I was just at the super market and there was only one line open. On top of this all of the automatic tellers were down. Why the fuck there is only one teller at five in the afternoon is beyond me.
Anyway, I got in line behind a thirty something guy with a case of beer who was behind a gargantuan white behemoth of a woman. She was like Moby Dick trapped in a sweat suit.
Anyway, apparently her bill was too high, so she made the cashier re-ring all of her groceries. It was still too high (it was the same damn price) so she got in an argument with the cashier. The argument must have lasted ten minutes and involved every manager in the store.
Meanwhile the line was growing longer and I was getting ever more impatient. Finally I couldn’t take it any longer.
“God damn it, can’t you quit being such a bitch, I just want to buy a pepper and an onion and go home.”
She looked like a hippopotamus that was trying to mimic a lion.
“Don’t you ever take the lords name in vain. I should smack you right in the jaw. I should smack you in the face for calling me a bitch. My daddy doesn’t talk to me tha….”
She kept on droning on but I decided to set my groceries down and just leave. In the parking lot the guy that was trying to buy a case of beer (he never actually bought it) said to me…
“Jesus Christ, was she ever a bitch.”
Jesus Christ indeed. Anyway, I decided to share the love with many of you and I distributed several smack and several threats of smacks. Smacks all around people.