sorry! but it really does help relieve stress... lots and lots and lots of stress ^^; i don't know what i would do without myOtaku. it started out just so that i could track greetings, and then i slowly (very slowly =_='') gained friends here and now it's one of my favorite websites! i really love it here ^^

and on that note i would like to thank everyone for the 624 hits that i have had on my site! i'm ranked at 567 now, and i never really payed attention to it but i noticed today that i'm very close to 500! ^^ well thanks everyone... it means a lot to me!

i also noticed how much i talk about my friend ^^'' wow i REALLY hope i don't bore you with that... so many posts about him... heh... but if i don't say something it makes it a lot harder on me, especially when he gets suicidal and depressed and that stuff... however... i think i've accepted the fact that we can't be together and that he loves someone else. and even though it doesn't make me the happiest person in the world, i can live with that. at least we can still be friends... and i can still love him... just more as a friend instead of romantically... and anyway, like i said, i don't have time for it... i was trying to fall asleep when i realized that probably i'm really better off without love and relationships and that type of thing... because i should be concentrating on other things right now... school, for instance. x_X

wow this post was VERY LONG!! again, if you made it down to here without falling asleep, thanks!! you're very patient ^^; *sigh* it's finally the weekend!!! *falls down dead*

COMMENT RESPONSE (moved back to the bottom because i have trouble making up my mind):

Nikorasu: there are so many depressed/suicidal teens on dA... especially in the forums... x_x

Destinyssweetman: o_o;; your bus has THAT MANY PEOPLE? we have so few people that you can sit one to a seat and STILL have lots of space left over...

Kei-chan: the last day of school? wow, even i would never think it was the last day of school only a few months into the year... ^^;

The God of Death: wow, i never knew it was a fact... but i definitely believe it lol

DemonMessiah: yeah i agree with both of you... sometimes it's tempting but i don't see how anyone could actually go through with it...

Haruno Sakura: suicide is very selfish... life is... interesting sometimes, but i agree that it's worth living... ^^;

raijin-sama: our bus makes EVERYTHING interesting... o_O;;

ninjamonkey: you don't know what naruto is?? you're missing a LOT! i'll try to explain it but i won't be very good at it... Naruto is a boy who has a fox demon sealed within his body and for that the entire village looks down on him. but he wants to be the best ninja in the world so that he can prove everyone wrong. he trains with sakura (who he likes) and sasuke (who sakura likes, and who hates naruto) and it's basically about what happens to them... (told you i'm bad at summaries... x_X)

dark moon fox: aww thanks but i still feel inferior x_X haha. because that guy said the senior class is like going back to 3rd grade.. x_X so what would the freshman class be to him??

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