myOtaku.com: JD Person

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1990-02-12
Gender
• Male
Location
• in my own little universe, the entrance to which is somewhere in inkster michigan
Member Since
• 2005-03-25
Occupation
• slacker/writer/brooding mystic/spaz/idiot/confused wandering lost soul/puppy [in joke] Straight, brown haired Eiri Yuki
Real Name
• J-D, Got it memorized?

Personal

Achievements
• i've managed to spend 10 years in school and never had a girlfriend, thats an achievment in its sadness. but i've been in school 12 years now...
Anime Fan Since
• i first saw Gundam Wing
Favorite Anime
• Chobits, Gundam Seed,excel saga, Bleach, Naruto, Ergo Proxy, Blood +, Myhthical Dectective Loki Ragnarok, Makai Senki Disgaea, Tokko, Pucca, Gravitation, Ikki Tousen, Full Metal Panic, Kare Kano, Blue Gender, GITS, Cromartie High, inuyasha,.hack,kenshin,
Goals
• to gain good friends and to meet up with "someone" over the summer.
Hobbies
• writing my Flamer Fic, surfin' the net, training with various weapons
Talents
• annoying people, being crafty in times of trouble

myOtaku.com: JD Person

Monday, February 27, 2006

Love.
two posts today, love and my favorite new show, please read both.

now some of you said that you don't take love lightly.
to me that implies that i do,
was that your intenion?

well either way i will tell you all about lovre for me.

first off to me love is the heaviest thing on earth, i carry it like it ways as much as a planet,
because love is my world.

since i was a little kid i wanted love, i but i wanted the kind i couldn't have.

see many people have many different definations of love, this is mine:

Love:
love is someone making you do something you absolutly despise with all of your soul...

and making you enjoying every moment of it with all of your heart.

see i wanted to be that boy who gets kissed by the girl and goes "yuck" but secretly falls in love with her, fall for the girl who upon hearing "yuck" knows its her solemn duty to tackle the boy down and kiss him until his voice runs out, then kiss him some more just for fun. i wanted to fall in love against my will and hate evey moment of it while secretly loving ever moment of it.

i want to be reluctant, i want to be tricked, forced, ordered, and controled, because from anyone else i'd hate those things, but i know from that one person i'll enjoy them.

for all my life i wanted that scenario, but unfortunatly, unlike SEELE, my scenario did not pan out, i went through elementary school and didn't have that moment, no recess at middle school so the moment is much less likely to occur, then in 7th grade it happened, i had my first real crush, which means no reluctant love.

i mean i was gaga for this girl, all because she stood up for me, and she was cute, so i bought her a silver anklet with my points from a fund raiser, with all the grace a crushed school boy can, then i gave her chocolates on valentines, which she gave to my friend [at the time, the one that robbed me] so i wrote "do u [heart] me?" on a piece o paper and gave it to her, she never said anything. so next year i had a crush on this ditzy blonde who seemed to think i was funny, i never got around to confessing my feelings, too many stoned friends.

then in ninth grade everything changed i actually fell in love.

Dafina, i will always remember her, i'm still so drawn to her. at first it was a crush like any other, but then, she sat by me, and started talking to me, her cute smile, those soft eyes, that tender voice, those breasts the size of oranges [i'm drawn to flat chests, though it actually took me a year to remember to look and see how big they were] she liked me, she was so sweet, and two years older, but i didn't care! this was too perfect, we must be meant for eachother! so i wrote her a love letter,, in it i said how i felt, and calling on past experience i said, "i love you as a friend, if we can be more than that, i'd love that, if not i'm just glad we can be friends, and if we can't be that anymore either then just tell me and i'll never be near you again, just so long as your happy." i also asked, that if she willed it, i'd be honored to habve my first kiss with her, if just one on the cheek, the softest one on the lips, or more.

i asked if she wanted the final choice for me to go away, and she said no, in a way i knew she was sincere with all her heart i asked about the kiss, she just softly shook her head no, i felt like i had really fucked up , but then, i felt a soft, gentle warm embrace, one of love, it was Dafina and she spoke, in a voice so soft, so warm, so happy, but about to cry. she said that this hug was all she couldn't give me my first kiss, but she could give me this hug and that the last choice, for me to go away, she'd never want that, that she really valued me as a friend.

she may have been kinda dumb, so i let her copy of me, but she was wise, she knew many deep things, and all the ways of the world. i know she didn't kiss me, because she didn't want to take that milestone from me, without being able to give me more. i'm glad she didn't now, because she did so much more, she broke me into a million pieces, but then put me back together so lovingly, that i was stronger than ever.

Bev reminds me of her, but Bev is mine, and i'm even more her's. and Bev gives me my definition of love everyday, i hate when she does it...

but i love every moment of it.

hail zeon.

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