Thursday, April 21, 2005

Late entrant to Mayoral Race promises: 'kindness to most mammals'
It seems I only ever post on here when I have the insane urge to complain about something, mainly maths, but complain none the less.

From this day onwards, Liam shall never complain on here again!

...pfft. Yeah, right. Like that's going to happen. lol.

Well, the study I did for my Life Science mid semester exam paid off. I believe I did quite well in it. Hooray for biology!

My chem mid semester marks were released yesterday as well, and I managed a cool 50%. Room for improvement is good, but not too much room, lol.

[EDIT: And we're back to continue as I finish attending my 8am life science lecture..]

I managed to resolve a crisis with my Chemistry practical. [all of which seem to be getting harder] It probably didn't help either that I forgot about it until Mayank reminded me yesterday while we were doing the maths assignment.

Study buddies are good. I'm just surprised that I'm helping them as much as they're helping me, especially with maths. I mean, when I don't understand something, they do, and when they don't, I do.

I mean, I finished the first half of the maths assignment, no problems, but I had difficulties with the latter half. It was the opposite for them and it all worked out good in the end ^_^

I just need to finish the last question and write it alllll up.

I currently have two Interpersonal Processes and Skills assignments to do over the next two/three weeks and another midsemester chem exam. Other than that, I have nothing else but study.

It's so incredibly tempting to throw all of this aside and play Morrowind, especially with the Bloodmoon expansion installed [thanks Ben!]. But I haven't. It also doesn't help that Neverwinter Nights is now available from Electronics Botique for $10.

At this point, the bonuses of being unemployed appear briefly...

...and then get swallowed up by the beckoning need for material gain...

lol

Another friend, Thuy, is hooked on an online game called 'Ragnarok Online,' and she's been extolling the virtues of it to me. Then I promptly tell her all about Morrowind, and Mayank just sits there and is excluded by the sheer wealth of nerdiness.

lol

I managed to catch up with the old skool free-stylin' rappers from the mountain side on Tuesday and played netball with them. Owing to my great height I was placed as GK, and then as GS for the second half. My lack of aggression was most unfortunate, as the match showed that Netball is not a dignified 'ladies sport.'

Lots and lots of aggression and tackling and people firing up. Most amusing for me, because half the time the ball was in the other half [we were beaten 30 something to 4], and I spent most of my free time talking to the opposite team's GS, Julie.

Mark [DJ ToKeN F3m/-\13] wants a big netball practice this Monday [Anzac Day], which I'm guessing will be filled with 'making Liam tap into is testosterone reserves to catalyse the beast within,' or something.

Or we could just be climbing trees and playing on the swings, like last time. lol.

I already have plans for Monday [Institute Lounge stuff], but I'm sure I can fit both in. Study and assignment work will have to take a hike, however, mainly because petrol is expensive and I need it for the trip back to the musical.

Speaking of trips, I did go to Tom Makim's funeral, and by some miracle, managed to make it back in time for my 3pm lecture. I ended up driving by myself there and back again, in my suit, as there wouldn't be time to get changed in Toowoomba.

To further complicate matters, I had to catch an early bus from Mark's house because I had stayed the night after netball.

In the end I ended up making it to St Pat's cathedral at 9:50am, the same time as Katy and 'toldi, so we went in together. Katy left to sit...somewhere...no doubt she'll say where later.

It was a good service, and I feel like an idiot for saying that because to describe a gathering of mourners as 'good' is a little redundant.

Needless to say, it was an adequate and appropriate service.

Mr Clarke had arranged a powerpoint session of photos of Tom, photos that made us laugh, made us think, but unfortunately reminded us of how much we lost in his decision.

The presentation was accompanied with some music of Tom's composition that showed his talent. It was almost melancholy, yet at the same time exciting. To me it left a feeling of neutrality. Others were crying during the presentation, which makes me feel as though I either didn't know him well enough and didn't deserve to be there, or that I have blocked my emotions so well that I simply didn't feel them, or even know I was blocking them.

Either case does not inspire much hope in me. Neutrality is my constant companion at funerals, which is a blessing as it gives me the opportunity to 'mourn with those that mourn,' while keeping a clear head and allowing me to comfort and focus on the other.

Blessing or a curse?

I don't know. I've never understood my emotions. I don't think I ever will, but I know that for some reason my mental gearing effortlessly brushes them aside when there's someone else that needs my attention.

I don't know what that makes me.

While we were gathering outside the cathedral, Mrs Christopherson came up to me and said hello. We talked for a while, at a rate that was appropriate for the situation, at a comfortable silence that was warm despite the busy traffic behind us. She then congratulated me on receiving the Phillipe Sambain Memorial Prize for Community Service, and to which I replied that I figured she was the one that had nominated me.

Never the less, I was still surprised when she said, 'well who else, Liam?'

Others may not find that quite as profound as I did, but given the context, it struck me as much to say, 'well? Who else, Liam? You do the job. You can't throw it aside. You don't let it be thrown. When your day comes, will you continue?'

Personal thought and inspiration can strike you at the oddest of times.

I shouldn't complain about these things. I accept it, but often I begrudge it. I often forget what I have done, through a sort of embarrassed modesty, I'm not sure. But by forgetting, I lose the internal support that you receive from having accomplished something.

After all, isn't it easier to attempt a task when you know that you have already completed it before?

I'm certain that those few of you that have read me frequently are now surprised at the deep and meaningful level of my discourse, to which I reply, 'who else, but Liam?'


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