Monday, February 4, 2008

   Back to the Angelic Smiley! ^_^
Hey everyone, not sure how many people are actually going to read this, but I'm posting anyway. I figure that I'm fine but still have some stuff on my mind... which I have been praying will end up all right in the end. I'm definitely not optimal, but I'm definitely hopeful. ^_^

So school's ok. Still trying to pull super-A's, but enough about that... things are going well for the most part and that's what counts, ne? O.o ... o.O

Hmmmm, nothing much else to say... except perhaps... for one of my best friends: (I hope my friend knows that I'm talking to the one I'm referring to...) I'm sorry for the way I acted. I can say that I was pretty down and hysterically depressed during that time, but there's no excuse for going on without apologizing. I hope we can still be friends, though I won't force you to if you really don't care to continue our friendship. But I'm truly sorry and hope that we can end this chapter on good terms... please come back? ^_^'

Alrighty, if you read that last paragraph and don't think it refers to you, it probably doesn't... I'm sorry, just my choice of communication I suppose... nvm, idk... XP

Okies, well I hope everyone had a fine Monday and will have an equally fine or even better rest of the week!!! ^_^

~ LB ~

RANDOM FACT OF THE DAY

When the word "dandy" first came into common use, it was used to describe a man who could be considered to have good fashion sense as well as be a men's fashion authority.

(perhaps I shall do this at least once a week from now on... hmmmmm.....)
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Sunday, January 27, 2008

   I just don't feel upbeat anymore...
I don't feel well about anything right now. I'm staying up later than I should, and I feel stupid because I'm allowing myself to be hurt by things that are in the past. Yeah, a lot of things are my fault, and everything I've done I can't take back. But for that reason, I just want to keep punishing myself until I feel like I can actually forgive myself... which will never happen... I know I'm going to regret saying this, but I wish I had lived somewhere else... then I wouldn't have a hurt a lot of people... I'm sorry for not logging on for the past couple of days, even when I said I would... I think I'll just go, I'm not feeling well...

~ LB ~
PS -- sorry for not visiting your sites... I'm just not in the mood for anything...
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Thursday, January 24, 2008

Nothing to add today...

~ LB ~
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Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Gomen...
Sorry I haven't been on today. Just wasn't in the mood earlier... still not in the mood, but yeah... idk, I probably won't be in the mood for a while. Oh well, I'll still be on I suppose.

~ LB ~
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Tuesday, January 22, 2008

   First Day of Semester ... not a good omen... T_T
It was snowing this morning (which I REALLY love)! XD XD XD ... Problem: roads were TERRIBLE! ... Got to school late because of traffic. XP But thankfully, my teacher is somewhat laxed and let me off the hook... I just had to take the attendance down. ^_^' And I found out the rest of my semester grades for last semester... breakdown (if anybody cares):

Physics -- A ... XD
Latin 3 -- super A ... XD
Honors English 11 -- super B ... :\
AP Biology -- super B ... T_T
Chemistry -- A :)
Honors Pre-Calculus -- super A :)

I don't want to sound like I'm bragging though... I guess I'm just venting... I had 3 super As first quarter and ended up with only 2 for the semester... Yesh, I'm taking 3 science classes this year... geek, I know ^_^'

Ah well... so how was everyone else's day? Moy bien? Pessimum? O.o ... o.O ... Either way, I hope everyone has a great evening! ^_^

~ LB ~
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Monday, January 21, 2008

   Boring today...
Hello. 'Tis a boring day today. But I had no school, so LB est fine. ^_^ Nothing to say really. Just trying to get back into the habit of logging in and posting... I miss this place. Ah well, perhaps tomorrow I shall have something interesting to say. ^_^ ttfn!

~ LB ~
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Sunday, January 20, 2008

   The Birdie Has Returnedie!!! ^_^
Ok, so I wanted to make it rhyme... ah well, failed again... -_-' ... but anyways, I've got a lot to talk about since the last time I logged on. First off... I'm so sorry for not being around as often. Junior year is just so stressful... and busy. LB is lucky to find a makeshift nest to nap in... T_T But I art okies! ^_^

Secondly... HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!! XD XD XD XD XD XD XD XD ... ^_^'

Thirdly, if you've been to GhostlyNinja's site recently (aka: Josh), you already know this, but... WE'RE TOGETHER AGAIN!!! <3 and honestly, because we broke up, I think we're doing better than ever. ^_^ I hate that we went through all that emotional crap and mental breakdowns and such, but if that means making our bond stronger, then press on!!! *fight face* HIYA!!! XD ... ^_^'

And lastly, every day life... exams just ended this week. I already got a super-B in English for the semester (which is technically an A, but it looks like a B on my report card... whatever, if it looks like a B, then it's still a B! XP ). Everything else looks good, so I think I'm going to get a super boost in my GPA... ah, who cares what my GPA is? (I do, but I mean on here... I know you guys don't want to listen to my rambling about grades and what-not, right? O.o ... o.O ) And so, a new semester begins... and college tests... XP I took a few last year, but this is the year it really counts, so... FIGHTO!!! XD ... maybe this whole college thing is really starting to get to me... I think I'll stop before I start talking about more school stuff... XP

So, how has everyone been? I'm sorry I haven't been visiting, but I'll try to visit as many people as possible, okies? ^_^ Alrighty, talk to you guys soon!!!

~ LB ~
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Sunday, November 11, 2007

   My Longest Depression Since Sixth Grade...
If you have been reading GhostlyNinja's posts in the past couple months, you already know that we're no longer a couple...

When we broke up, I thought, "This is for the best. If we can't get any happier than this when we're together, then the only way for Josh to be happier is if we split..." ...
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Now, I find myself trying to cling to him. I love him so much, and I didn't really realize how much until he was gone... when I found out that he might like this other girl, I was completely crushed... that whole week, it felt like he truly loved me and me alone... I never doubted for a second that he loved ME... now he loves me, and maybe someone else... what kind of a relationship is that...?
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I find myself swinging between 3 songs: "Gotta Go My Own Way" and "When There Was Me and You" (both from the High School Musical franchise) and "Big Girls Don't Cry" by Fergie... at times, I want Josh to get as far away from me as possible because I'm afraid of hurting him again... and then, I want to hold onto him, fall into his arms and just stay there forever... but it feels like he's never there to catch me... but then again, it's not like he's obliged to...
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My heart is just so fragile nowadays... in these days of childhood, my heart was only made of glass... I gave my heart for him to hold, but we dropped it... and it shattered... and every time I try to glue the pieces back together, something happens, and it slips out of my hands again... and shatters into more pieces... it's getting so much harder trying to find all the pieces... and I'm running out of glue... I could wait for him forever, but the hurt only gets worse...
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I'm almost not afraid at all to say I love him over the phone when someone else is listening... I don't even try to say it in a different language... I love him so much... but I don't want to tie him down... I don't want to pull him away from his dreams... even if he loves me, I don't want to be the reason for keeping him from reaching his goals...
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This is all sad talk, I know, and I also know that people have other things to worry about that are at a greater magnitude than a little heartbreak... this is just the only place I feel comfortable posting things like this...
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please pray for me, everyone...

~ LB ~
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Sunday, November 4, 2007

SHOUT OUT TO ANYONE WHO CARE!!! ^_^
I FEEL CRUSHED!!!!!!! XD Ok, so this guy that I really, really, REALLY like might like his best friend as more than a friend. He made it clear to me for the past, like, 2 months that they are "just friends". And then today, I asked him if he likes her, and he's like "I don't know..." HAH!!! THAT MEANS YES!!! ^_^

Yeah, so I feel like a complete fool right now, because I thought we might still have a chance... This whole entire week, I was bubbling with joy just because of that thought... but nope, I was a wrong fool and deserve to feel this way! ^_^ I want to go cry right now, but I can't because I'm WAY too tired!!! XP

So he says he still loves me, but it's like, "Um, how can you love me and think you like this other girl?" I mean really! If you really love someone, then that means there's NO ONE ELSE!!! Yeah, I live by that philosophy. You can't love two people like that! It's impossible!!! XD

Yeah, so I'm gonna stay outta his way for the rest of the week until he comes home... besides, who wants to talk to a foolish loser like me...? ^_^

~ LB ~
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Friday, July 20, 2007

   I Wish I Could Post Vids at School... XP
Oh well... ^_^ ... TODAY'S ME LAST DAY AT SUMMER SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD So for the rest of my summer (which isn't a lot), I'll be spending my mornings sleeping in and my afternoons doing summer reading for my Honors English class next year!!! ... ... ... ... T_T ... at least there's no 600 page book this year... that was sressful... ^_^' My books this year are:

1) Pride and Prejudice
2) A Tale of Two Cities
3) Heart of Darkness

Two of them are romances and the last one is more of a psychological story... it sounds creepy... o_o' ...

Anyways, I have a question... Does anyone know where I can view Sailor Moon S 29??? Last time I checked YouTube, I couldn't get it in Japanese... ^_^' If anyone can help me, I'd be very happy! ^_^

Okies, well, I gots to go now... T_T ... it okies though! ^_^ Enjoy this wonderful Friday everyone!!!

~ LB ~
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