Sunday, December 11, 2005

t - 9:46am still at work


Ok, so maybe there is something to talk about.....

The usual holiday lonliness and depression has finally kicked in. =/

Why must I be cursed to always be alone in life? Why can't I find that special someone out there just for me?

Maybe I should just give up. The only girls I seem to be meeting these days are still in high school, and that would only lead to big trouble if anything were to happen.... But then, I'm not the best at meeting people... One look at me, and people go running for the door.

Maybe that's why I spend so much time playing FFXI. Trying to get away from life, and the unpleasantness it brings me. There, I can escape everything. Granted, it leaves me feeling more lonely, but still.

Both of my sisters are spending X-Mas with their boyfriends' familes. I'm stuck at home with the parents, and grandma, who I have to pick up on Tuesday. Let me tell you how much fun THAT'S gonna be. (tho i'll probably just spend it watching football and loading songs and porn into my ipod)

I wish I knew what to do about all this... But I don't.
And I know noone can help me, and I have to figure it out for myself. But I can't.
And that I really should just give up, call it a lost cause, and try to move on. But I won't.

Instead, I let it bother me to the point where times like this, which are supposed to be happy ones, just make me miserable.


Misery loves company, but there's noone home anymore.
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