Tuesday, November 1, 2005

hey

Well i forgot to wish yall a happy halloween >< wtf is wrong with me?? well happy late halloween.. hope your night was fun everyone. My night was boring, i ended up sleeping almost all day T_T i guess i was pretty tired. i never went to the mall!! GAHHHHH! lets see.. oh! only 3 trick or treaters came to my door.. some kids my age, i teased them and gave them one peice each, then i 'accidently' spilled some all over the ground.. and seriously.. they picked ip every peice... haha. Then 2 kids came, and one was dressed as a french artist, you know with the whole hat and painting board and stuff.. and he even said trick or treat in french.. it was awesome. And then this little girl that was only like..5 came and she was SOO CUTE she was dressed as batman... aww.. it was cute.. Then some teens decided to ruin my night and came up knocking and kicking on my door.. then they ran away.. It sucked. Tommarrow.. hopefully will be a nice day.. Megan just got on me about not hanging with her at lunch today and Honestly, its becuase i went home at lunch.. cause i dont have any classes after lunch. But also becuase i dont really feel like seeing them... all well. So i guess thats about it.. lol.. Ill try and visit some of you today but if i dont.. im sorry.. ok? Love ya!

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Monday, October 31, 2005

Hey

Well, Since ive been bothering my parents with this whole 'ferret' thing theyre all "Hey how about a rabbit?" and im all "Hell yes!" cause last month i asked for a bunny and they said no.. lol.. I KNOW HOW THEYRE MINDS WORK NOW HAHAHAHA. Im a bit hyper.. i dont know why.. it may have been the toast i just had... or tons of Sweettarts ive eaten today.. I was supposed to go to the mall but football was on and my dad refused to take me >< damn him... damn football... Damn YOU TOM FELTON FOR BEING SO FRIGGIN SEXY. ..........dont look at me that way.. So.... umm.. *trys to calm down* Tomarrow(technically today i guess) im supposed to go to the mall with my mom, her friend, and her friends daughter.. so yeah..yey.. i get to blow all my money >< i really wish they would call me and give me hours back at my job.. i hate bieng poor. My scanner was being mean today. I tried to scan a picture of my cousin cause he asked me to but it wouldnt work.. so i think i may have to reinstall the whole program.. and i cannot FIND THE DISK. i put it as well as all the other important cds inside this white case, so that they would be safe and not get lost >< Smart right? yeah...thats why it got lost anyway.. GRRR its been rainy and cold.. which sucks because i was planning on going out and trick or treating..cause i want candy... if they ask me what i am i can be all "What do you think i am?" teehee... but i dunno.. i think ive had enough candy already.. *scarfs down the rest of the packs of sweettarts* Ok so unlike many of you(yes i have been visiting you guys, i just havent been commenting..sorry) i didnt get invited to any nice halloween party or anything like that..so my weekend sucked... all well lol. well Have a nice day!

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Sunday, October 30, 2005

hey

Hey ya'll.. guess what? i want a ferret. I swear, im not kidding, i want a ferret and i want to name it DRACO. i want it to be a white ferret..maybe ill dye it green..no.. then it would be odd... a while ferret.. thats good.. And a duck... a ferret and a duck.. I dunno what ill name my duck. Anyway i just got done watching 'the Ammityville horror" no i dont know how to spell it.. but yeah it wasnt scary..it wasnt like the book or the older movie either.. :/ all well. the only part that got some emotion out of me(rather then total boredom) was when he totally took the axe to the dog.. cause it sucks when animals dye... Well i think its time for me to be getting on the whole permit thing.. i still need to study up on that damnit >< Oh and i think ill keep trying this whole highschool thing.. i mean i cant honestly say by my senior year, i probobly wont have all the credits i need.. but you know what? i realised that im falling back into my deppressed state.. and thats not good. If i were to leave highschool, that would give me a chance to just cut myself off from the world totally.. and who knows what i would have done you know? So i gotta make sure to be happy and not think of the bad things.. however this whole ordeal has taught me that whats happened has happened and i cant try to change it! if i dont have friends.. fine.. i need to stop trying to please people and make my life perfect and stuff. So anyway.. tommarrow im hoping to go to the new Outlet mall that my town has. Our movie theatre was moved there.. which pissed me off cause i like where our movie theatre was.. I thought my cat was going to have her kittens today becuase she was acting funny and not sitting directly down. but then nothing happened to i examined her and found a very long thorny stick tangled into her fur and against her stomach and going all the way around to her backside so im guess that was the problem.. umm.. well thats all i guess.. NO ONE IS ONLINE AGAIN GOD DAMNIT!! serously.. its like so boring when all my online friends are off.. but i have nothing to do so i stay on despite my boredness >< ANIME is on tonight.. but i havent watched anime for like.. months.. which sucks but all well.. i guess i should start watching it again cause i love it but it seems like such a hastle even when i have nothing to do.. isnt that stupid? well.. umm.. random question: have you ever made up a story.. even just in your head? i used to make up storys in my head to try to get myself to sleep..it never worked cause i would get so engrosed into the story lol.

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Saturday, October 29, 2005

O.o

Wow, no one at all is online on my YIM list.. which really sucks. Ok so ummm... I stayed up really late, till like 4 or 5 in the morning and so mom let me sleep in <<;; and then i went to sculpture. so ....yey.. i guess.. Well ive decided to re-write the very first fanficion i ever wrote. Im re-writing it out of Fanfic form, because i totally wrote a sequal to it already and the sequal is so good! Anyway its up on this site: foresakenangel.proboards19.com As well as all my fanfics.. teehee. So, as i said no one is on and no one has been on so im so bored.. and kind of sad now *sniffle* Well, thats all i really have to say..i know..im so boring lately..

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Friday, October 28, 2005

ok

Sorry for the lack of updating.. havent had much to say... Umm... so tommarrow were doing masks in sculpture.. my ideas can all be found on the internet.. But i dont want to go back to google and looks for them... >< ill show them later. So umm... yeah.. im not liking my hair, it doesmt go in and out.. so i dont think my hairstylist layered it very well O.o damnit. im thinking of cutting it real short.. lol.. i wonder how shocked my parents would be if i cut my own hair! Welllllll.... the weekend is almost here..yeyness. ummmmmm.... yeah thats about it yall sorry for my lack of..er.. being around i guess.. i havent posted on many of your sites and im sorry for that.. love ya's.

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Monday, October 24, 2005

..

Hi.. well today wasnt interesting.. i didnt really do anything at all.. On monday(i guess thats the day it is technically) i dont have school because its a teacher work day..whoot Um...not much to say.. hopefully i will have my job back within 2 weeks... if not..well..im going to be pretty deppressed lol.... ummmm... new pic of me! ill put it on the bottom.. actually i have a few things to show you so i will put pics of all of them on the bottom lol. well yeah.. nothing much to say i guess.. click on the thumbnails to view them in bigger size.. see ya! an avatar bg i made for my myspace: My sculpture heads: Me:

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Sunday, October 23, 2005

HAHAHA

~i got this off someones myspace and thought it was the funniest thing ever..

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Ok

Ok, well my sister said that if i honestly dont have a chance and i feel its the right thing to do.. then maybe i should.. And i didnt even have to tell my mom....she actually suggested the whole GED thing to me even though thats already what was on my mind. I of course cant drop out till im 16.. and thats not till next semester. But thats fine.. it will give me time to think, becuase its deffinatly not for sure, i dont know if i have the guts to tell my dad or not... Today i had to cancel my hair appointment becuase i didnt have a ride >< i really want my haircut damnit! Today was ok.. we are like so out of food its not even funny and my dad only has 50 dollars for food for this whole week so i must try and get cheap things for dinner. (This is another reason i should get ANOTHER job..) Lol, were even out of top ramen damnit!!! I just sat around all day watching the most scariest places on earth marathon and got a huge headache.. In sculpture were starting masks, i of course want some japanese related, maybe gaisha-like. but i want some anceint japanese traditional-like.. however i dont know exactly.. i want it to look kool and refect me.. << >> i shall have to go and do some research.. google is of cours my number one sourse teehee.. thats about it my Hunibuns(can you tell im in a better mood?) See ya!

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Saturday, October 22, 2005

Ok

Well.. nothing much to say... life sucks as usual... no one is online... i havent talked to ivory for like a week... The only good thing about this week is that i finished my book 'the subtle knife' and i went straight intothe next one. i love this series but my sister told me the end would be sad.. and im dreading reaching it. I almost cried at school while reading it cause(and you will not understand what im gonna say next) LEE DIED OMG AND SO DID ALL THE WITCHES AND WILLS FATHER RIGHT AFTER WILL MET HIM GOD DAMN THAT WITCH FOR HATING HIM AND NOW LYRA HAS BEEN CAPTURED BY HER EVIL MOTHER AND DOESNT HAVE THE ALEITHEOMETER CAUSE ITS WITH WILL AND APPARENTLY EVERYONE NEEDS TO BE ON LYRAS FATHERS SIDE AND I HATE HIM CAUSE HE KILLED ROGAR.. they have angels in the book.. quite wonderful creatures they are in the book.. they are light, they dont have flesh and they go where they are needed. they fascinate me in this book... and what he pretends heaven and hell to be.. wow i literally love these books, even if they are sad.. im just sad that the series is almost over for me now.. however.. i still have 500 more pages to read and im quite satisfied with that lol. i got my paycheck the other day.. 66 dollars and i just spent 10 and im about to spend 25 and then i am going to try and save the rest becuse im still out of work for awhile and that really sucks. neon genisis came on.. and i didnt realise it till the very end... DAMNIT. well.. my weekend will be depressing im assure you... On another note, i wish people would simply understand what im coming at about teh dropping out of school. I have never done good in school, all its braught is shame and loneliness. honestly all my life school has been hard to keep my grades up, its been hard to make friends, i have tried so hard to do better in school every year, im tired of trying and failing. I honestly can feel that its time for me to move on and grow up a little more. As much as i hate to say it, my teen years will not be so wonderful, and i wont have many good memories, but not everyone can have good memories of highschool. my plan if i do drop out, get another job(because my current one just isnt cutting it) and save up.. help out my dad you know.. and when im 18 i want to go to college like my sister and get my GED. You see, she didnt pass highschool and now she is fixing it. i dont know if this will all fall through i cant be sure of it, but i can only hope.. becuase i dont want to see my class gradaute in 3 years without me.. and i would have stayed at that school for nothing. i dont know how much more pain i can let it give me before i once again break down altogether.. and who knows what i will do then.. Im sorry im such a downer right now.. i guess that explanation was as much to you as it was to me.. lol.. i dunno you guys.. i just hope i have someone to come to if i do drop out.. im so scared of the future and im so scared of what to do. i always seem to make the wrong move.. and this may seem like a wrong move.. but it honestly seems like the right move this time. im an idiot though... watch me screw up my life lol.. just great.

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Thursday, October 20, 2005

...

I dont have much to say today... nothing really happened today eccept i didnt go to school.. Codey is pissing me off becuase i told him i was thinking about dropping out and he is saying how stupid it is and arguing with me about GED's and blah blah blah.. and im really not in a good mood right now.. at all.. im really tired of listening to people bullshit and i just feel like..punching a mirror or something. like.. seriously.. im litterally shaking cause im so annoyed and stressed out. Im tired of always being alone and my online friends always say "well you have me" but thats not what i mean and as much as i love my online friends its not like there actually here and everything so its just not the same.. i want to cry.. but i cant seem to.. anyway.. ignore deppressed little me.. im in a shity mood right now and i understand if you guys are friggin tired of hearing about all this.

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