Thursday, January 11, 2007

   AAGGGHHHH!!!
Well remember how i was saying i wanted things to do in work..... well i take it back, im swamped, and the work piles on every day. i come home tired every day and thats evident with the fact that i dont update much.

i amuse myself with some of the names i deal with and they are some strange ones.
example: Harpreep Castleton....im not jokeing, i had to phone her and i found it very hard not to laugh.
i had to phone a guy and i was very very tempted to shout HHHIIIIDEEEHOOOO down the phone his names Mr M Hankey... lol *sings* Mr Hankey the christmas poop
There was one that darrah (the guy next to me) had to phone but he pawned him off on me, but before i could phone him i had to figure out how to pronuce his name, De'paepe, i confused half the office with this before i decided to just ask who i was speakin with when he answered the phone, turns out its De'pee.

i had a guy to day, cheeky f***er, i had to phone to organise an engineer to connect his phone line.his name was Costello, so i say:
Me: hello can i speak with Mr Costello please
Him: Admineral!
Me: Sorry
Him: i am Admineral Costello in the royal navy and i would like to be addressed as such.
Me:............Very well, Mr i mean admineral Costello

he made me call him admineral thou out the whole call AND he insisted that i change all the references to him in the database from Mr to Admineral. he was soo rude to me and all i was very tempted to bump up the charges on his broadband.

Each person in the office has a 'queue' to deal with, which basicaly means everyone has a number of orders they have to look after and make sure the order is completed. but i have noticed that most the people on my queue require call backs or have major problems and the easy ones i have started disappear off it. meaning i get most of the problems and headaches. Ive only been there just over a month!! AND they have me training people!!!! i just finished training myself and even then i still had to figure out the systems mostly by myself, sigh, still it gimme a laugh.
Today i got a newbie thrown on me and i rightly confused him today, heehee i had to phone up another call centre and sort out a few orders and i have to quote the referance numbers (which don't even have numbers in them, hmmm) and you know how hard it is to understand letters being said over the phone so we use a phonectic alaphbet (a=alpha b=bravo etc) and i was in the middle of this when the newbie sat be side me so imagine the look i got when i was saying this:

me: Vector Foxtrot then the dash and Golf Zulu Mobile Hilton Romeo Delta Sierra (vf-gzmhrds), got that, next one Vector Foxtrot, the dash and November Tango Foxtrot Uniform Papa Whiskey X-ray (vf-ntfupwx)

when i finished the call he asked me
"what the hell was that?"
obviously he hadn't heard of the alphbet still his face was funny.

i have a toy panther on my pc (for decoration and to play with when im on the phone) and a large lump of blu-tac i pull bits off to stick up notes. Last night i left my lump of tac and panther on top of the pc like i always do and i came in this morning to find that the lump of tac was turned in to a top hat and stuck on the head of my panther..........okay what ever, but after lunch the hat was gone and instead my panther had a spiky collar....... someone was bored.
and Karens kenny figure was kidnapped....again. no ransom note this time, he'll be back by tomorrow.

over the past few months i have reread and atlered my story and im just gonna start posting from the begining again, i have changed a good deal at the start added bits cut out the corny jokes etc etc. so ill start that some time soon.

night folks
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Tuesday, January 2, 2007

   Hopes fears and a happy new years
Hope you all had a happy new year and had fun

On Friday the 29th everyone on my floor at work was holding their breath as all the names of all of us where written on pieces of paper and put in a cup to see who would work on new years eve and day. 3 names where drawn luckily none where me I was free for new year whoohoo, poor Natasha wasn’t as lucky it was kinda funny thou her name was pulled and she let out a long and loud “Nnnnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww” (“naw” pronuced as spelt, irish slang for no).

Now at some stage over Christmas one of our group decided it was a bright idea to go to tullah bay for the new years party. We can’t mind who came up with it but no one wants to take credit for it anyway. Tullah bay you may remember is a small carvan park on the north east coast of ireland and is more or less in the middle of nowhere so the logic was there was no neighbours to complain about loud music or a crowd of drunken people, however its winter in ireland so its F***ing freezing. I can remember thinking it was a bad idea. So on Sunday the 31st me, pual, tina (both my cuzins) and neil got lifts from my dad and aunt collette and land down at tullah at roughly half 2 in the afternoon armed with electric heaters, multiple gallon barrels of water, (cuz the site is only is use during the summer the water is turned off to prevent damage to pipes, and there is no stock in the shop) and food and drink for the party. Our lifts leave so its just the four of us now ready to party we where there for the night. The weather made us glad of the shop, the winds where gale force (my glasses where blown off my face, that’s strong wind) and the rain was falling hard enough to sting any exposed flesh, the point was made that we where going to stay in the shop all night so there we didn’t worry about it.
Because my mother is the manager of the site I have access to the house building with serves as shop, reception, and laundy house, it also has a kitchen, a living room (where we were going to party) and two bathrooms. So heaters were plugged in to heat the living room we sorted the drink into the fridge, got ice ready, and debated where we would sleep. Once this was done we decided it was time for dinner so where gathered our food and headed for pauls caravan (closest to shop and had a workin microwave) I had a pot noodle, the other 3 used the microwave to nuke their frozen pizza’s and weight watchers meals. Heres where it got fun:
Pual was the last to nuke his food and half way through, the power cuts out. As it is now nearly 6 o clock it is dark outside and the alarm system on the shop is tripped, (its tied into the electric supply for some reason so every time the power cuts out the alarm rings for half an hour) I at first thought it was a problem at the house so I run over to the house in the pissing rain and gale force winds to check the curcit broad, but I have no torch and the house is in darkness, so going back to puals caravan I grab my cuzin tina and we go back to the house and by the light of her mobile phone we check the circuit broad which is out of reach so was poked with a snooker cue. The circuit broad was fine so I go to the window and look out over the valley, the lights from the town a few miles away are gone and a quick look around proves that the electric was out around the whole area. We go back in to the kitchen and I lift the phone, its dead, so I slowly replace the hand set turn to tina and say
“this is like the beginning of every horror film I’ve ever seen”
after I say this it really spooks the two of us out so we run back to paul and niel, I repeat my statement to them two and we are all pretty freaked out. We try to reach my mum on mobile to ask what we do when we do she tells us to stay in the shop light a few candles and if the powers still out by 9 shes coming to get us.
After the phone call we have this conversation.
Me: right, theres candles in the house but we can’t see much with tina’s phone light
Tina: is there not a torch in the shop?
Me: the batteries are dead
Pual: that’s smart
Me: theres one in my caravan (LMD’s caravan is at the other end of the caravan site near the dunes and is in complete darkness), I’ll go get it and we’ll go to the shop
Tina and pual: ok
(LMD heads for door of caravan)
Neil: Wait, don’t go, its always the smart one on their own to get killed first
Tina: what?
Neil: Horror movie rules never split up!
Me: Neil be serious its only a power cut
Pual: he has a point, we are in the middle of nowhere, theres the boy, the gay, the smart one and the bimbo (tina in background: hey!)
Neil: think about it, the only thing missing now is a monster of psycho killer
Me: ah come off it what could happen
(at that moment a large gust of wind rocks the caravan we look at each other in the quiet darkness)

Me: well that was onimious, right forget the torch, lets just get to the house.
(others quickly agree and we stick together to run to the house and door is locked)

we find candles and light up the back room with a pile of them and we wait for while, we joined by Micky and Jason two brothers who live up the road from the site and they confirm that the power is out all over the valley. The power flickers back on a few times but doesn’t last long but round half 8 when we are about to phone mum to pick us up they come back on we cheer loudly and we continue to set up for the party, the others show up (finally) at about 9ish and the party begins.

At around 2 in the morning, LMD is walking alone down the site with a empty gallon water barrel, used to flush the tolet, behind my caravan are a number of water barrels filled by rain water, ok to flush loo with but not to drink we brought drinking water with us thou. Anyway as I was walking down the site I could see just over the dunes lighting strikes over the sea although it was very cool looking LMD began to doubt the logic behind going out in the dark alone the site is very very creepy at night even with the few street lamps. I got the water and ran back up the site in case the storm hit, it didn’t but I could still hear the thunder. It was cool, creepy but cool.

The party went on, we drank we sang, we played games, we cleaned up the knocked over chocolate fountain, the power flickered but stayed on for us and we had great fun. We stayed the night, LMD on a small sofa ending up with very sore shoulders and a stiff neck, which still lingers on today.
And now im back at work and Im slightly depressed. Ah well theres always the weekend

Happy New Year

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Thursday, December 28, 2006

   humph*
well xmas is over, and so are the short holidays i have to work today and tomorrow. sigh what can ya do

about my last post i would like to point out that i was on a sugar rush and very excited so.... ah well you get it

i had a freak on the phone shouting at me becuase he pushed the wrong button on the automated operater jack ass
he wanted to get to dell techinal support (number 5) but he came to vodafone instead (number 2) how is that my fault? why is he shouting at me and demanding to see MY superviser, i called my superviser over to get the freak away from me but by the time gavin got over the freak had hung up!!

my pc hates me too, it wont let me use the internet or the data files i need for my job, my manager is tryin to sort it out so today im kinda hovering around the office like a fly, i think im starting to annoy alan (he was two hours late for work today but it seemed no one but me and Magda noticed lol)
god im so bored right now..... *looks around the room* ah forget it theres nothing for me to do so im going on an extended break

talk to ya later
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Monday, December 25, 2006

....
*enters with silly paper hat and glass of wine*

MERRY CHRISTMAS

HAPPY HONIKCA

and a Solomn SALUNM (i not sure what religon this one is)

Happy holidays to all creeds, colours, race, and bubble gum flavours.
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Wednesday, December 20, 2006

long one da day
Well i haven't really had time to post at length for a while so im gonna tell you some of the funny/strange things from work some facts ive learned and throw in some pics i drew

In the course of my job i see the strangest names, for example Luke Warmn (pronuced warm), kenny mc cormack (the character from south park) but my fave so far has to be Philip P. Philips (god he must hate his mom and dad for that one) these are the real names of some of the customers here i cant belive that. but heres one better, in my job i sometimes have to call people back to sort things out here was my job description
"customer details must be changed due to marriage, call back required to confirm change"
so i call this person up and cuz im still techinally new i have someone beside me listening in to my calls.

Me: Hallo can i speak with miss Tina Mountain please (Mountian?)

Tina: Speaking

Me: This is ***** from vodafone at home i understand you requested we change your contact details

Tina: thats right

Me: ok then before we start can i ask your mobile number,

Tina: ok its *************

Me: thank you and your post code

Tina: *********

Me: last one now can you comfirm your pin code please (so i can be sure its the real customer)

Tina: *********8

Me: thank you, and can i ask the reason for your change of your details (is poked my call couch, whos trying to annoy me)

Tina: well i recently got married

Me: congradulations (Mouths F*** you to call couch and slaps hand) is there anything other than your name you wish to change?

Tina: no hes moved in with me so no need to change me adress or number

Me: Sounds nice, can i have your new name please?

Tina: Mrs Tina Hills

Me: (pause) sorry?

Tina: Hills, H. I. L. L .s

Me: so to clearafy your changing your name from mountain to hills? (call couch brusts into fits of laughter and LMD struggles to suppress histeric laugher)

Tina: silly i know, whats that noise? (refering to laughter in background)

Me: is just one of my colleges Tina, is there anything esle u wish to change or inquire about? (still trying not to laugh and pushes still laughin call couch away from mic)

Tina: ahh no i think thats everything

Me: thank you for useing vodafone at home (starts laughing) goodbye

Tina: (sees funny side and starts laughing too) bye

End of call
in office me and call couch are is stiches and can't stop laughing, i was almost sure this was a stitch up but it was a real customer


It turns out too that i have a nickname around the office too, Lukie, due to the almost consant presece of a bottle of lucozade next to my pc and because i have the lucozade bottle drawing as my background hmm how nice then again i do drink alot of the stuff it does border on addiction. but im not that far yet.

also ive learned few things about office life
1) at anyone time there is always someone singing, humming, tapping or whistleing a song or tune
2) the electronic door manages to hit or trap every third person to walk through it
3) there is always a nerf ball/disc being thrown about the tech department
4) there are only 3 different songs per day (refer to point 1)
5) the push/ pull signs on the door are not always correct or sometimes are missing all together
6) Chairs are an endangered species and tend to ‘migrate’ when you take your 15 min break
7) the on-floor toilets seem to have only one roll per day
8) the person sitting near or next to the vending machine will check the change slot throu out the day
9) said vending machine rarely gives out the correct product
10) only the ones wearing shirts and ties should the internet and solitare games be hidden from
11) to avoid someone simply put on your head set and look stressed, they will assume your on a call and leave
12) never return to an unattended item of food there tends to be some changes made to it (eg pepper added, sweets removed or missing altogether)
13) sleeping under the desk is frowned upon
14) there is always curses mouthed into the phones or the fingers given to the screen when dealing with stupid or angery customers

these apply to my office and there are many more but these are the more interesting points

heres one, under my desk is a small cabinat with three drawers, the top drawer was open but the bottom two where locked (obviousy it was ‘aquired’ from a pervious owner)
on my first day I managed to open the bottom drawer with a pin and a paper clip (yes I picked the lock) all that was in it was a broken head set and a polo wrapper. The second drawer however wasn’t that easy, due to mangled paper clip, I couldn’t pick the lock then so I got hold of another paper clip but the lock was too stiff so I left it. A few days ago it started to really annoy me, I could see something in the 2nd drawer every time I opened the top one, so after another attempt at picking it (it didn’t work) I got Alan to cough loudly while I broke the top drawer off its runners (by opening the top drawer and kneeing it underneath) to get access to the drawer and in it I found a bad drawing of a dalmation with “to mummy from Drew” written on it awwww how sweet, also in the drawer was a pillow…. Yes a pillow. What a weird person.
This coming from the lock picking vandal. Haha

Anyway at the top I promised pictures so here

I know the neck is messed up I couldn’t fix it
and


what ya think? Took me most of yesterday to do these 2

right bye people

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Tuesday, December 19, 2006

*sigh*
i did this in work over the past two days and because skip wont leave me alone about it i decided to post it on here. a cookie if you know who it is:




well i got myself a few pics to try and do on paint now so watch this space there may (stressing may) be more to come

Well for now its 08:00 in the morning, in work which seems empty (note that the world doesn't exsit here until 9 in the morning) im soo tired bored and really cold, plus the fog outside is so thick you cant see four feet in front of you (no kidding) i know this day is going to be crap, but on the funny side theres two girls in my cubicle ones called Nicola Horton the other is called Nicole Harkin hehe it confuses the team manager to no end its funny

right g2g not meant to be on otaku during work hheehee
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Friday, December 15, 2006

   lots of time
well today i actually got to do some work in work, oh my god! they let me use the system however there still isn't enough work to do so two days ago i drew this:


now yesterday i did what little work there was so i had the rest of the day to do this:

check out the detail on this, im so proud of this, and its the exact layout of my cubicle at the time (well ok i had a milky way but the packet of that is too hard to draw) this took me around hummm ...... nearly 3 hours of near pixel by pixel drawing. you like?

today was the same, did what little work i had then, drew the phone i have to use with its weird little head set (but that was too hard to draw):


Alan (a bloke i work with) challaged me to draw my drinks bottle, he bet i couldn't to it, so i did this to spite him:


this shut him up heehee, but after a while he claimed it didn't count cuz it was black and white and not as detailed as "my cubicle" so...



heehee that shut him up. i think its fair to say i was very very bored and had a lot of free time and i have to work on sunday (not fair). i've run out of things to draw. i must get a decent pic of kakaschi to try and draw either that or type up chapters on a smuggled in memory pen.

let me know what you think of my drawings from paint.
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Wednesday, December 13, 2006

life and times
my life is getting hectic.

Granda and granny had to move in with us, don't get me wrong i love them but our house is packed now and i have to share a room with my sister and my room was small enough to begin with. *sigh*

The novelty of a new job has worn off, its boring. the office i work in hasn't "gone live" yet, meaning theres little or no work to do so LMD sits in her little corner of the cubeicle bored to tears. today a tech manager came in and asked for a few people to help with the phones, i immeditily dived under my desk and hid there is no way im going back to those phones! during the day a bloke called micheal sits beside me and hes been teaching me how to use the systems (amazing how none of this was taught to me in training) but he left at half four and im there till half five so with no passwords of user names for any of the systems need to do the job (ya think they give me ones by now) i sat like a twit at my dell and stared into space then i did this:

on MS paint, (now this proves how bored i was count the keys, they're the same as a real keyboard)

Now i said before i walk home from work, 45min walk so its great exersize and im losing wieght, i brought a pair of trousers two weeks ago and there getting baggy so im happy. i might just look pretty as chief brides maid at my sisters wedding *big grin*
HOWEVER.... seen as its winter in ireland, it rains consently, and i mean consently (i think its making me sick). for the last five working days i've had to walk home in the pissing rain, and today was the worst. when i finnally got to my door and my two cats darted out from under our car and ran into the house with me and the three of us may as well have jumped into a swimming pool, i was dretched! so now im in bed after a shower and its only (checks watch) 8 o clock! heehee

Oh before i forget angel says he wants a new picture from me, well i have a number of sketches but no scanner i did however (during work) draw this on paint;

its the girl from Naruto (which skip recently got me hooked too) but for the life of me i can't mind how to spell her name, i think its hinatchi
might draw Kacashi tomorrow

right now im gonna sit in bed and type up my hand writen chapters which where writen whist the laptop was dead so theres some thing to do.

i also FINNALLY got myself kingdom hearts 2 yay!

night night people
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Monday, December 11, 2006

Egits on the phones
Well on friday i finished my 3 weeks of training and today i started live on the floor.
i was stuck in back office, which means i don't answer phones, i order the modems and routers and make sure they make it to the customer. Well it seems the contract doesn't go live until january so theres not much to do in back office. i have a huge cubitle which i share with 3 others and the walls are only elbow level so you can see over them. i have a flat screen monitor and sweet new Dell pc and a very cool keyborad but no mouse or chair. so i sat on the desk beside my pc most of the day. there was nothing for me to do all day.

after lunch i helped out in the techinal dept which is in the same big room, heres the call i got.

Me: Dell Techinal suport my name is ***** how can i help you?

Cus: Ah hallo ***** i got me a nice new computer but im not that good with pcs, i cant get it working, ya think ya can help.

Me: of course, what seems to be the problem?

Cus: right i have it here in front of me and i cant get it to turn on, i think the battery is ... well not working.

Me: Right then before we start troble shooting i need your customer number or product reference

Cus: sorry?

Me: on the drive some where there sould be a sticker with a barcode and number on it can you find it?

Cus: oh right its (ok so i can't mind it)

Me: (checks database for records and comfirms name of cus) Sorry what did you say the problem was again?

Cus: the battery isn't working, it wont power on

Me: My records show that you have purchased a (the pc he got) and im afaird thats a tower unit, only laptops have batterys (head in hands)

Cus: oh.... so....

Me: you recived a power lead with the rest of the leads?

Cus: aye should i connect it?

ME: (bangs head on desk) yes, this is your first computer isn't it?

Cus: aye, afaird so, right im gonna stick you on speaker phone for a min

Me: thats fine, now while you are at the back of the tower i would like you to check all leads at the back.

Cus: (checks leads) aye all there and in the right spots

Me:Right now what i'll like you to do is power it on

Cus: ummm...how?

Me: (momment of slince) there should be a bottom with a circle and a line through it.

Cus: ah right like the kettle (pushes bottom) umm... its making a noise but theres nothing on the screen.

Me: is the screen on? (getting annoyed)

Cus: oh right, (turns on screen while it powers on he makes conversation) so you speak very good english

Me: yeah (slightly confused)

Cus: they must have giving you lessons over there you can hardly hear you're indin accent

Me: im not indin sir

Cus: Really? well where you then?

Me: Ireland sir, is it on yet? (changes the subject quickly)

Cus: aye thanks for the help

Me: no problem, is there anything esle i can help you with? (please no please no please no, crossed fingers)

Cus: Aye now that you say it i could use a bit off help installing this here program i got, its for work so i kinda need it quick

Me: (SHIT!) No problem sir. (really wants to hang up) right insert the first disk,

Cus: it wont fit

Me: what? Push the button on the cd drive to make the drawer come out (gettin pissed off)

Cus: oh not this square thingie then? right i got it now

Me: no, can i put you on hold for a momment while i speak with a colluge for a second.

Cus: aye ok, this thing needs to load anyway.

Me: (pushes hold button, takes off head set and holds pillow onto face to muffle a long string of curses and loud AGHHHHHHH. the man was tring to force the cd into a floppy disk drive) Thank you for holding, is the first disk loaded yet?

Cus: aye, ive tried to put in the second disk but its saying that its still the first disk

Me: im sorry?

Cus: i put the next disk on top but it wont run it

Me: on top? (he didn't remove the first disk first)

Cus: oh hang on, heres me son he'll know what to do? (talks to son) he knows more about pcs than me

Me: can i speak with you son please, perhaps we can set it up quicker

son: hello (sounds around 15) sorry about this, my da doesnt know about pcs, i can sort this now

Me: are you able to finish the installation yourself?

son: yes, sorry about this bye

Me: thats no problem, thank you for calling dell techinal support (hangs up phone quick as possible got up and left the phones never to return, trust me to get an egit on the first call)

There are some idoits who don't deserve computers
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Tuesday, November 28, 2006

   *enters singing 'working 9 to 5'*
hey people hows life
mine currently sucks
while unemployed i never got out of my bed until about 10 or 11 (or in some cases 2 in the afternoon) but now i have to be up at half 7 and be outta the house by quater past eight (i dislike mornings!). i don't start till nine but it costs £3 for a taxi (ripoff) so me and my brother share a taxi (he works in the next building) and he starts at half eight
yesterday was terrible, after work at 17:00 i walk home its a good 40-50mins walk so got home at 17:45ish then i had till 18:30 to get fed, cleaned and changed before i had to go to school from 19:00 to 21:00 and yet again another half hour walk home (i need a car) then bed

im still in training too which is sooooo boreing i sat at the back today and wrote chapter 61 (yes 61, once i get a computer of my own i start posting them again). whats worse is that i don't get my first pay check until next friday (8th of dec) so i have ....*checks wallet*....£4.32 to my name for two weeks.


heres one i have been thinkin of too i might get me a graphics tablet and a decent drawing program and turn the Demon Dragon in to a web comic, but that again would have to wait until i get hold of a proper pc with a good graphics card and proceessor. what ya think?

oh by the way thanks to knights edge who has named the monsters in the desert "skathers"
nice one it worked out very for me

see ya people
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