Monday, March 28, 2005

This is a long post, sorry :( Haven't updated in a week...agonized feminine stuff at the end (please ignore)
Sorry for not updating recently, life's been rather hectic. It still if, but I find myself with a little time to update :)

Um my week was pretty fun, though a little more hectic than usual. I started my lab, which wasn't too bad, but i have a few things to go over before it tomorrow (and the folder is on campus..) Tuesday game was resheduled due to Pornography Debate.. (it was really fun). My wednesday game went well & i had alot of fun. I actually left class early to get there on time, which ended up being kind of pointless since we didn't actually start till like 8. Oh well... Thursday was busy since thats when the tuesday game was switched to. Alyssia and Patrick ended up getting into a fight...and Patrick quit. I'm hoping he'll come back, but he just started another game so prolly not.

LARP was fun. I felt better than i have in a while. People didn't seem to be fighting as much, Eric was actually allowed to play his regular character (for a while). Evan is playing again, since he isn't working. John's new character is alot of fun. however, Patrick's new character kind of sucks. I don't like it as much (in character) and i know that it prolly won't last long. I feel bad for him, since he didn't have a choice about his other character being removed from the game. I don't know for sure who decided, but I'm pretty sure that Meredith (the ST) and Mouse (the president) had something to do with it. Cause Patrick was playing Mouse's ghoul, and he was trying to get embraced by other people, so thats prolly the reason they removed him from play. I hope he comes back, Lysander was at least nice.

I ended up going to the pancake house, since John requested it. I'm getting sick of their food, but i don't know what i can really do about it. I have no way to get to any other restaurant. In the last couple of months, i have eaten in ONE place other than the pancake house. And that was when i went out to lunch and had chinese. Sometimes being a vegetarian SUCKS. Its so irritating how EVERYTHING has meat in it. There are so few choices. I kind of wish i lived in an area that catered to vegetarians more. But this is the midwest. Here, we are known for having a surplus of fast food (and yes this is a statistical thing). Though i heard burger king has veggie burgers. I don't think its spread up here yet though. And even if it was, i don't know whether i could ethically eat there. *sigh*

D&D was pretty fun, though Jamie was gone. She left for Mexico and is gone for a week. So we are without our thief. The ONE character we actually needed this week. *sigh*

Gaming is taking over my life. I enjoy it, but sometimes wish i had more free time. If i had to choose which game to drop...i don't think i could. I have three free days a week. And i never miss my games. Though once i left early (for a play).

Easter was pretty fun. Hung out with Alyssia, Craig, and Ky. We cooked good vegetarian food and played munchkin and watched movies. It was alot of fun. Ky made this sinfully delicous cake, i must get the recipe...and Alyssia made this REALLY good risotto. mmm

Zac if frustrating me. I keep wondering whether to just give up. He is the person i'm interested in right now..and he doesn't seem to fathom that. The sad thing is that i now have like 4 people ACTIVELY working on getting us together and a number of other people who are nudging or just think we should date. And i requested NONE of this. In fact i only mentioned it to like 2 people. So its kind of scary how many people know now.

I called him on Friday, hoping to go to campus a couple hours early and maybe chill with him. He gave me his number (room and phone) and told me to call him or drop by sometime. But he was still sick and didn't want to expose people to it. Though he was getting better and i saw him the day before. I don't know what to feel about it, except kind of sad. I think Patrick is right..(he thinks Zac is avoiding me). And its kind of sad, because he actually told Alyssia and a couple other people, that he thought i was attractive and...well he wanted to get to know me better but he hasn't done ANYTHING to further this.

I just don't know. He knows i like him. He seemed FINE with it. I mean he was even encouraging. And sometimes he is. But other times he just kind of ignores the fact that i'm agonizing over him (or whatever you want to call it). I have even started trying to actively get him to do stuff with me. Its REALLY hard since i'm so shy. I really am. And i really like this boy. But nothing seems to work. I have called him, went on a date with him, hung out with him & his friends (some of who are my friends), I've flirted with him, I've kissed him (on the cheek), hugged him whenever possible, i have talked to him and tried to get to know him better... And i'm seriously at the end up my rope. I wish boys weren't so... unfathomable.

So yeah I have been getting advice from a million different people. And I have tried everything it seems. And none of it is working. And its just upsetting me alot. Its not that he may not like me. I could live with that. But I just don't know whats going on in his head. I need some sort of resolution. *pulls out hair* But hopefully this will be resolved soon.

Thats really all for now, sorry for the long post...
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