Saturday, September 6, 2003

Stand? I Say Sit!

I am not sure if the Stand commercials are airing on cable television in your neck of the woods, but, here in Ohio, they are shown at every commercial break. The commercials depict a bunch of high school aged kids attempting to convince people to sign a petition in an attempt to banish tobacco from MTV’s programming. The logic behind this “holiest” of crusades is that MTV doesn’t depict violence or drugs, yet tobacco kills more people than violence or dugs put together. If you haven’t guessed already, this commercial really pisses me off. My first problem with this video is that these kids actually believe that MTV promotes smoking, and that this promotion is actually influencing kids to smoke. If a bunch of social rejects from the real world puffing on camels makes you crave nicotine, you are a worthless human being. Everyone, and I mean every single person in the world, at least knows that cigarettes don’t help improve your health, and the majority of us realize that use of tobacco products can lead to all different types of nasty cancer. There is so much anti-smoking propaganda in the media that children come out of the womb now with inherent knowledge that cigarettes are bad. The other problem that I have with Stand is the smug-faced high school kids that are behind this pointless crusade. They actually believe that they are going to make a difference. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for attempting to better humanity, however, there are better (please excuse the over use of better) ways to go about it. Go work at a soup kitchen, pick up litter on a road way, help organize a fund raiser to open up a boys and girls facility that gives children of broken homes a place to go after school…anything is more noble than attempting to keep tobacco off of MTV. You know what I think? I think that these kids are greedy, scholarship seeking little finks. One of them probably realized that if they focused on MTV and cigarettes someone would probably put them on television (most likely a cigarette company), and then colleges will be knocking on their doors. Well I have seen there little ploy and I hereby pledge to create a competitive organization, called Sit. The members of Sit will be required to do absolutely nothing except meet at a Starbucks once a month, drink coffee, and bitch about Stand. Because if you are going to create a pointless organization, the least you should get is some decent coffee.

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