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myOtaku.com: Haze


Tuesday, November 18, 2003


Hi all. *waves* I hope you all are better than I am. Today was bad. Why? Let's see. . . .I found out that one of my best friends is now dating a girl that I hate. So now I can't go anywhere near him because she is always there, cept in our 1 class that we have together. It's horrible! Why would he like her? She is ugly, completely fake, a liar, and did I mention fake? Bah! It makes me so mad just thinking about it. I just know that she will completely change him. And I don't want that. He knows how I fell, but he apparently has a good reason to date her. The reason: he is lonely. That is it. All he really wants is a make-out-buddy. And yes, I know that for a fact cuz he told me so. The love of his life walked all over him (reminds me of me and the guy I love) and now he thinks it will help take away the pain. I told him it won't. But no one ever listens to me. Plus I feel like crap today! I've just realized how hopeless it is that anyone could ever love me. I go through heartbreak after heartbreak. And I don't want it to happen again,. But how can I stop it? I can't. And it is horribley not cool. So I get to sit here and listen to Guster's "Amsterdam" until it is time to go to bed. I don't know why but I love that song. For some reason I can identify with it so much. Have no clue why. Ah, well.

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