myOtaku.com: Hieis Dark Kitten

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1990-11-16
Gender
• Female
Location
• Kentucky D:
Member Since
• 2005-03-01
Occupation
• 12 grade student
Real Name
• EJ

Personal

Achievements
• Decent artwork :P
Anime Fan Since
• The first time I watched DBZ and Pokemon!!!
Favorite Anime
• It's a manga and it's Love Attack
Goals
• To play guitar decently :3 To graduate!
Hobbies
• Drawing, dancing, hanging out
Talents
• Drawing

myOtaku.com: Hieis Dark Kitten

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

*heavy sigh*

I really have nothing to say, I have failed my godd friend...I just wish I could of said what I wrote in her note to her face..It might of I dunno done more. When I finally went to sleep (which was about 12 am) I was crying, I cried last night for about 2 hours. I want to fix what is broken between my friend...but It no longer can be helped. This has gone WAY too far. and Her and my other friend got into a fight just because of me. And that isn't right nor is it fair to them... So If my friend Alayna doesn't want me in her life then so be it. If that what truely makes her happy then I should accept it. I shouldn't be trying to hold on to her if she is all ready gone. I know I still have Katie and Dolly, and that they will always be there for me no matter what.... and I'm here for them and Alayna, if she ever comes back... I know I will miss her terriblely...but, IT's best if it makes her happy...I just want them to be happy no matter what happens to me...I would sell my soul to the bottomless pits of hell for all three of them... I just pray to God that they know that. All three of them. Katie, Dolly, AND Alayna... I don't care if she doesn't like me...I will always love her....no matter what happens...

Even though, I know she is gone, and I know this can no longer be fixed, but my heart, my mind and my soul do not want to accept this... I want to stay in the little reality where everything is just peachy and fine, but then I can't, becuase that's lying to myself... And the more I talk about this the more I just want to bawl my eyes out... I'm trying not to, I've all ready cried enough over this... *sigh* I just wish everything would be fixed and things would go back to normal, like before... But now I realize, that if I want her to be happy, then I have to leave her life....for now, and forever... Soo...I'm going to get off here now, Goodbye all....

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