Monday, September 20, 2004

   September 20th

According to the Which Something Corporate Song Are You? Test...

Hey guys ^_^ I just got home from school, and I'm just being depressed because I was watching a sad movie... I guess everyone goes through those phases. But on a happier note, one of my best friends sent me this song that I thought I knew from somewhere, and well I guess I did. The words sounded so familiar that when I realized it, I was almost in complete shock, and I instantly started breaking down. I know. Loser. Well, it was from a fight (well it's all better now, anyways) and the lyrics are by Something Corporate:

"This is the only lonely picture
waiting on my floor
littering my shore
this is the last true burning letter
given to a girl
written by a boy
living in a world created to destroy

but if i built you a city, would you let me
would you tear it down?

but there you go for the last time
i finally know now what i should have known then
that i could still be ruthless if you'll let me
but there you go and i'm not done
you're waving goodbye, but atleast youre having fun
the rising tide will not let you forget me
forget me

this is the ghost that kneels before me
raises on her tongue, a body full of oxygen
it wont be the last time she'll ignore me
the thinning of my skin, without the strength to go
the winter's setting in, to cover you in snow

but if i built you a city, would you let me
would you tear it down?

but there you go for the last time
i finally know now what i should have known then
that i could still be ruthless if you'll let me
but there you go and i'm not done
you're waving goodbye, but atleast youre having fun
the rising tide will not let you forget me
forget me
forget me
forget me, yeah

ill raise towers and cloud them
rivers and walk them
oceans to drown in
you won't make a sound

but there you go for the last time
i finally know now what i should have known then
that i could still be ruthless if you'll let me
but there you go and i'm not done
you're waving goodbye, but atleast youre having fun
the rising tide will not let you forget me
forget me..."

Okies, now that you know the lyrics, I guess I kind of owe you an explanation right? Okay, this is pure cheese, but I'm a hopeless romantic, so f*ck off lol. This was one of my vacation adventures, so be gentle.

So this was after the fight in the airport between Chole and I, and I had been saying something about how he 'was too nice' and how he 'let people walk all over him' and how he 'should leave me alone' because I was totally wrong for 'somebody like him' and I would totally 'mess up' his life. And he wouldn't stand up for himself, and it pissed me off because he told me that he loved me... and ofcourse I was a dumbass and yelling at him for it. Typical me -_-; So I walked out on him after some harsh exchanges of words on my part, and it was in Florida (during hurricane frances) so I walked outside and sat on the dock in the rain. It was no fun, and no fun because I was an idiot. He dropped the L-bomb, and I dropped like a nuclear one lol. I think I sat out there for a while. It felt like hours though. I just kept on staring at the rising tide and biting my lip. Big girls don't cry, right? My ass. So I kind of closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I was leaning backwards, and I felt something, amd was like 'oh great'. It was him, but I was pissed, and my pride is like one of the most huge things in my life, so I couldn't admit anything. He sat beside me, and gave me a piece of paper. Those words were written on it. That induced the first silence ever between us. It was really eerie, but I'd kill for that feeling. I couldn't look up at him though. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. So I looked at my feet, and was like 'You can't. You're not the type of person'. He laughed, then. I remember that the best, I think. It was so warm, it reminded me of a blanket and hot chocolate in January... and I remember he said 'I hate you' and then he kissed me. It was still raining, and I swear every time it's raining I smile now. And then I said 'prove it'. And I was never prouder of him. He pushed me off of the dock (which wasn't very hihg) and into the water, and then jumped in too. He was laughing, and I looked like a dead rat. But I learned so much more from those moments than I think I ever learned at school. He came to 'save' me, and we both ended up laughing on the shore. One of my favourite memories, that I wouldn't usually share, but my friend just had to find THE SONG. So now I'm in a very sqwweeeee/squish mood, and I can't wait til he gets home because now I finally understand what he was talking about all this time.

Haha I guess I must have sounded like Oprah, huh? Oh well. There IS such thing as a back button. Peace, Love, and Hot Men!

I love you Chole <3

*mwuah*
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