Friday, May 23, 2008

MOOD:

Frequently Changing.

So how do I start out this post?

So it seems. Just when you think things could get no worse than they were. Those extra terrible things creep up on you and destroy that extra 1% of your life that was left.

I feel like everyone is plotted against me.

But anyways. What would you call my current pain? It's worse than the case with Kenni. Yes. Much worse. Because this was a person who it seemed, helped me through that. And now it seems Ive even lost Kaoru. Though, with the case. He wasnt ever even there.

Oh but of course. Though I have a loss, I have a gain. I can build an even stronger relationship with the real Kaoru now. It seems that really, the only difference is first to last name, and rather if we shall classify the poor soul as a female or a male.
All the same. Emma is my friend. But of course, she had to be "Silly Jacob" and delete the Kaoru Hitachiin account. Emma, love, you could have left me at least that much. Dont you think?

I still feel so heart broken and hurt.

But on a different note. Well. There isnt much of a different note. I am so stressed now, it is absolutely rediculous. I cant posssibly even come to words on how I feel. Because it really cant be explained. I feel heavy, and tired. My head hurts, my chest and head throb. And I just want to cry. Over someone who never was even there.

My theme has changed. It could be absolutely pitch black right now and emo. That's how I feel by mounds. But, I suppose I wanted to live for the moment. What got me into the riceballs, Im not sure. Though I wish it was blue and not pink. The color I use is depended on my mood. Blue is how I feel. Not very soft pink at the moment.

Though earlier, my brothers and I were doing a very good attempt at a three way chorus of L's theme. So we had me doing the main tune, and I would snap when my brother Morgan would come in with the background filling, and I'd clap for Logan and his extra effect of let's call it, an alto version of the theme. It was fun.
Thursday is our choir concert. I want to school to be over with. Im so tired lately. Drama. Science project is due Tuesday. I dont know how I'll pull that off.

Hm..what else. Not much actually.
Im sorry guys. I know Ive been complaining alot lately. And all whoo whoo Im gonna leave. But... >.< Now I really think I am. Anyways, I have to paint some bedrooms I think today. I might be on...I might not. It all depends.

Love you all.






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