Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Sorries *hug* (warning- sort of depressing post)

Hi everyone!

First- thank you, Kelsey, Lys, Meagan, MerokoYui4 and Noir for your sweet comments on my last post. ^__^ I was amazed how many people commented and I really did appreciate each one *hugs*

Now- I'm really, really sorry for just disappearing from the site for so long (I think it's been two weeks) Hopefully none of you really noticed my absence -.-; I feel terrible about not giving any warning about this sort of thing, but...

Well, basically, I got really busy and then I let myself get too stressed out (yes, I admit that most of my anxiety was my own fault). Mom even warned me to stop cleaning so hard. We were going to be having our extended family Easter get-together at our house and I ... I just wanted to make sure that everything was perfect and that there was something that everyone could do and they'd enjoy themselves.

It sort of worked, too. The family had a really good time and even the boys enjoyed the activities that I had spent the past week(s?) working on for them.

But, umm, I spent most of the time trying to sneak away to anyplace in the house that was quiet without them noticing. I kept getting anxiety attacks and I was so stressed out from everything that I had been doing that I could barely eat anything either, which just made it worse.

I'm happy to say that I managed to wait until everyone had gone home to break down crying! (I know that probably sounds weird to be happy about, but I am) I acted happy around all of them, but every time I 'act' like that, it's harder to keep it up... if that makes sense...

Basically, yeah, there was more to it than that, but I already feel like I'm making lame excuses. The whole point is that when I start to get really completely stressed out, I start shutting EVERYONE out, and I'm honestly sorry to admit that in the process, I shut you, my dear friends, out. I couldn't deal with people and I didn't even have the presence of mind to come on here to at least let you know.

*hugs you all tightly* I'm still recovering, and I hope to be commenting here again to find out what all of you have been doing, but I don't want to promise anything (since this week is likely to be a bit hectic too T.T)

It hasn't all been bad,though! Gall, I make it sound too depressing! There were several really sweet moments mingled into the madness this last few weeks. A really sweet part was getting to see my little cousins again. Bubba is five now and doesn't seem to want to spend as much time with me (I'm okay with that, I couldn't have handled too much rough-playing anyway. Besides, I was happy to see that the older boy cousins are becoming more responsible and played with him!) And little Anna is as adorable as ever. <3 She's becoming more assertive, which I suppose is a good thing ^^; Hard to keep track of her, though. That child must have given me who knows how many heart attacks by just disappearing outside (we live on a corner with two streets that tend to be a bit busy)

Oh, and I had my little brother (Bless his heart) help me design MyO page here. ^__^ It took a lot of work, but it was something fun that we could do together. He knows so much about computers and is so patient with my extreme lack of computer-smarts XP Do you like the design? (I hope it worked ^^;)

Anyway, thanks to everyone who is reading this and I will be around TheO and MyO again to comment sooner or later. Like I keep telling people- I don't think that I could ever completely leave this site with all of you, my dears, still here. ^_^ I love you too much for that. Take care and (in case I'm not back before this weekend-) have a Blessed Easter.

Have a great day!

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