Monday, May 10, 2004

   last or second last post...
Gary let me take over and play drumset this morn to give me a chance to prove myself to all the people who havent heard me yet. At practice, Bobby and the piano player were screaming at me for various reasons. And everything they were screaming at me for, were things that Gary had told me to do! He had told me exactly what the tempo should be etc etc seeming as how i had never played those songs before with that group of people in my life. So yeah... Got screamed at which pissed me off and pulled down my self-estem {which isnt much anyway}. A few min before we started, Gary was giving me a few last minute tips and so i ended up changing one of the songs to play it like he said, which screwed up how i ended up thinking about it, which then made me miss my intro to the next song. So then afterwards i got screamed at AGAIN becuase i missed the intro and the piano was pissed that she had to lead the band in... damn them all. That and Bobby was no help what-so-ever. I had asked him to help me with the intro and he did nothing... he just sat there and looked at me like... "....*drool*..." The second we were done i practically ran off-stage. When i got backstage i pretty much ran for the door but Gary grabbed my arm and pulled me back.. He knew i messed up and knew i was about to break. He just kinda stood there and hugged me. He's my comfort. He knows how i am about stuff. I'm a perfectionist and he knows it too... Thats why stuff like that screws with my mind so much. He's a perfectionist too so we understand each other. But yeah. He grabbed my arm and just pulled me into a big hug cause he knew i was breaking down inside... I was. After that he just sat backstage with me and kept the others from messing with me to much... I think he must have screamed at Bobby cause Bobby kept a distance from me and Gary both. Angie, one of the vocals, came over and gave me a hug. She tried cheering me up by saying, "I turned around and was like WOW! I thought it was Gary playing. I had forgotten you were playing those songs!" and Gary was like, "See! i told you it sounded fine!" The guitar and keyboard players both told me that it sounded really good. Though, i know they were just saying that... As far as i'm concerned, Gary can keep his drumset. I quit... This will possibly be the last time i ever post. As for the job thing with my dad... well... He took the job in Indiana. He starts on the 17th.. i have till the 27th.. the end of school... after that, we pack up and leave..so...there you have it... i MIGHT put another post up sometime... have acouple other places to go post last notices.. dont know why i bother. no one will notice if i just sorta dissappear right? well... bye...

~Hatsuharu
BKA
~The Everlasting Shinimegami
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