Wednesday, March 31, 2004

welcome to my little world... all my own. Lately I've been thinking, I'm gonna miss my friends... the few I have. We move this Saturday, leaving early in the morning, so tonight was my last church activity to see all the people who've been leaders and role models for me for the past few months, REALLY great people who I've become good friends with. Tonight seemed so different.
Tonight seemed like the end, obviously it was, but it felt unusual. I'm (hopefully) going to take my bestfriend out for pizza on Friday, but I don't know if I can because she got a part in the play she helped write for Diversity Day, and she might have practice, or her parents may say no.
I talked to her for a short time on aim tonight. Getting off aim is like walking into a tree on purpose, stumbling down the road, and falling off a cliff. When I finally get off aim, or trillian (which I use mostly), and disconnect, I finally hit the ground and die a painful death.
I've been spontainious lately, go me! But lately, more than usual. See, it all started when I was on neopets the other day and I imed someone on aim and we become really good friends. All of the sudden, on Sundays I'm reading scriptures in class and answering questions... man, my world is going nutty. Anyway, I've made a couple really cool friends who I look forward to talking to everytime I get on the computer, but they aren't on now.
I gave a presant to my Sunday School teacher, because her birthday is on April 1st. It was so much fun to see her face. I owed her that much at least, and besides I wanted to do it for her. She wrote me a really great letter a month back, and I know without it I wouldn't be getting out of this whole "anti-social" phase of mine... er, not that I'm anti-social... but I hate crowds, and I don't do anything except hide. I was amazed when I got the letter, I'm gonna keep it all my life.
Tonight's activity was a camp meeting; I'm not gonna be here for Girl's Camp. If I go down where we're moving to, it'll be the first time I've ever been to camp in my life. I don't know if I want to, I just hope people won't start trying to convince me that I MUST go... People here were doing that, until we decided we were moving. I said goodbye to the Bishop, although I still like the Bishop who was released only two weeks ago better (I'm used to him, and he made me laugh).
Now I look around this place and everything seems so distant. It's like I'm here, but really I'm so far gone from this place that it's faded into the distance and all I can do now is watch as it slowly disappears into the haze. I'm gonna try to keep in touch with everyone who I've grown to love here, I'm going to be online everyday at 3:00pm waiting for my bestfriend to come on.
lol It's amazing, she's the only other girl who I've met who's my religion that I can actually relate to. We have stuff in common, a lot of stuff, and that's more unusual than anything I've ever known. I'm going to miss her a lot, and we'll be coming back to visit people every year here (I think). It's up to my mom really, but she's got friends at the VA hospital she wants to come back and visit, so I think it's pretty much a done deal.
My history notes you guys hear me talking about every now were read and commented on tonight. My bestfriend, who's nickname is Ashana by the way, said I have to type them up and post them on a site for others to read.
I've been searching for a good layout for my site, everything I find is a deadend, and ten minutes later I decide I hate it and it has to go. Maybe I'll never get my site up, maybe it's just one of those things I'll always have but no one will ever really know or care or be able to help with. All I know is I wish I could just decide on something, and I doubt I ever will, but it sure would be motivational.
Let's see, my room is completely bare. Five months ago I couldn't find spare on my shelves to put all my little knicknacks... now it's just so empty.
I'm rambling, so I guess I should go. Wanna talk to me? I don't know why you would, I guess a comment would be nice. We've moved every couple of years since I was a year old, so I don't need any moving advice, but comfort would be good... *hint* and Ashana, if you happen to see this, give me a comment and I'm REALLY gonna miss you!!!
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