myOtaku.com: Kiiro Sunshine

myO Still <3's You

Vitals

Birthday
• 1988-12-07
Gender
• Female
Location
• Surprise
Member Since
• 2006-07-28
Occupation
• Finding a job.

Personal

Achievements
• I achieve anything that I want to achieve.
Anime Fan Since
• I was really little.
Favorite Anime
• um......Yu Yu Hakusho, Vandread, Orphen.
Goals
• To become me.
Hobbies
• Just about everything.
Talents
• That's for me to know and if you wanna find out then just ask.

myOtaku.com: Kiiro Sunshine

Thursday, September 14, 2006

In the end.....I still come out.
I'm not entirely sure on how to put this, but I guess i'm in a depressed state and I would like some help on getting out of it. I knew that I was in one but I have been like that for some years now. But it has never affected me like this before. I mean....people are starting to notice and now are concerned with it. I don't know what to tell them. It's not just one thing. It's my entire life, my way of life, my way of thinking, my feelings, my thoughts. It's not a simple thing, I can't just.....tell it all to you. Besides...people seem interested in helping me, but....they lose interest because....fuck it....because it makes them nervous. It weirds them out. I have problems just like everyone else. I help people with there things...at least I try to help....and when it comes to me, they want to and then it takes to long and they just don't....they make it worse. Therapists don't help, they make it worse...they open a big can of fucking worms and the session isn't long enough to fix it. So I go out all vulnerable and hurt, and a big feeling of loss and loneliness. It's effecting my relationships with my friends and family. All I want to do is lock myself into my room and never come out. In the end....I come out. But it just doesn't cut it. Oh well...it's not like you all are going to even give a fuck anyways..
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