Tuesday, April 8, 2008

   Thank You

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry about yesterday's post, I didn't mean to worry anyone. I was just having a bad couple of days and I didn't have time to explain myself because Tony might be breaking up with his boyfriend and this time he actually needed me. The only reason I have time today is because I'm actually typing part of this on Monday night, and I'm home sick today. So the weekend started off fantastic to be honest. I went over to my best friend Gloria's house for a sleepover since we never see each other in school anymore. Apanda, don't get mad! We've been planning this sleepover for ages and the date was set a long time ago! I'm still trying to figure out that sleepover with you. It's hard cuz with the schedule at work, we only know two weeks at a time and I want it to be a Friday night so we can do that all day with/without make-up thing! I'm doing my best! Don't give up on me yet! Anywayz, so I'm at Gloria's house and we watched the entire Star Wars saga, all six movies! It was fucking awesome! We didn't sleep at all until like ten on Saturday morning! Haha, I know! We're the biggest nerds! But it was amazing, and in between movies we would have the best conversations! We can talk about everything, even thoughts we haven't formulated in our heads yet! Just speaking without thinking or having to modify your words so your companion can understand, none of that, just total understanding. I fucking love this girl! She's just fantastic, and I am beyond grateful to have a friend like her. I know that I will know her until my dying day. It's just something that I'm sure of. And Apanda, she and I were talking about you, about how honest and real you are and utterly human. I was telling her about how while I've really only been friends with you for a few months, I feel like I've known you forever, and I am so grateful for your honesty with me and so thankful that you have opened up to me so trustingly. I want to grow old with you too Apanda, I want to know you the rest of my life, okay? But I digress... So yeah, the weekend started so great, but then Suday sucked ass! Oh my Lord! I posted the 'My Loveless Name' because my mom, she convinced me of it. Utterly. The entire day she let me know just how thoughtless I am. You know how sometimes when someone says something enough that you start to believe it? Yeah. So that began my shitty couple of days. I don't even remember everything that happened. Just little things here and there that picked at my already bleeding heart. And I'm so sorry if I worried any of you, it wasn't my intention at all. And I wish I could be happier right now, because October, I really hate to make you sad or worry you, but sometimes we just gotta go through a 'life sucks' week or two. But I'll get better, of course, because that's what I do. So thank you October for posting all those youtube videos to cheer me up, and also for all the voice messages you sent me, I'll be able to look at them tonight, Lord willing! And thank you to Apanda for smiling at me even if you aren't feeling well either and for letting me hug you in the halls for an awkwardly long time without any apparent reason. I am so grateful. To both of you. Here's some lyics that fit: Thank You by: Led Zeppelin If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you. When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me. Kind woman, I give you my all, Kind woman, nothing more. Little drops of rain whisper of the pain, tears of loves lost in the days gone by. My love is strong, with you there is no wrong, together we shall go until we die. My, my, my. An inspiration is what you are to me, inspiration, look... see. And so today, my world it smiles, your hand in mine, we walk the miles, Thanks to you it will be done, for you to me are the only one. Happiness, no more be sad, happiness....I'm glad. If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you. When mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me. I have to leave now, but if all goes according to plan, I'll be on again tonight. Maybe I'll even get to watch 'The L Word' on Veoh. Bye my pretties, thank you for being here.

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