Saturday, January 22, 2005

1:32 PM.

Who is this Irresistible Creature who has an Insatiable Love for the Dead? "University of Washington chemistry mid-term - submitted by sting_au2000 The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, which is why we have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives of heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some varient. One student however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume of Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase untill all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop untill Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms.Banyan during my freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you" and we take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true. Thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze. The student recieved the only "A" given." Story courtesy of atheistempire.com and Trey's demented sense of humour. Gotta love it. I'm going to see Phantom of the Opera today with Lauren, Kayla, Trey, and Johnnie. GOOD TIMES!!! But I still consider Hair to be the better musical. Lol. I made breakfast for my mom today - refried beans and mexican mix cheese quesadilla and an egg-scramble with onions and portabella mushrooms with a dash of some spices. She really enjoyed it! I love making people happy by making them a meal or doing something nice for them...it makes me super warm and fuzzy inside. Plus, cooking is one of the few things I'm good at. ^.^; I got some mail from Aleia a couple days ago, she sent me stuff from Egypt!! There was some really good Egyptian sweets and this BEAUTIFUL sheer scarf thing. And the cutest letter! I swear I want to just hug that girl till I can't hug her anymore. Uhm...there was something else I wanted to say except I--oh wait! I remember! Lauren and I played the most HILARIOUS game last night!!!!!!! It was called Alien Hominid, and basically, you're aliens that have crash-landed on Earth and the FBI has your ship and you need to get it back. So you run around the world battling the various armies/secret services of the world (ie: FBI, communist Russia, military base at Roswell) and oh my God! We could NOT stop laughing the whole time we were playing that game. It's like Invader Zim, except in video game form. * mad giggle fits * Uh. That's all I have to say. QOTD: "Shake off all the fears of servile prejudices, under which weak minds are servilely crouched. Fix reason firmly in her seat, and call on her tribunal for every fact, every opinion. Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear." -Thomas Jefferson -Karma

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