Monday, May 30, 2005

   A lot of fucking shit has happened

First off Thursday (Andy's graduation) My mom took me and my friend to his graduation and it was a long ways and shit. So anyways we was standing there watching and I sit on an ant bed (it fucking hurt!!) Well I walk to the bathroom and this guy goes hey mandy and I look at him and have no idea who he was at first then it clicked. Oh my gah its Dustin my ex (only dated for a day) Andys brother. He goes..Mandy I really need to tell you something..I said Okay hold on I really need to go to the bathroom. So I go in there and make sure no ants got in my pants and they didnt. Well I walk outside and go..hey what did ya need to tell me...he looks down all sad and stuff and he goes...Well you know that Britney girl..I go...uh..yeah..He goes well Andy is breaking up with you for her... I was like... oh..Well then I guess I am going to go then...He goes...Why I said...Well there really isnt any reason for me to be here anymore..He goes...Yeah there is just stay..so I said okay I will I guess and he goes...lets take a walk...I said okay..So me him and Marlena start walking and I tell him about the ants in my pants and he cracked a joke and said..here lemme get them for you and goes to slap my butt and I go..Naw I'm good..Then I spot Micheal Ashley and he runs over there to him and told me to come but I just walked over to my mommma. We stood there talking and Dustin comes over and grabs the back of my neck (which I cant stand it tickles) and he goes..see I know just the spot to get her...and my mom goes..Yeah but she knows the guys weak spots too..and I turn red and go OMG MOM!! and start to walk off. lol..Well anyways Andy finally comes up there and goes... I was going to tell you last night but I couldnt Im sorry..and Im like well explain yourself...and hes like..blahblah it just happened I dono how it did..blahblahblah bull shit..and he goes..Are you mad at me? and I go..No I dont care..THEN he goes..Well are we still going to be friends or..not..I go I dono..and then after awhile I walk off to leave and Dustin goes.."Hey mandy" and does that head nod thing..and I turn around and go "What?" and he goes.."Come here" so I did and he gave me a big hug. He even told Andy he was pissed off at him because he broke up with me. lol..oh well *sighs* Then after that we left and I went to marlenas house and shed one tear, and I had a great time at her house. I smoked weed..hah..and ate it..it was...fun..but Marlena doesnt do that stuff it was her cousin heather and me. Then this guy called Johnathon Able came over right after and then he came over last night and Marlena and Heather fell asleep so me and him talked like 10 minutes after that and he left.. OMG..He is such a deep thinker and puts things in great perspective, and he like.. I dono..Is such a sweet heart..Heather(the 14 yr old who had the baby which she is 16 now) needed a cell phone and he is buying her one and she didnt want him too, he loans money out to anyone who needs it (even my brother...which my brother owes him 60 for beer cause his wife called the cops on them and they had to poor it out, and 20 for speakers to go in his tranzam) omg ... I dono ... I dont like him because he is a shallow person and would never date anyone like me..hah..who needs him.. Well now I am home and I talked to Alicia, and her and Andy might be getting back together *sad sigh* I knew that would happen but oh well.. And then I hear she fucked a 30 yr old guy..omg..well anyways I guess I am going to go and mope around and never sleep because I am so depressed *cries*

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Wednesday, May 25, 2005

   *SiGh* =\

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v337/CastingShadows/butterfly.gif I..dono.Andy told me he loved me yesterday the thing is I was at Alicias house talking to him, and thats his ex, and he dated her for like 6mths. I felt as though he was only saying it to make her jealous. Especially after I called him when I got home and we talked and at the end of the convo he says "This feels weird telling you this but..I love you." of course both times I returned his love..but hey..Bull Shit is an 8 letter word too! That is how I feel!! I feel like he is bull shitting when he says 'i love you' tomorrow is his graduation. I must confront him about this before that. I need to tell him how I feel, and he needs to explain it too me. I must know if he truly loves me. He makes me happy, since I have been with him I havent cut myself I havent cried but one tear. He completes my soul and heart. And I fear if I lose him I might just break inside and .. possibly .. die. I just love him so much!! Well Im going to go...*sighs*

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Tuesday, May 24, 2005

   FINALLY!!!

Well Alicia and Melissa checked me out of school today. Thank God. I was about to go crazy!! Well anyways!! I talked to Andy at Alicias today. Yeah she was totally flirting with him *steam blows out of her ears* grrrr..Anywho she FINALLY gave me the phone and I go.. "Yeah so..was that Britney King that came down with you." He was like "Yeah" I said "Yeah I thought that was her." he goes "I'm sorry for hugging her, I was just trying to get her wet. I wasnt thinking about it when I did it. But after wards I was like oh shit shouldnt of done that." I said "Yeah well I just walked off before I could say anything." I also asked if they was friends and everything and he said yeah they was. Well they are like exs so yeah..grrr. Tomorrow is my last day of school then its summer WOO HOO. The 27th is Andys Graduation and I'm going of course. HeHe I totally can not wait. I hope it isnt too hott, because I usually always wear long sleeves. lol. yeah I am punk and I dont like showing my arms..erm. Anyways... OMG!!!! Andy told me he loved me finally. But the funny thing is that he told me when I was at Alicias house...HUMMMM...Intresting..Does he really make me out to be a fool. Hmmm..Well Anyways I know I love him and thats that.. Oh, theres this drink at GMC in the mall, that you drink it for 2 days and your suppose to sip on it for 4 hours and not eat anything at all but the drink and your suppose to exercise. You do it 2 days a week, and you drop 10ilbs. So, I'am going to try that this summer. Brooke said that it works cause she tried it. So I hope it works on me cause I wanna weigh 130 or 140ilbs. I have a long weighs to go hahahaha. Well I hope I do I wanna be skinny for prom :D. -Vampiress

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   At school...damnit

Omg I'am so pissed off. I want to check out but marlenas mom wont call back up here. So before we go to lunch she is oing to call her again. And if her mom hasnt gotten ahold of anyone than I'm calling my mom back and telling her that I'm not checking out because my ride out of school isnt comming. Omg this is so not fucking cool. OH YEAH. Andy came down to trade school today like always, but this time he brought his ex g/f Britney King down with him. Omg I was so fucking pissed off I just walked off and he just talked to his ex. It was like well...fuck you too bitch. God!! Anyways Ill write back later. -Vampiress

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Monday, May 23, 2005

   OMG GREAT NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Andy and I are together now!! AHHH (girly squel) I was talking to him on the phone and Marlena is like "Tell him Mandy!" and he goes "Tell me what?" and I go "I cant tell you because your going into the Navy straight after school, and your getting drunk you might get laid, and I mean we're friends it would be so wrong." and he goes "Well I might not get drunk, and I'm not going straight into the Navy, so tell me." Well anyways after 5 minutes of that I hand the phone to Marlena and she tells him and he goes "Well I've known that for a long time now, give her the phone I want to hear her say it." So she gave me the phone and it took me awhile but I told him I liked him and he goes "Well I knew that, I like you too..so where do you wanna go with this." And I'm like omg how embarrassing. So I said "I want to go to the moon.." and he says "Sorry to break it to ya but the moon isnt made of cheese." I go "OMG IT ISNT!!! That ruins every thing :(" Well I had to go so I got off the phone w/o giving him an answer. Then I call him from my cousins. She was having a party and had a lot of people over there. Well Marlena was talking to his sister, and his sister was asking all sorts of questions about me, then Andy got on the phone and Marlena goes "Do you want to go out with Mandy?" and he said "uhm...well yeah." So yeah we are dating!!! Anyways about this weekend. Friday Marlena and I went to Rachaels party, and this guy dude named maison or something like that grabbed our butts (omg he grabbed my mommas butt too, shes like 45!) Grabbed Marlenas boobs and dirty danced on me like I was a pole. Then we left there around 10pm, and was getting totally paranoid about this car with one headlight following us. I mean all the way from Rachaels house so my mom pulled into the store and it went on. Talk about scariness lol. Then we got to Marlenas house, my mom left, and Marlena and I partied, like dancing and stuff. Then saturday we went to this girl named Erin, birthday party, then came home to a party, and I got a little drink of Smirnoff Triple Black. It was good!! Anyways, then I came home yesterday. That was my weekend :D!! I only have to go to school tomorrow and the next day then I'm like totally out for summer vacation. *WOOO HOOO* May 27th I'am going to Andys graduation. hehehe. Marlena is comming too lol. I can not wait!! Well anyways, I gotta go and wait for muh baby to call. -Vampiress

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Thursday, May 19, 2005

   ALMOST FRIDAY YAY!!!

Today we had Field Day at Trade School. Well we decided to chill in COSMO. For a little while before we had to leave. I see Micheal Ashley outside, so im like 'hmm andy must be somewhere around here' then I see him walk pass the door so I run outside and go "HEY!" and he goes "There you are." and comes into COSMO doing the "Mission Impossible Theme song" crouched down OMG IT WAS HILLARIOUS. You gotta love him he is so funny. AND Marlena thinks Micheal is really cute. lol...Yeah tomorrow I plan on taking Andy aside and going "So..What do you think about Marlena?" lol its going to be fun. I really dont want to go to Rachaels party because I mean I wont know hardly anyone there, plus I will feel a tad bit outta place. But oh well I'm going because shes my cuz and all. Maybe anyways. Marlena likes Bruce..hehehe...She thinks I like Andy, but I dont think I do. I like him as a friend and nothing more. Yes at one point and time I did like Andy more than a friend. But now its just.. I dono .. I just love to hang around him because he makes me happy. Which yeah my nick name is giggles and I giggle about everything. But he makes me feel happy, not just laugh lol. 2 days till summer for me. I only have to take one test most likely. Prolly the Math test. AND I might have to take the Marketing test I dono. I might have to because the teacher dont like me. But thats fine I dont like hime either..hahaha. Wow..I just realized..Andy is graduating this year..and then going straight to the Navy..I'am going to totally miss seeing him like almost everyday at trade school, and talking to him on the phone..Wow..And even though him and Alicia isnt together..I miss going over there every weekend with her...I think I am going to cry :'(.. Well I gotta go call muh peeps. lataz -Vampiress

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Wednesday, May 18, 2005

   Pretty Good Day..Miracle!

Today has been a better day. No bad luck what so ever. Except for in Marketing class the teacher really pissed me off so I said "This Pisses me off" and he goes "Excuse me" and I told him "I said this pisses me off. It isnt a bad word even the teachers use it." and he goes "It is when its said to me." And I said "I wasnt directing it towards anyone, I was just saying it." and he goes "Thats what I thought I didnt think you was that stupid" and I almost said "If I was going to say it to you. You would know because I would be in your face cussing you out." But I held my tongue on that one. Its almost the end of school so I have to hold my tongue lol. I made the highest score on the Writting Assesment Test thingy we took. I scored a 4 with 8pts, Only Tiffany Pitts made that too. I felt so proud of myself :D. Andy and Alicia have officially broke up. And now Alicia is with Jesse. The guy that played her when she got drunk, fucked her, and was only doing it so she and Andy would break up. That totally pisses me off. But it makes her happy so yeah. I got invited to my cousin Rachaels party. She invited 19 guys, and is sending out 60 invites. So I asked Marlena to go with me so I wont feel so lonely lol. Well I guess I have to go now because Jennifer and Barry is visiting and Jen needs the phone, And I need to call Andy because he told me too. I doubt I will get back on..so Lata -Vampiress

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Tuesday, May 17, 2005

   BAD FUCKING DAY!

It all started off when I was walking towards my moms car, I got right near it and she leaves me, Cause she "didnt see me" HELLO REAR VIEW MIRROR!, Then I get home (after being at school for a friggin hour) and my button on my pants is about to come off, then I slam my head inside the fridge door, as in it was open my head was against the other side and the door slamed it between the two sides! Then I find black stuff on my pants, then my mom says that she feels like she is going to have a heart attack, then my best friend told me last night that she didnt wanna be with her boyfriend anymore and I offered to tell him that, and she said okay, we can after you get home from school, well I dont lie to my friends, its fucking hard, I see him at trade school and he gets it out of me, WELL I come home today, and she fucking says that she doesnt wanna break up with him, FUCK IF YOUR HAVING DOUBTS WHY BE WITH THE PERSON!!! GOD!!!! Then just walla go I burned my fucking arm with cabbage juice..YES CABBAGE JUICE OF ALL FRIGGIN THIGNS..So now I have a big red friggin burn mark.. GOD!!! *breaths then yells incoherent thigns* So yeah today has been really fucking fucked up. OH YEAH I FORGOT, one of my friends is trying to pick a fight with one of my other friends, so yaeh its been so fucking bad okay BAD BAD BAAAAAAAAAAD!!! I have fucking anger managment problems, I can not take shit like this, I will fucking blow up at someone for no god dang reason, That and I have emotional problems, I am about to have an emotional breakdown just like the saturday before mothers day I had an emotional break down followed by a Panic Attack, right now its taking all I have to night faint, Im breathing in 5secs, breathing out 5 secs. I am about to have a panic attack, this is too much stress for me. Well I gotta go and call Andy and tell him that Alicia isnt going to break up with him, and prolly have a worse fucking day! Pics of Me- Normal me "Yeah I know im ugly.." Punk me(lol) "like my eye make-up ^-^ haha..this was in my bathroom" Yes im fat and ugly but I dont give a freaking fuck!

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Monday, May 16, 2005

   Bittersweet Day..

I don't know .. what to feel right now really .. one of my best friens aunts dad died today.. and she cried all day long.. I made her smile 10 times... but I dont think it was good enough.. I guess smiles can never cover up the pain of death, because as soon as the smile fades, the pain comes back...*sighs* She took me and my other friend home today, took almost 2 hours, but she thanked me for getting things off of her mind, *sighs* but then it was a good day because it was the talent show, so we all had fun there too, screaming and WOOOING and clapping, so yeah my throat is kinda hoarse..lol.. I have no writting spurt at the moment, but most likely I will later tonight so I can begin one of those stories. *sighs* I think I will go now and go to my room, play my guitar and make a sad song, its a depressing day..but joyous at the same time..hah..funny how that is..huh? -Vampiress

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   Tiredness

I'm very sleep..its 11:36pm, I have to get up at 5:30am to get ready for school. Hah...Anywho I have decided to write 2 stories. One is going to be Anime-Fantasy mixed with romance the other is going to be an Indian Romance. The anime one is gonna be about.. This 17 year old girl parents die when she was 8, she is haunted by her past, because she saw her parents be murdered. All her life she has sought revenge on the evil monster that killed her parents. She went to live with her very rich uncle, that lives in Japan. She lives in this huge mansion, and trains her fighting skills every day since she was brought there. Well one day she finds this unique jewel and looks into it wishing she was somewhere other than there because she was having a hard time. Then suddenly she is in some other world, with unknown creatures, and magic. The adventure starts from there. The indian romance-This young girl around 12 and her father comes to the plains. One day a young indian boy appears there. The girl and boy met, and its love at first sight. As soon as their parents know about the meeting they forbid each other from seeing one another. Well the boy sneaks from camp and goes to see the girl. His father finds out and the whole tribe moves else where. 6 years past, and they return. The girls father is dead, and she works the land, and does everything herself. She is an expert with the bow, and has a very beautiful voice. The animals seem to come around her and not be frightened. The man and woman meet (thats the boy and girl from earlier) and they become enemies, but later as events happen they fall inlove once again. Those are going to be my latest works. It will take forever to finish them. But I have an imagination spurt. So when ever I have those I must write. lol. Well its off to smoke then to bed. *yawn* nighty night!

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