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AIM
• Kagato360
E-mail
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Vitals
Birthday
• 1990-02-12
Gender
•
Male
Location
• in my own little universe, the entrance to which is somewhere in inkster michigan
Member Since
• 2005-03-25
Occupation
• slacker/writer/brooding mystic/spaz/idiot/confused wandering lost soul/puppy [in joke] Straight, brown haired Eiri Yuki
Real Name
• J-D, Got it memorized?
Personal
Achievements
• i've managed to spend 10 years in school and never had a girlfriend, thats an achievment in its sadness. but i've been in school 12 years now...
Anime Fan Since
• i first saw Gundam Wing
Favorite Anime
• Chobits, Gundam Seed,excel saga, Bleach, Naruto, Ergo Proxy, Blood +, Myhthical Dectective Loki Ragnarok, Makai Senki Disgaea, Tokko, Pucca, Gravitation, Ikki Tousen, Full Metal Panic, Kare Kano, Blue Gender, GITS, Cromartie High, inuyasha,.hack,kenshin,
Goals
• to gain good friends and to meet up with "someone" over the summer.
Hobbies
• writing my Flamer Fic, surfin' the net, training with various weapons
Talents
• annoying people, being crafty in times of trouble
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Sunday, December 10, 2006
Ego trip.
yeah, i'm sort of wrestling with my own stupid ego at this moment.
i think i have an inferiority complex, or is it superiority? i don't really care about being better than people, i just don't like it when people are superior to me.
i don't know, its to the point i'm often frustrated by my ineptitude in comparison to my beloved, even if i consider the things i'm better than her at i'm still annoyed by the things that she is blaringly superior to me at.
the current cause of my angst is that Bev got to go to an anime convention, being as she lives in one of the biggest and most important cities in the U.S., and via my American bred beliefs, the world. yes she lives in vegas, i live in FUCKING DETROIT! yeah, like they are going to hold an anime convention a cobo hall. Wow, yippy-fucking-do, we get the International Auto Show, i'd give up the chance to annually see concept cars if i could go to anime conventions without making a huge trip out of it.
well in any case she got to see what was a apperently an as of yet unreleased episode of Death Note, which up until now i showed no interest what-so-ever in, but based upon her description of the events in this episode i found it nessacary to wiki the series and read the episode descriptions. unfortunatly it was at that time i learned my love had gotten the premiere pass, and i wanted to learn more about what she described. so yeah, i'm being as pissy little bitch as usual. i guess i'll just keep using the ole' wiki-pedia until i come across the episode she previewed, and then i could also watch it on youtube, being as it is being uploaded on there. i really have no reason to be in such a foul move except that i'm just so fucking petty, just like how i get all annoyed when i see that barely anyone visits me, and especially my love, even though i keep rising in the rankings.
i guess i'm just a terrible person, i totally spaced on Kitty's birthday today because Bev, though not to my knowledge, was at that convention, so i kept trying to call her, and being as i was trying to contact her Kitty slipped my mind. now see i was deliberating on wether or not i'd go in the first place, but i was going to decide, the fact that i forgot means i didn't decide, and i'm pissed that that power was taken from me.
the only thing i do seem to be good at is being Bev's boyfriend. i never get mad at her, even if her actions or abilities frustrate me, i don't see them as her faults and i love her too much to take my own obsession with inadiquacies out on her. i don't see it as a bad thing that she has advantages over me, i hate myself for being at such a disadvantage in so many cases.
man i wish i was bigger than this, that i was a better man, but it turns out i am this small and petty. i'm a horrible person except to the one person who loves me most, and she is the only person i seem to show any redeeming qualities to. its pretty funny that i can be such a contridiction, i'm great tpo one person but selfish and petty to all others.
oh well, guess ifg i've gone this long i can keep going, no use in hating myself for hating myself, not that would be a vicious cycle.
-Quote-
Myui: [in a comment] Sunset and moonrise, two sides of the same coin. Why did we land on the moon? Mankind's unending quest for all things round.
Me: [reading] Yeah, but if tits looked like the moon they wouldn't be anywhere near as appealing.
HAIL ZEON!!!!!!!!!!!!
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