myOtaku.com: JD Person

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1990-02-12
Gender
• Male
Location
• in my own little universe, the entrance to which is somewhere in inkster michigan
Member Since
• 2005-03-25
Occupation
• slacker/writer/brooding mystic/spaz/idiot/confused wandering lost soul/puppy [in joke] Straight, brown haired Eiri Yuki
Real Name
• J-D, Got it memorized?

Personal

Achievements
• i've managed to spend 10 years in school and never had a girlfriend, thats an achievment in its sadness. but i've been in school 12 years now...
Anime Fan Since
• i first saw Gundam Wing
Favorite Anime
• Chobits, Gundam Seed,excel saga, Bleach, Naruto, Ergo Proxy, Blood +, Myhthical Dectective Loki Ragnarok, Makai Senki Disgaea, Tokko, Pucca, Gravitation, Ikki Tousen, Full Metal Panic, Kare Kano, Blue Gender, GITS, Cromartie High, inuyasha,.hack,kenshin,
Goals
• to gain good friends and to meet up with "someone" over the summer.
Hobbies
• writing my Flamer Fic, surfin' the net, training with various weapons
Talents
• annoying people, being crafty in times of trouble

myOtaku.com: JD Person

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Divided.
Man, i hate having a concence.
i mean i love my BG, and most of you support me in my artist expression involving a naked angel girl [on a side note, no one cares that EVA shows us at least 18 naked angels, counting Rei and Koaru, not to mention all the different variations of the 18th angel naked, and the whole damn entrance to Elfen Lied... fuck my inner self! this is going to be out loud!

i mean for god's sake, you see NOTHING!!!!! yes, i know it is a bit hard to explain to others, but fuck [this is going to be funny in a in a minute] i've had to sit with yaoi BGs in my face all the time, i mean i truly am sorry some my see my bg as being offensive, but i really do like it, i may change it if i see another i really like, but its really not that bad. i'm sorry it offends some of you, but i'd really like to express myself.

at the same time i don't want to alienate people, so i do, in some parts want to take it down. i don't know, i'm conflicted. i hate being so, me-ish, i'm always conflicted, i want to be ,me, i want to show others the me that is me, and be excepted for me, for the one that i am, but i want to be liked, i want others to like and accept me, so when me, and being liked are opposed i tend to want to bend. i lose myself and try to be accepted, i was locked away for so long, and it took so much work and compsassion for me to finally show myself, that i'm not going back into that darkness again! so if you don't like me, fuck you! i'm sick of always changing to make others happy! i'm going to be myself from now on, no more pretending...

fuck confliction, my will to exist just nuked my will to please, this self shall not be lost due to the disliking of others. i get offended all the time by BGs and stuff, and i still visit, i still go, even though people have suicidal lyrics on their BGs, or .gifs about cutting as their avis, that play emo rock about just wanting to die, because except those people. why is it that people can have pics of slit wrists, or suicide, or pain, and everyone is like " i see no problem here." but i have a bit of skin showing and people flip the fuck out. why is it that you can sing about cutting, but masterbation is taboo? why are images of wounds acceptable, but a naked, completly covered girl is offensive? i find my BG beautiful, and yes, at first i did this as a "look at me." type thing, but i hoped, that if you looked at it, it would sink in it was harmless, or at least tolerable. but i guess pain is better than pleasure, blood, and hate, and misery, those are all well within the confines of safety, but pleasure, beauty, cuteness, and a bit of senuality are *menacing voice* PURE EVIL.

and for the record, if i had a digital camera, my bg would be me wearing 3 socks at a smile, if you don't get that, then study the male anatomy. so don't dare call me sexist, i'm not getting off on this, its not porn to me. onto the pure all things are pure, and i'm sure as hell NOT pure, so you must be trying to see evil in this.

i'm sorry i'm such a douche bag, and i have my semi-nude BG, but hell my friend color me evil had a BG with the same level of nudity, none. its implied nudity, i mean i guess if you use your imagination you can see whats underneath her hands, or what the page cuts off, but i'm not trying.

and i apologize that i cannot change to better suit your mood, but i was locked away in the darkness of my heart too long, i know from experience that tactical losses add up, and from my addiction [i put the dic... too easy] know how fast victory over a past self becomes defeat to the parts of you you hate. so i can't give up what i believe is me, i'm sorry if my ways don't suit you, and i really wish i could make you stay, but i can't change, or else i may not stop until i'm not me anymore.

please forgive me, stay if you can, leave if you want, but i'll be here so that if you ever want to come back, you know where i am.

and if you can't tell, i had an eppiphony mid-post, so yeah, i'm back to loving me for me, sorry, but i'm not broken yet.

i will eventually change it, once i find one more beautiful than mine is now, until then you'll just have to deal with this one.

i will work on Absolute Power eventually

-Quote-

"You find me offensive? I find you offensive
For finding me offensive
Hence if I should draw a line on any fences
If so to what extense if
Any, should I go? 'Cause it's getting expensive
Being on the other side of the courtroom on the defensive
They say that I cause extensive
Pshycological nerve damage to the brain when I go to lenghts this,
Far at other people's expenses
I say your all just too god damn sensitive
It's censorship"

-Eminem

-Senshi jokes-

Time waits for no man but Chuck Norris, while he recovers from two sets of broken ribs.

-AP Comments-

Kit: *sarcastically* You speak your mind!? NEVER!!!!

Me: shut up or i'll poison your dialogue on purpose.

Kit: you do it enough on accident...

HAIL ZEON!!!!!!
Comments (10)

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