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Sunday, August 21, 2005


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Im feeling like shit. Im so scared of this year.. this past week has really hit hard.. and im feeling more alone then ever. my sister is leaving in about 6 hours.... Im stuck here alone with my father and mother untill next year.. great.. and school starts on monday.. and im so scared that i will have no one at all to be with in that school. Im feeling more cut out of the world then i ever have before. I even feel like all my online friends are losing interest in me.. Like.. maybe they wont be there for me either soon... and i dont want to break down becuase of it.. but i feel so cornered right now.. what the hell do i do?! what the hell did i do?

I like myself, i do. But its hard to keep liking myself when it feels like everyone else in the world hates me. Its hard to get up in the morning, when you wonder, why are you getting up anyway? no one really wants to see you, its not like you have any plans..

A lot of my friends say theyre afraid to be alone. And all i have to say is, they should be.. becuase its scary.. and hard.. i would know.

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