Saturday, May 19, 2007

My friends:

If you're button isn't here, PM me, and I'll get it from you! If you don't have a button, PM me and I'll make you one!

Clubs:

Forget what I said yesterday, I think I'm going to delete my account again. Dang it! I''m just so upset and I'm even acting Emo, yesterday I waisted 5 of my needles becaused I was breaking open my skin with them. *cries* I just can't take it!!! I don't even know why I'm upset, I'll just be sitting on my bed or something like that, and then I'll break out in tears, my brother, Hau-the cow even bought me a gerble because I couldn't stop crying, and Hau is 9 years old, too! *My gerbles name is Kaoru, and it's a boy* Should death be something we look forward to, or something that we should be afraid of, or worry about? Should pain come with ease, or should it be fought with intention? Should we allow love, or shun it as a weakness? Are tears from our heart, or do they come from the pain and sorrow that we endure? Last night I was thinking about something terrible. Suicide. The only reason that I probably didn't really try it, is because I put alot more thinking into it. It would have been selfish of me to put an end to my own pain when others endure it for the sake of others, you know? ^^ And on top of that, my friend, Ricky (Sora-kun) called, and when I told him everything (in a screaming fit) he just said; "If you do that, Onee-san and Onii-san would get mad at you, and what about everyone else, and me?" It was kinda interesting I guess, he even stretched Onee, and Onii to the right length and sound of each different meaning. Haha, that's really not the point though. Well, I'll consider not deleting my account, but I'm close to that conclusion again, most of my friends know what I put up with at home, like KirbysDouble, for instance. And maybe I shouldn't take that out on all of you....I don't know, talking doesn't alwase help, either. Expeacialy when you don't know what's making you so upset. I won't even go see a councler, because sometimes it's like, "Shut Up!!! You just don't understand what I'm going through!!!" But, I'm done with this post, I hope I didn't ruin anyones day, I've already ruined mine. -|Koneako|-

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