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You ever hear a song called 'Somebody told me' by The Killers?
I am drowning myself in that song.
And the cd by At The Drive In, called Relationship Of Command. I gave it a good listen last week, and I found I really really like most of the tracks on there.
Sucks to be the person I promised it to XD
I am really straining my self controle as of late. There are (not good/healthy) things I used to do (coughcuttingcough)to relieve extreme tension and stress. Temporary, and like I said before, not good or healthy.
Yes, I have stopped doing that for a while now. No, I dont have an alternative yet.
Whenever I get the urge to cut myself, I drown myself in my music, for distraction. I put myself so much into a song that I have to sing and move around, and I get some kind of high from it, from putting myself into the music.
My secret fear right now is that I am going to get sick of the music I am constantly listening to, and I wont be able to find replacement music.
When I say constantly listening to, I really mean it. If I wont get arrested/yelled at for listening to music at a high volume, I will do it.
I loves my headphones that my stupid cousine stole from me when I was asleep. I will kill him when I get home. =)
For reasons unapparent to me, stuff has started lately. I will be sitting around, listening to my cd player at a high volume, and I will start getting emotional, and I end up curled in a fetal position, shaking and crying. God am I pathetic. And boy do I know it. So shut up. >:|
I had to take the placement test at Hudson College today. I sucked so bad at the math that they asked me to come back again sometime next week, to retake it. I mean, for the reading part, I got a score that began with a 1 and ended with a 7, dont remember exactly now. The algebra score was something like 105, and the math score was 50.
Another thing to add to why I am disgusted with myself. I was never good at math =\
The rest of the time, I am all frustrated angry, with a lot of sad and spining out of controleness. Especially when I think. Eh heh heh.
I dont feel like doing random pointless facts today. Maybe tomorrow. *shrugs*
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