Friday, August 19, 2005

Hiding what it is that I strongly want.
I came in the computer lab half an hour ago. When I left the outside to come in, the sky was an amazing vivid azure blue, with fluffy white clouds (Same as every day, actually) and all of a sudden, all the computers in the lab shut off and quickly came back on again. When booming thunder ensued, I checked outside, to see the sky…. pretty much exactly as I had left it.

So right now at the moment, the sky is an amazing shade of blue and clear of storm clouds, and booming thunder and such out there like some sort of horrible ravaging rain storm.

Never in my life. 0_o


The Big-very-crutial Guide for Aleiaspeak:

When Aleia says “Don’t call me emo cause then I’ll have to cause some sort of bodily harm to your person =D”, in no way should be translated as “Please, I beg of you, call me emo because I like love it vitally depend on when people poke fun of the incredibly yucky/terrible/something-or-other way that I’m feeling at the moment, and it makes my state of mind worse and worse because I take it that you're mocking me. ^_^”


Last night, I lay awake at 3 something in the morning and I was remembering some of the questions that my roommate had asked me, one of them being “*funny-odd look* How can you afford this school, if you’re so poor? No offense! ^^”

(She deducted I was poor herself, although it was incredibly obvious from my answers to her questions prior)

“I'm blonde (duh), have a 4.0 average, in most school campus activities imaginable, I LOVE* pink and I hate mess of any kind. I especially hate it if my half of the room is neat and clean, and the other half is messy messy. *looks pointedly* You know what I mean? ^.^

*She very much so understated herself, when she said that. Enough pink to make a girl queasy. Little Miss “Like, oh my gosh I’m a social butterfly** ^^” and her crazy pink beaded door curtain…
**Her exact words, honest. Without the “oh my gosh” part, but whatever.


*coughs*


Haha. Someone added the word “ducky” in this computers’ MS Word correction/suggestion thing. It took me by suprise, indeed. =)

For some reason, there isn’t any air conditioning either in only my dorm, or on our whole floor. Everyone cept me on my floor has a few fans running in their rooms, so I'm guessing it's the whole second floor of our building. The whole first floor and the other building have air conditioning, so yeah. The second floor water fountain is warm too, and you have to go downstairs to drink cold water. *shrugs*

I finally get validation tomorrow. I have about a thousand dollars I have to pay out of my pocket, and somehow soon. (Soon as in I have to start payment on Monday) I can’t take out a loan for it, so yeah. *frets* (The loan thing that finally went through only covers about five thousand, and what I have to pay out of pocket is all that’s left)

*Frets some more*

I have waaaay too much frustrating excessive energies and it’s honestly driving me crazy and out of my mind. >_<;;;

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Thursday, August 18, 2005

Under the overpass, not in between.
I got a dorm room today with a key and a card, so I’m not locked out of either the building or my room, both of which lock automatically, so I'm really screwed if I lose my one and only single copies of either and both. (I can somehow easily imagine myself in some sort of huge chaotic drama involving that) And an address, with a phone number to go along. Whenever I can find it, anyways.

Now, I think I just need a phone. XD



To make a long stupid story short, I met my room mate, hauled everything I had brought with me in and on my side of the room, found her missing, and was abruptly asked by the dorm-head-leader person if I could leave, to a different room on a different floor in a different building, because my roommate asked me questions that I answered truthfully, and that made her uncomfortable. And yet she still continued asking me questions anyways, then proceeded to file a complaint about me, when I went outside to leave her to herself and her friend because I got this funny bad feeling from her (her being my room mate) and she was slightly freaking/flipping out for no apparent reason.

It felt like a slap in the face. *shrugs*


I’m raging angry at myself, and furiously embarrassed, because I had an audience for most the time.

>_<;;;


And hurt. I mean, I only took it personally. *rolls eyes*

But I’m mostly angry at myself. It is mostly my fault, cause I am too open/cant keep my mouth shut/am probably making myself the main rumor on campus as I type.

And I swear, the next person that calls me emo, I will punch them with a fury of a thousand angry rwarings. I don’t care who you are or how you retaliate; I will at least attempt to cause some memorable pain. ^_^

And apparently, I lie. Dunno about what exactly, but I do. Isn't that great? =)


Not feeling very…. something or other. *gestures*

I have a lot of sleep debt, so yeah. And after today, and yesterday, and the day before…. how about the whole past week, I feel very antisocial, so tomorrow I think I’m just gonna go to class, then financial aid and then the bank, and stay in my room for the rest of the day, doing…whatever. Prolly nothing, cause there’s nothing to do.

Oh, the emotisticalness of it all! *mimics in a high pitched voice and poses back of hand dramatically over forehead *


For some reason, I still feel on the abandoned side, and I am trying to figure out and sort through how come I am reacting/acting in a way that doesn’t seem logical.

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Wednesday, August 17, 2005

The lime has spoken.
No. Nay. Not for one second am I referring to myself as a lime.

Just so you know.


Oh goodness goodness. Let’s see…

Last Thursday after I posted, I went upstairs, sat down in a chair, and promptly passed out for half an hour. My anxiety/nerves wouldn’t even let me pass out properly XD

Anyways, it was a good thing it was only half an hour, because if it was any longer I would have been late late late, and would have dragged and smeared trouble over many levels I would really rather not even look at, let alone experience first hand.

Took a shower, and tried three or four times to wake up my uncle, and it was then that I realized that procrastinating and last minute mad dashes really must run through my dad’s side of the family.


My uncle begrudgingly let me go. I think he finally realized that I am stubborn and persistent (Yes, I do realize that could be a bad thing), and there was nothing in the world that he could do, or could have done, that would prevent me from “throwing myself in a downward spiral of life failure, misery and corruption.”

To each his own, I say. XD


Mhm. An empty belly, cramps, headache and weariness from not much sleep, severe allergies (*Laughs* Honestly, I think the people on the three hour flight had figured me contagious or something. “Achoo!achoo!achoo!*LOUD-NOSE-BLOWING-NOISE*”), three different take offs, landings and planes, and I felt…not that.... good. Grumpy, grouchy, sensitive, nautious and sleepy.

The only money I had was $6 dollars, before the flight, and that had caused me a lot of worry. My uncle kind of refuses to give me the money he said he owes me, from when I was secretary for him, and that burns cause he is paying for all the rest of my brother’s tuition that isnt covered, which is pretty much equal to what I have to pay (Or mine could be less. Dont remember. I have to ask my brother again)

Well, what I mean to say is that I was feeling stuff because of that, and that’s before all the unforeseen problems that all this will cause between then and yesterday. Well, today too, but I believe (Hoping, wishing on a star, crossing fingers) that it’ll be over soon.


I’m going to stop right there about that, cause I’m tripping over myself and getting ahead.

So anyways. I had $6 right before I left the house. My NY aunt came with me in the cab, and came with me as far through the airport that she was allowed.

I am so grateful that at least one person in the family supports me, even if a lot of her support has to be kept secret. *tear*

She gave me $40 afore I went through security, so I would have food and stuff. =)

We forgot about cab fair. I didn’t figure that cab fair would be so expensive, because it’s very cheap in Manhattan. >.<;;

And you know, Manhattan being a place where most things are expensive… *gestures*


Anyways. It’s really ironic, because the lady that drove the cab from the airport was going on and on about girl power, and how if a woman does something, it’s going to turn out better than how if a guy did it (She was using the shuttle landing story that was in the news as a big example)

On and on and on. She struck me as a feminist-Nazi of sorts. It was rather amusing, actually. *Grins*

So just picture the perfect irony, when for the cost of half the money I had in my pocket, she drops me off at the correct hotel chain, but very wrong address.

Feminist Nazi, indeed. *Grins and shakes head*

It took a different cab driver (Cause she left pretty fast 0_o) and most the rest of my money, to get to the correct one.

And stuff and stuff.


Two days there, and because there was chaos and mayhem concerning financial aid, two days at a friend’s house. All I needed was a person who would be willing to cosign a loan for me. Just some basic information and their name. No financial responsibilities in the least, and yet I couldn’t find anyone of age who could do something little like that for me. Hey, my uncle wasn’t even willing to pick up either of his cell phones, and it’s almost unspoken that no one at the house answered the phone (The answering machine currently doesn’t feel like working properly. Not like anyone checks the messages anyways….)

And all that shit left me almost two days completely homeless and in a homeless shelter.


Things that surprised me:


They had one working sink for all the tens of people that were there.

They didn’t have any soap.

They had one roll of toilet paper, and you were only allowed to take out a small amount that you would need under supervision, as it was held ransom up at the front desk.

They didn’t have towels.

The only phone around was a pay phone.

You were really lucky if you were able to get in a shower, as half didn’t work, and the other ones were packed full during the small amount of time allotted for showering.

You had to struggle for enough privacy and fight for enough cleanliness for a place to just change your clothes.

Food seemed a little bit hard to come by, and uh. Not much of it was edible, methinks. =X

In all honesty, I was glad of what I did get though. *nods fervently*

I really don’t know how, but most the other people in the shelter had money to eat from outside. *shrugs*

I couldn’t really sleep, and in the middle of the night, a lady was taken out by the EMS 'cause she was having seizures.

Everyone was gathered/rounded up and yelled at, because a purse was stolen.

A fight broke out between two women and the police were almost called.

Bathroom privileges were denied for everyone that day, because some lady had left some dirty diapers on the floor or something.

You had to wake up by 6:00 am, and have your assigned chores done by 8:45. You were kicked out from then until 12:25 – 1:00 (For lunch), and had to stay out again until 3pm.

Curfew was at 6 pm, and you always had to sign out, if you went outside for anything.

I had a bad feeling that I really really wouldn’t have wanted to be outside at night anyways, not without someone very intimidating by my side. It was odd how I got this feeling from broad daylight. >.-

The police were called anyways that day, because a baby was stolen from a mom.

An old lady in a wheelchair was dumped off, and some kind of services was called about that and stuck around for a long time. More police.

More EMS people. Took some lady out on a stretcher for unobvious reasons.

I know if I go into details about how I woke up there not very well, it’ll come off as whiney and emo, because I felt so miserable and yucky and it was so difficult and very painful to move. Took me bout an hour and a half, to walk to and from the hospital (The staff at the homeless shelter practically pushed me out the door, in their urgings for me to go there) I was told I would be billed if service was rendered, and I’ve seen how high hospital bills can go with no insurance and I figured it would out glare what pitiful amount I have to owe the school anytime, so I just left.

I figured I’ll walk it off, like how the boy’s gym teacher at my old high school used to make the boys handle their injuries. ;P

Even though I got myself out of the homeless shelter, I have a feeling that I am going to be a bit emotional about it for a while, for reasons I would really rather not go into at the moment. -.-

But uh, yeah. To make a long chaotic story short, I convinced my brother, who has no credit and is only 19, to cosign for me. Somehow or other, with the signature loan, if I’m not approved and my cosigner isn’t approved, then something called the Ellie Mae foundation comes in and gives/lends me money. I don’t remember which, and at this point, I don’t care cause I’m so blissfully grateful that something will hopefully work out.

Ugh. Actually, my back still hurts a lot today too, and I’m not quite sure why. >_<

Hey! I had my first days of classes today. Logics class at 10 something (I’m a little bit nervous, cause the professor had compared it to math a bit, and well… *gestures to general direction of mathophobia*) , and English soon after.

I have a feeling the English professor is a Nun. And a strict one while she’s at it.

And odd. It’s hard to explain, but it’s the way she… talks. She seems to end most of her sentences on a high note, like the sentence is a question when it isn’t. 0_o

But oh well.

I am going to try to see if I can finally move into my dorm tomorrow. I want an address. I'm tired of being homeless. =\

[/emo]

XD


Oh yeah. I was told that I have a problem answering yes or no questions. I find that highly amusing.

*Grins*

Aye. At this point in time, there are a few first hand witnesses to the chaotic….tornado that seems to follow/surround me.

Ah. Never a dull moment.

….

X_+


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Thursday, August 11, 2005

Wishing on the petals of a ceremonial bloom
Soon before I left my mom’s house, my dad called and had a proposition for me, a suggestion, if you will. It left me feeling…

Well, you know how when some random part of you falls asleep? It’s rather sudden, and there’s that cold and tingly feeling.

I felt like I had a large bucket of that feeling poured right over me. I felt breathless for a few seconds while my mind went blank, and all I can really say right now is that I have stuff to think about. I don’t mean to be a tease, but at least for the moment, I am not quite sure how to go about explaining a stupid matter that I surprisingly strongly reacted to.

I thought I was over it.


Anyways. Seems like I spent most of my visit at my mom’s house doing chores, because most everyone has an apathetic attitude/state of mind, and it was all making me sad and angry and here I am, getting myself all riled up because no one wanted to do anything, so I figured a productive way to get rid of my angry excessive energies was to clean up as much as I could handle comfortably, cause in the very least, I’d feel better.

And it worked at first, but then I realized how I was doing most everyone else’s chores, and I came to visit, not to clean house, so I just tried staying out of the house as much as I could, which kind of failed most of the last week, but oh well.

I took my siblings for a few hours to the Orby/Rockhill parade/fair thingamajiger that started on Monday. Saw some people I hadn’t seen in years, and saw what seemed like at least 1/5 of the girls left in high school pushing baby carriages, and you had a feeling they weren’t babysitting.

I don’t think I’m going to any of those kinds of events again. They remind me how painfully provincial the towns are, the attitudes and mindset of the people.

If I was forced to live there now, I would honestly consider killing myself.

Or trying to find a main road and take my chances hitchhiking.

Or live in the woods and become a self dependant hermit. Who rambles about nonsensical things that are amusing at most.


On Tuesday, when I had to take the train to leave, my mom had work. My siblings saw me off.


And the conductor almost threw me off the train in Harrisburg, because the Amtrak lady on the phone screwed up so much more with the reservation and ticket than she could ever have hoped for.
*grins and shakes head*

But it’s alright, ‘cause I got it all settled at the Harrisburg station. Somehow, the whole experience has left me with the impression that I “look” honest. Don’t ask.


Been on the train since 10:30, and it was almost 3 and we hadn’t left PA yet. (I was supposed to be at Newark by 3:30) We were stuck in Philadelphia, and I sighted the road that I had promptly gotten myself lost at, when going from Charlie’s house to my mom’s, and it brought back a lot of stuff, which mixed itself right with the stuff I already had, and I realized that I really really had to go to the bathroom. Badly.

As we pulled into the station, I got up and ran to the bathroom. Shut the door and quickly figured how to lock it. Spun around to see what kind of train mess I had to deal with, when the lights went out.

*claps hands*

Right before the lights went out, I saw a square shining glint on the wall that signified there could be an important sign on a plaque of sorts. By the dim light that was barely there, I finally was able to read that passengers shouldn’t use or flush toilets while train is stopped at stations, as conductors are most likely under the train cars doing inspection checks.

Aleia:….. Yeah. I guess I’ll…. use the bathroom later. When we aren’t sitting still. Good thing I don’t feel sick or have really sucky timing or anything. [/sarcasm]



Finally made it to NJ at 5, after spending 7 hours on a train. Goodness knows what happened with/in those two hours we prolly shouldn’t have gained. 0_o;;


Surprised most everyone here, cause most everyone didn’t know I was coming. Did I mention in the midst of my worrying and rushing, I had forgotten to tell people I was arriving? =X

Woops for me. *blush*

And today, it’s Wednesday. Well, technically, it’s 2:30 am Thursday, but it isn’t Thursday for me until I wake up or I feel that it’s morning (Doesn’t matter how dark it is, if you feel it and you’re still awake, it’s the next day.)

So anyways. Today. Wednesday. I spent all of it running around almost like a chicken with it’s head cut off, cept a bit more productive than how a headless chicken would be.

And packing boxes. And suitcases. And throwing things out. And fixing the messy mistake that my school made by telling me the wrong dorm check in date around a month or two ago, and not until less than a week ago sent me a letter saying “Oh sorry, your check in date is actually Monday, not Saturday. Sorry for any inconvenience =) ” and I had already made plans completely centered around the fact of Saturday and this new change temporarily had left me homeless in a strange city for two days.

But I fixed it. ^_^;;

Oh yeah. And contending with the fact that there was a big mess up at the bank, where I ended up owing them a lot of money cause ATMS LIE.

ATMS = The Devil.

Too bad the bank holds me responsible for it.

But I fixed that wreck. And I have $6 to show for it.


And I am currently trying to recover from the blow of my discovery, down here in the basement, that my beautiful feather blanket that I’ve had since 10th or 11th grade is most likely unusable. A *censors herself* *cough* I mean, a well meaning person who doesn’t listen to me when I speak and repeat things many times took the blanket and threw it in the washer, where it got all wet and they discovered it didn’t fit in there just like I had said!, and just kinda dumped it on the floor in a dark corner of the basement and left it there for a few weeks while I frantically searched for it everywhere upstairs and asked all the kids and loudly to myself about its whereabouts, and I had to discover it myself and was stunned because at least I figured it would be very much common sense that it would need a dryer, and this well meaning person who doesn’t listen just left it on a cold concrete basement floor for a very, very long time.


I am already heavy strapped for cash and in the hole with two different people; $6 dollars to my name and in my wallet and going off to traveling for school in three and a half hours and I somehow need to buy special sized sheets for my bed and school books and a pillow and eventually food just so I don’t end up in the hospital for malnutrition and/or scurvy and I don’t quite know how at this point I am going to do all that within at least a week’s time.


I’ve been playing the 24 hour game in my head the past few days. I also haven’t slept more than 3-4 hours since Monday night, but that’s beside the point. All of Wednesday, it was “OMG IN 24 HOURS MY PLANE IS GONNA TAKE OFF”, and “In 24 hours I’m prolly going to be at the Miami Airport, waiting for the next plane! =O” and “In 24 hours I have no idea what I’ll be doing or where exactly I’ll be at, but I know it wont be near here! X_+”

Hey, you never know. In 24 hours, I could be asleep. XD

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Thursday, August 4, 2005

All for naught
I think it's odd, how my mom really really likes Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

If I hadn't witnessed such a happening myself, I never would have guessed it in a million years.


I...

Nevermind.


In a week, everything is going to change.


My uncle got my brother to the train station a few minutes late. They had missed the train by 8 minutes, so yeah.

I guess they were running on Egyptian time. *half grins*


My mom made everyone start on weeding the garden.

Including me.

So many of the weeds were so much taller than me. >_<


Stuff and stuff.


Aannndd... I am going to stop here. I'm not doing that well. I need a break from everyone, and that's obviously not going to happen in a house packed tight with people and no room to breath.


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Wednesday, August 3, 2005

Idly chucking rocks at a glass house.
Last night, I went to the Shade Gap Picnic thingamajiger.

And the biggest events there were the bluegrass concert and bingo. *grins and laughs*


Oh, they had three rides, but I figured them shady.

I mean, think about it. The ride, it’s huge in an awkward and spindly way and you can put it up in less than a day’s time…..

Does that seem very safe to you? Not to me. 0_o;;

Met up and talked to some people I hadn’t talked to in a very long while, so it was nice.

I think the first day is when more people my age come, because last night was prolly about at least 75% grandparent-age people.

Ah well.


My brother didn’t come because he arrived at the train station late and missed it by 8 minutes.


A friend of mine is having a lot of troubles/stress, and since she figures that going/running away from her problems for a while will do it, she might come... here. Where I live, but not at my house, cause I told her there’s no room (Hey, if I had a choice, I wouldn’t sleep here for all different reasons, so I wouldnt encourage anyone else to.)

*bites lip*


My sister’s bunny died yesterday. =\


Eh. Just read an email that threw me off, and now I don’t have much left to say.


What a dork. u.u


Edit: I'm raging angry, extremely irritable, and in dire need of an outlet, when I am stuck in a non outlet/high irritant zone.


Isn't that wonderful? ^.^


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Tuesday, August 2, 2005

Speculating the Universe, and all of its intricate properties
Huntingdon County, Pennsylvania, is not a very happening place. For some reason, I guess you could consider it a "safe" place, maybe for lack of excitement and energy that's here.


I mean, there isn't anywhere that exists that's so safe that nothing bad can ever happen. There are many innocent people who are living proof of that. 0_o



The local news uses the first 5 minutes to replay the news from yesterday and this morning, adds a new piece here and there (You can tell they really scrounged for it, just like most of the rest of the news reports they've broadcasted), and then puts on a summary of the weather. After the summary of the weather, they replay the news they had just broadcasted minutes earlier, right before the long commercial break prior, and then go into a 5 minute extremely detailed fit of the weather, then sports, then replay the news again.

Not that it's splenderific when the news is full of "A hundred people died today because a disgruntled psycho went on the rampage at some random place and ate all their hearts out and drank their spleens and made an escape rope out of their guts and innards and he's out on the loose! Run away! Head off for elsewhere!"


*Shrugs and gestures* Hard to explain.


The people around here are mostly friendly, unless you went to high school with them. ^_~

*cough*As-reiteratedlastnight*cough*


Yeah. Last night, I went to James' house, and watched the Shade Gap picnic parade from his front porch, with him and his sister and some guy friend that she has. His sister is my sister's age. They’re in the same class and stuff and have been friends for a few years, so I've known his sister for a while. James graduated same class as me, but is a year younger. *nods*

A lot of the floats tossed candy out and about to people on the sides.

I honestly can’t think of a time when I made myself so full on Tootsie Rolls (Fruit Punch and good 'ole chocolate are the best)

*Half grins* Cant say I'm that big of a candy person, but oh well. (HYPER TO THE TENTH DEGREE 0_O;;;)


After the parade, I saw this one kid that used to be on the track team with me driving a truck. Greeted him, and asked him where the fair grounds were. A voice next to him snickered and said, "It's down over there, but I'm sure if you start walking now, you'll make it there late Tuesday. *smirksmirk*"

*Mimics him in a high-pitched voice*

The dork that had spoken was the same dork I finished off 5th and 6th grade with, and was unfortunate enough to have him in homeroom with me for all 6 years of Jr-Sr High school.

Eh. Didn’t figure on going last night anyways, because it was uber crowded, especially with the parking. Prolly going sometime tonight, but not by myself.


Tomorrow my brother is coming. =)


Most everyone has to sleep in the living room, including me. The living room is the same room in which the TV resides, and my mom gets up earlier than everyone (I honestly dont understand how; just last night the youngest sister had everyone up till 2am, purposly grating on my nerves. Everyone else awake was almost dying, because they take great pleasure in my agitatedness/rwaring/growling >:| )

But that's beside the point. I mean to say because she wakes up earler than everyone else, she puts the TV on, and if the TV is on when I am not in deep sleep, it gives me freaky-odd realistic dreams/nightmares.

So, as you can imagine, I've been having those kinds of whatevers since I've been here.


*makes a face at you*


In a week, I leave Pennsylvania, and go back to Jersey for a day, to finish packing for school.


Aye, I've been here at my mom's for well over a week, but I really don’t think it feels like it.




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Sunday, July 31, 2005

A sharp prickly insult dressed up so very prettily.
Mhm. Been thinking about that lately (Thanks Sarah u.u)

*sighs*


Since I last lived with my mom, a cat has adopted the family.

I didn’t really get to see him until the first night I came and finally settled down to sleep. He jumped on the couch where I was going to sleep, sat on my lap, opened his mouth wide and pressed his teeth against my leg. He didn’t bite down (thank goodness) but it startled/scared/mystified/made me suspicious and cautious of him after that.

After his odd behavior, he went and slept on my feet. Turns out he always sleeps on the couch, and him sleeping so close to me after seemingly wanting to take a bite out of me made me just a little nervous.

Nothing happened. A few nights later, he started to take to sleeping on me, and hasn’t stopped since.

Allergies dictate that I move from sleeping on the couch to sleeping on the one recliner chair. I figured he was sleeping with me because, well, I’m sleeping on part of his bed.

I woke up in the middle of the night to him fast asleep, curled up on my belly.

*shrugs* Ah well. Apparently, I’m comfortable. XD



The past few weeks, I noticed that I haven’t felt lonely in a long time. Nothing has really changed externally, so I don’t know what would cause change inside.

In no way am I complaining, but it is kind of interesting. To me, anyways.


My mom asked me to cook, using a recipe that I had made up a long time ago.

It came out really good, so I know I've still got it ^_~


I’m confused about certain things, and it’s making me feel funny odd. Mostly because there are people who are trying to convince me to go one way, when I am way too far in going towards another way. I already know that I can’t go the way that people are trying to convince me, not now anyways, but it is making me have some doubts about the path I have already chosen.

It’s making my tummy and my head all tied up in knots. I think I need a rest from…. whatever this is.


I was really suprised when I saw that Fruits Basket #11 came out already, when I had just brought the 10th one about two weeks ago. I think the 11th one was supposed to come out in stores middle of August, but there it was, in the mall at Suncoast.

In the back, it says the next one is due out in December. I swear, that had better be a mistype of sorts, cause that's too long for me to waite.

*raises eyebrow*


Aye, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince was a good read. I finished reading it over a week ago, but it's still worth mentioning anyways.


Hey, I know it's a bit late to ask, but who went to AX? How'd it go?


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Saturday, July 30, 2005

Windmill, windmill for the land, turn forever hand in hand.
The other day I had found one of my sister’s capped insulin needles. I absent-mindedly pulled the plunger out, when it made a really odd noise that I found highly amusing. XD

I continued until my mom noticed the noise. I guess she figured I was making kissing noises (0_o?) because she glared over at me and said “Kissing noises, huh? And who have you been practicing kissing with? You have enough guy friends that I figure it just about impossible that you don’t have romantic interests in at least one of them…”

I didn’t realize that was a sensitive subject till she said it, and I got all riled up and argufied with her till she backed off, insisting that she was just joking and I still can’t take a joke, or tell one from serious.

*glares*


I have a feeling my uncle isn’t going to buy my train ticket back. (He brought one for my brother though. ). I guess I can buy it myself, the only problem being that doing so will clear out my whole account. >.-


Yesterday, Heath invited me to go with him, David, Eric and Brandon to Hagerstown Mall (Hagerstown being in Maryland) Never went there, so I agreed and went over to David and Eric’s house, where everyone was going to meet up.

It was there that I was told that one of my good friends during high school is gay.

I was kinda surprised. He had a steady girlfriend for the last two years of highschool. They broke up a bit after we graduated, so yeah. *cough*andIkindasortahadahugecrushonhimfrom5th-till11thgrade*cough*

A bit disappointing, because he has a very pretty face (and very beautiful eyes *swoons*)

About two weeks ago I called his parents phone number, hoping that they didn’t move (They live on and operate a huge farm; I doubt his parents would have moved, but there was the possibility that he would have) Chances of chances, it was him that picked up the phone. We had a long talk, and I realized that we have a lot of the same tastes in common (When I was younger, I considered his taste in movies, for example, to be a bit eccentric)


Because David and Eric had to finish up yard work, we didn’t have enough time to go to Hagerstown, and instead went to Altoona.

The whole trip, David and Eric (by a vast margin, mostly David) made a lot of unnecessary gay jokes concerning above mentioned person and generally acted like his pea-sized brain was overthrown by his hormones and his penis combined, with all his constant talk of “hott babes in slutty clothing” (Which unfortunately seemed to describe just about every young female that walked across our path, either outside or in the mall itself)

I have to admit, his jokes about the gay stuff really shocked me, because he was making fun of someone he knew and hung out with since he was like three years old (Heath being the other one of the same description)

David readily admits to being homophobic, and made a big point in making sure that I couldn’t ever mistake him for being gay. (Like most times that he would joke around with Brandon, Heath or Eric, he would turn to me and make sure that I knew he was only joking around)

With all his gay jokes and commenting on every hott or barely clothed physically fit girl that was within his vision, for the first time ever, a good friend of mine really grated on my nerves. I wanted to tell him off or punch him in the arm good and hard or something like that, but I instead used a lot of energy in keeping my mouth shut. u_u

David, Eric and Heath do agree that their friend is living in sin and ect. But they still talk to him, so oh well.

Heath went with David and Eric’s family to the beach for a week starting today. When they come back, there’s only two days left for my stay here, not counting the day that I’m leaving, cause I’m prolly leaving early that day.


I’ve been plagued by my extreme allergic reaction to the stuffs inside the house (mold spores, dust) and outside stuffs (the huge field out front fosters and houses countless ragweed plants in full bloom >.< )

Being allergic to things makes me feel vulnerable and weak. (Feeling sick makes me feel the same way <.< ) Yeah, I know those are things that I can’t controle, but it is a tad unsettling that all someone has to do to do me in is make me eat a dish of eggplant and sesame seed paste (called Baba ganoue in Arabic), along with a glass of watermelon juice, set in the middle of a huge field full of various weeds in hard furious bloom. I don’t count medicines, cause how often would you encounter a medicine in the common that isn’t an OTC? And even then, medicines still don’t count, because it’s a chemical man-made type of thing. *shakes head*


My brother is coming back Wednesday. I have a feeling the rest of my stay here is going to go by very fast.

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Thursday, July 28, 2005

When the world spins 'round counter clock-wise
Being away from here, I've forgotten how this area is full of stuck-up shallow bratty snotrags who think they're better than you.

It's laughable, but after a while, it starts to get slightly annoying.

Just slightly. *raises eyebrow*


I feel immense liberation and relief, knowing that I am not trapped here to live forever. Not stuck in the backward hick-ness that heavily permeates too many of the people, who try to contaminate the area. Just an observer from the outside, untouchable. *grins happily*


Spent most of today with my mom, running errands with my car.

When things are ok between us, she pokes (mostly) good natured fun at me, and I make her laugh.

Either she's easy to make laugh, or I'm incredibly hilarious. <.<;;


For some reason, I was thinking today about how one time in high school, I was sitting in Spanish class when a revelation suddenly hit me during one of the teachers' ramblings: If a hermaphrodite was born in a predominatly Spanish speaking country, what verb tense would they use?



And now I must go, because my mom has went into her prying habit, where she stares over my shoulder, reading every single little thing that I type out, and yells at me when I type stuff like this paragraph.

I cant say I'm going to miss this part one bit. >:|



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