|
Well, this probably won't do me any good, since Reoku NEVER visits my site anymore. Matter of fact, no one does. Heh. I feel like I'm just fucking surrounded by friends. Wouldn't you?
Who am I kidding? There is no, 'you'. *Rolls eyes.* Sorry about being such a bitch, but, it seems that I'm just fallowing suit. You see, people tend to get bitchy when their best friend fucking forgets completely about them!
I'm sorry, Reoku, but you have been such a bitch lately. It's like you don't hear anything I say! I'm sick of hearing, "I hope I didn't offend you." Jesus christ! Why the hell did you say it, then!? Listen, next time John comes up here with you, I'm staying home. I figure that it's a hell of a lot better to be alone and be ignored, than to be with my best friend and her boyfriend, and be ignored. Don't bother coming to my house to get me next Friday, because I'll probably just slam the fucking door in your face. Gee, seem familiar? I believe I did that when you were being a bitch while you were here last weekend. My god, I was talking to you on Yahoo, and you were sad that you had to get off. Not because you wouldn't be able to talk to me. The one who you won't be able to see until next weekend, and won't be able to talk to for a while. But, beacuse you couldn't talk to John when he got online. John, the one and only, the one that you see every fucking day! And I swear to god. If I hear that he cries again because 'it's his fault' I'll fucking say what's on my mind. I'm sick of being nice to people for the sake of my friends. Because, honestly, I was blaming him. But, no, I couldn't say that, because that would have hurt you. You know what? I'm fucking sick of worrying about hurting you. You don't seem to care much about hurting me. You used to say things about how much you hated people who are in a relationship and shove it in your face. Do you remember that? I sure as hell do. Because, if I'm not mistaken, I agreed with you. Huh, silly me, I guess I was the only one, wasn't I? Everywhere I look, it's 'I love John' this, and 'I love John' that. For once, JUST ONCE! I'd like to have a normal conversation with you! I don't talk about the guy I like 24/7. As a matter of fact, I've never written, 'I love' anyone anywhere for more than a day. I'm happy for you. Believe me, I am. I'm just sick of not being able to talk to you. Pan is, too. She's just too nice to say anything about it. Well, I'm not anymore. I'm sick of hearing Pan cry about how she feels neglected and shoved aside. Because I can relate. This is the same fucking thing that happened with Tab. Me and her were really close. Best friend close. Now, I can't even say hi to her, without hearing about what Timmy did that day. I'd love to talk about the random shit that we always talked about, and not have a guys name pop up. Wouldn't you? The only times I even bring up the guy I likes name, is when you start talking about John. Me and Pan aren't shit compared to him, are we? Because, I'll tell you right now, that's what it feels like. I don't care if I'm second best, or who I'm second best to. But, when you start telling me, without really telling me that I am, I'll fucking go off. Huh, kinda like now.
My own peom (Life) pisses me off, now. It seems like it's all a lie. I'm done feeling sorry for myself, and have been. But, you make it so fucking hard to not feel sorry for myself. It makes me think of how truely alone I am. I don't even have you anymore. Now, I'm only thinking about me and Pan. The ones who are being neglected, and are sick of it. Did you know, that she doesn't think that you like her anymore? Christ, Reo, how wonderful of a friend you are. People who forget about their friends, and think about no one but their significant other, make me so sick. I'm done losing friends. I see who my real friends are, now. Btw, tell Liz, that whether we're friends or not, Chris' birthday will still be celebrated. I won't let anything stand in the way of that. Chris' birthday will not be ignored just because I'm in a fight. He's more important than that.
"I hope I didn't offend you."
~Kaatje
|
Time to unload.