Thursday, February 12, 2004

So messed up...
I've just started my visual arts class in this semester so I was very excited to start. My best friend is in it too so I was all happy at first. However, after a few classes it became the exact opposite. My friend enjoys anime and such too, but i feel like she is alsways trying to compete with me in art. Out of no where she would sudeenly be like "Geez your just soooo good...unlike us other none talented people"(sarcastically). This was ignorable at first but eventually got quite annoying.By competing in sumthing that is meant to be fun and a enjoyable learning experience would ruin it. And eventually it did ruin it for me. I noticed that my friend wanted to be good sooo bad she spent hours and hours on a peice that would of taken me about half and hour to bring out in the same qaulity. I guess I may sound jealous..but deep down inside I guess I am afraid she will someday be better then me. I guess I am jealous and greedy. I'm greedy because I want all the attention of being "half decent"(compared to you guyz I suck) ..BUT compared to my other friends I am half decent.I don't wanna feel jealous like this. I wish I could just be happy for her new found hobby..but I just can't. She's better at me in all the sunjects of skool. I just thought their could be ONE thing that could be mine...I dunno anything anymore...I guess I'm just dumb.
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Tuesday, February 10, 2004

   Oi
Wow I'm in a real drawing block don't really have any idea where to put the first line...or in fact have no iea which anime I am goin to draw...:S..this mite take awhile
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Monday, February 2, 2004

   What a world we live in.
You know what a strange thing is. I've never once met anyone who is truely happy.Sure, I've met lots of poeple who seem happy on the outside but their not that happy.Its imposible for anyone to have everything perfect in their lives to be physically and constantly happy. I guess it depends on how you deal with the sadness that may come around the corner. Life is 10% what hapens and 90% how you react. It would be imposible to find happiness if you constantly see everything in only sadness. Even the happiest things can seem sad because you refuse to see it in any other way.You might be wondering why I am suddenly preaching all of this. I guess this is the result of the phone kall a received from one of my friends. One of the things she wanted to know was what were the bad things about her. So I told her one of her worst qaulities was she is never here for her friends when they need her most, but when she needs them we HAVE to be there.I figured this selfishness was developed because she is the kind of popular person who will never be alone. Where ever she goes there will always be someone that will follow her. To another person her life may seem like a paradise. By the way she speaks about herself though tells me otherwise. Thats why i concluded that no mater what life, situation or reputation you may have. Everything that affects your happiness the most is not the pyhsical things that happen outside. It is the emotions and the way you cope with these happiness and sadness.
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Saturday, January 31, 2004

   Snowed In
Wow te weather down here's horrible we have snow past our knees. We ctually have to reserve time to shovel out of the driveway when going sumwhere... my familiesgot a snow plough that is this little cheesy runt of a machine. It so krappy it doesn't even work good in this kind of weather.
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Thursday, January 29, 2004

Come on!
Geez poeple lets everyone sign my G/b the next time you drop by ok?!I haven't had a entry in forever!The stats say poeple visit, but no one signs!Aiya!

theOtaku.com: What Gundam Wing Character Are You?

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