Time: 1:10 AM
Music: Million Tears
By: Groove Coverage
Mood: Addled, agitated, anxious, beside oneself, bothered, concerned, confused, crazed, crazy, discomposed, distracted, distrait, distressed, flustered, frantic, harassed, hysterical, mad, muddled, nonplussed, nuts, overwrought, perturbed, rattled, raving, shook up, thrown, tormented, troubled, unglued, unscrewed, unzipped, wild, worked up, and/or worried.
///Lyrics\\\
[Verse 1]
I wanna know where you belong
I wanna know why I sing this song
I tried to show how much I feel
Is that a dream or is it real?
I never look where you belong
Until I gotta sing my song
Is it a lie or is it true?
So many tears I've cried for you
[Chorus]
Woh ohh, a million tears for you
Wooho ohh, a million tears for you
Ohh, a million tears for you
Wooho ohh, a million tears for you
[Verse 2]
A million tears that I have cried
I wish you were right by my side
I tried to show how much I care
Beleive in me I will be there
I never knew where you belong
Whenever you just hear my song
Is it a lie or is it true?
So many tears I've cried for you
[Chorus]
Wooho ohh, a million tears for you
Wooho ohh, a million tears for you-ou-ou-ou...
///Lyrics\\\
*looks up at list of moods* Wow, that's a ton-o words, but in all honesty that's how I've felt over the past week or so. All of the above still seem to be lingering around.
I just got off of work, and I am dead tired. I worked yesterday and today until , midnight. Both days were quite nerve-racking and all that good stuff, but that's the price I have to pay to make good money.
Siris: *squirms in blankets*
Yesterday (Friday as my posts are always a fay behind), I broke down crying and I even woke up crying the next morning, but you know what the weird thing is? I have no earthly idea why...well, I did eventually come up with a few reasons:
1. The sudden realization that I am growing up; otherwise known as growing pains. I'm sixteen years old and finally have my first job, I'm soon to have my own car and pay for all my expenses, and on top of that I am going to be a junior in high school. Where did my life go? I mean, I can remember when I was in middle school waiting for the day when I would be older and have more freedom. They only thing I was forgetting was that with more freedom comes more responsibility. sometimes it's just really hard being a teenager, and sometimes I feel alone as most of the people I know aren't in the same boat as me and others just have it made for them and will end up having a hard time in life. I'm glad to be going through all of this, but it's hard to deal with.
Siris: *rolls over*
2. I'm lonely. I've also come to realize that there is a growing void claimly more and more of what was me and changing me into a different person. When I look at the world around me, I feel so alone. Everyone has felt this in some shape or form, but it tends to affect me more as I have this thrist for comfort and to be all-knowing. I feel as though I don't have anyone that really needs me or someone to protect. And so, it makes perfect sense. I'm one of those people that on the outside can seem so strong and distant at most times, but on the inside, I'm really screaming for someone to understand me and fill this void. And you know what, all of you should feel special because I've never told anyone that. Wow, that makes me seem like I have no friends when really I have the greatest friends in the world. I heart them dearly and know that their always there for me, alas I have a difficult time going to people and much rather rot in my own problems then burden them on others.^^
Siris: *kicks blankets off*
3. I don't know my parents anymore, and they don't know me. This problem has been increasing in the past few years as we've been through a lot. Most of it just happened to be bad causing us to grow apart. I used to be able to go to them for anything, but they barely comprehend my daily life, much less all the complications of my life. I tried to explain why I was upset to my mom, but she just give me a bunch of bullcrap stories and how it'll get better. Seriously, I'm not ten anymore, and I don't need to hear your life stories. They don't do anything for me. Then when she tells my dad about it, he'll give me the same talk in different words. So annoying. And always the few days after I'm upset my mom will accuse me of pouting and tell me to get a life. Seriously! I hate her so much sometimes. Two more years.
4. The final reason that I came up with is that it's hard watching someone's world fall apart, especially when you care about them dearly. You're basically watching them deteriorate before your eyes, and you don't know what to do and you don't know who to ask for help. 'Tis a sad thing.
Siris: *shivers*
Awr...*pulls blankets back up*
So today's Easter. I don't really even remember what the holiday's about. My family doesn't really get together because my parents are anti-social, but I don't really mind. I just get tired of hearing about everyone and what they do with their families. It just makes my family seem even more lame in comparison.
Happy Easter, guys. ^^ Hope you guys like white chocolate, because I've got e-white bunnies to hand out.
*hands out bunnies to commenters*
Siris: *mumbles* Ana ba-heb-bak...
--Lemony Slash
