Wednesday, December 28, 2005

"..take back the pain.."-Linkin Park
::sigh::

Well, yesterday i had a HUGE fight with my mom. It was not good. See friday is my sisters birthday(Sammy), and dad had planned a party for her inviting all our relatives and stuff, and we don't normally do that for sammy's birthday, genrally we have a big party for my twin sisters(abby&becca) and myself at the same time because their birthdays are Aug.4th and mine is Aug.19th so it seems only logical. WELL thinking that sam would love to have a nice everyone shows party, dad set it all up...heh well lets just say it didn't pan out..

the night before last(monday?) i told mom dad wants us home thursday night, and she threw a fit. "it's my weekend, he didn't tell me he was doing anything that's not fair.." blah blah blah..well i told her something along the lines of,"dad does not need to tell you every waking moment of our planned lives." and she went off on the whole "it's my weekend" thing again. i really really wanted to just yell at her saying, "if you hadn't have just packed up and moved out we wouldn't be in this predicament now would we!?", but i didn't. even tho it would have made me feel better i talked calmly not wanting to give her the satisfaction of her getting me angry. and i thought to myself ,after she finally stopped babbling about how she had something planned for sammy, and how she gets her every year for her birthday, that she'd drop it and not dare go against what dad said..i was so wrong.

upon waking up the next morning becca ran in wide eyed and shocked saying something like(i was kind of still half alseep when receieving the news),"mom called dad behind your back and said that she's keeping us for sam's party!!!" That bloody well woke me right up, i was furious, it's a good thing mom was at work cause my blood was boiling. I got changed, snatched the phone from its reciever, typed in the numbers to moms work, and waited impatiently for her to answer anger at the bursting point.

Convo>

Mom:Riverside women's health fishkill, this is meg.

Me:Well hi there.

Mom:Hi?

Me:Anything you'd like to fill me in on?

Mom:Like?

Me:Oh i dunno like, you called dad without telling me, AFTER i told you to let it go.

Mom:don't even start with me Kate, you know that i have you guys every year for New Years and Sam's birthday.

Me:but this year dad wanted to do something special for her, and next year is her 16th so what will you do then?

Mom:We'll worry about that then.

Me:(laughs) Yea, i'm sure.

Mom:Your father did not tell me anything about this, he needed to tell me.

Me:No, he didn't. It was his plan, his party for sam and i didn't even know about it, so i'm guessing it was one big surprise.Oh and lets review, i don't believe you exactly filled him in either.

Mom:I don't have to.

Me:Oh no? Well, i see how it is then, very simple. You make the rules, but don't have to follow them?

Mom:I always have you guys this time of year, it's my weekend, mine. I don't need to tell your father anything.

Me:I'm sure, well i'm glad we've had such a clarifying breakthrough.That was so juvenile mom, you went behind my back, can you say 7th grade?

Mom:I told the twins to tell you this morning.

Me:You mean when you shook them awake and they were half alseep? Convienient that one doesn't really remember things when that happens.

Mom:I thought they'd remember, but i did tell them to tell you.

Me:You should have told me.

Mom:You would have stopped me, tried to.

Me:Yep.

Mom:It's my weekend anyway.

Me:This is ridiculous, you sound like a child. I can't talk to you right now.

Mom:Fine.

::click(both sides)::
endconvo<

nice right? well now dad is letting us stay until sunday morning. that's a long time, and i don't get to see anyone, and mom is working all week so i'm stuck home all day. i talk to dad on the phone everyday to keep some sanity, cause most of my friends are busy having a great vacation. so far the only highlight of my vacation will be that i get to see my cousin Deniese for new years.i haven't seen her for a long time. i miss her.

well i'm gonna go eat dinner. forgive me for the ranting. i'll probably regret it later..

Loudmusic>gotta jet
Time>6:13pm


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Saturday, December 24, 2005

" will they be the first to fall..." -Story of the year

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Thursday, December 22, 2005

Christmas Shopping..over! yay!
today dad got us up at 7:75am and we left the house at about 9am. we got to kingston at around 9:30am and shopped all day until 3:50pm when we went to see "Narnia-The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe." it was good, i liked it.

i got alot of things for alot of people. but i ran out of cash so i couldn't finish my shopping. bummer for me. but that's okay cause i should be getting a job soon and i can just get them awesome birthday presents.

apart from that, we tend to forget that Christmas isn't about our getting presents, it's about the birth of Jesus Christ. It's His birthday and we tend to forget about the unlitmate gift He gave to us, the least we could do is remember the day He was born, and spread the word of His love. i don't think that's too much to ask..

Loudmusic>gotta jet
Time>10:16pm

P.s. don't worry about getting the perfect gift this year,read God's word and realize it was already given to you, you just need to accept it...
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Sunday, December 18, 2005

friday we had a snow day!! man i was so happy to wake up at noon, and i was even happier that i didn't have to do my homework. ^_^

mom couldn't pick us up friday night because the roads up the mountain were wicked icey. so she came to get us at around 11ish 11:30ish today, so dad woke us up early.

i got my hair cut today, but not short cause i'm letting it grow out some more. i watched "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" today, the beginning sucked but the ending was good. I also watched "The Fantastic 4" and i liked that too so that was fun. I made tacos for dinner(yay tacos) and had ice cream after that.

right now i'm watching anime, i have to stay up crazy late tonight cause my step-dad came in and "borrowed" the remote, so i missed alot..

i'm so stressed lately, more than usual. i'm usualy really good about getting good grades, and i can multitask really well, but these days i haven't had any energy to do anything lately, but i still have to do those things. like i have this math test monday that i'm going to die on, because it's somethign i'm not very good at, and i always fall asleep studying these days so i'm freaking out..i got a 76 in math the other day, and i'm decent at math..good enough to get in the 80-85's..but not lately..

i have barely even picked up my guitar..and that is depressing..i can't even find it in me to play..::sigh::

oh, and that myranda thing i mentioned a few posts ago..a few people have come to the realization that she's not only trying to BE me, but adopt my personality and my style, and then improve it..so she wants to be a better me?..i don't know..but she's making my life miserable right now..

..sometimes..you just need a hug..


after thought: how much snow do you guys have?

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Sunday, December 11, 2005

Ice that burns,
a world that turns,
a heart that floods with feeling..

a wave of pain,
a shiver of blame,
a storm of tears that shine...

grey eyes that cannot look up,
cast down unto the darkness,
holding you tightly in it's grasp..

you cannot breath,
you cannot speak,
why not just give in..



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Saturday, December 10, 2005

tree hunting
today we got went on a quest for a Christmas tree..the place we usually go to is nice, not far from where we live and it's usually not crowded..HA this year it was packed! i felt like a crayon packed tightly into a box..although i've never asked a crayon what it's like to be squished among numerous other multicolored crayons so i'm really not sure what thats like..but anyway lol..it had sooo many people there and it took us a long time as always to find our favorite tree..of course dad and i did all the work to lash it to the roof of the van and carrrying it and all that wonderful stuff cause yea my sisters aren't the hardworking type..well ab and bec can be but i think their toes and fingers were frozen soo i'll forgive them just as i do every year ^_^

well it was a relief when we got home cause we were all frozen..i can't tell you how many snowball fights i started hehe..

when we finally got the tree standing and all that we started to put up the lights but then found out two of the 3 ropes of lights didn't work..sooo abby dad and i all went up to kingston to Lowes to buy new lights..

we finally got our entire tree set around 8:30pm..so it was an interesting day..

one of my friends is having problems with their family..he's in a terrible position now and i'm trying my hardest to help them but there is only so much i can do..i feel so helpless..please pray for me..and for this person who will remain unknown..

Loudmusic>gotta jet
Time> 9:53pm

even though you can't always see me..i'm always there for you..
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Thursday, December 8, 2005

" will they be the first to fall..." -Story of the year
hola! well this past week has been very very tiring..monday was nothing but hectic..tuesday was even worse because i had a job interview to work at a skate park..it went well i think..i guess i dunno it was my first interview ever so..

anyway! we're supposed to get wacked with a wicked snow storm tomorrow! hehe! maybe i'll have a snow day..that'd be awesome!

well i have alot of homework, so i should start on it..but it wouldn't be done well because i'm so tired..so i guess i'll have to do it fast tomorrow..

hope you all had an awesome day and that tomorrow is even better..

::yawn:: thats basically what kept happening to me this week..

Loudmusic>gotta jet
Time>10:20pm
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Saturday, December 3, 2005

i'm at my moms right now looking for some awesome pictures for my photobucket site. i love to just search for some cool pictures and most of my myO site is made from my photobucket site..

i always do this when i'm at my moms, i guess it helps me keep my mind of things, preferably this whole myranda thing is still bothering me..if you don't know what i'm talking about and feel like knowing read my previous post..

i had this huge headache thursday night and it stayed until i woke up this morning..thats one crazy long headache..but it's gone now..

well i'm gonna go eat dinner, we're having tacos tonight yay! lol..i'll be back later..
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Saturday, November 26, 2005

well..there have been a few things that have been stuck inside my mind lately..and i think i need to get it out so here it goes..

i have this friend..we'll call her..uh..you know what..i'll just give you guys her real name..it's myranda..okay..she's causing all this drama nd then she ontinuously trys to make herself out to be the victim which is the furthest from the truth as one can get..

for example..she asked out this guy who is an extremely close friend of mine, he's my best friend in fact..and he turned her down. good for him, but anyway..ever since then she's been mad at him. she says he led her on but whatever, it was just wishful thinking on her part. i guess to her a guy reaching out and trying to be her friend automatically means he's flirting with her..and now she's talking about him like he's just a thing and not a person with acctual feelings..that's one of the major things that has ticked me off about her lately..

reason number 2..my friend tina(who was best friends with myranda just last year) was deserted by myranda for two other girls krystina and michelle..which was completely messed up on all levels..and now she's treating tina like crap..which is also freaken ticking me off..

reason number 3..well now she's yelling at me and accusing me of blaming her for all things in the world..which i think i should because regardless of her family troubles she shouldn't take it out on the people who are trying to help her. two nights in a row this week we have "talked", most of it was her accusing me of stupid junk and me defending myself and my friends. everything i said she'd twist, and she always made it look as though i was accussing her all this time. she also is not asking God for help, let alone her friends who she is quickly lossing, because she keeps chasing them away and then accusing them of treason. she wants those of us who still have been civil to her to do all her emotional work for her also, but she does need to take care of things herself too right? am i right or wrong in saying that if she thinks shes an accident waiting to happen she should try to prevent it herself, rather than expect others to do everything for her?

shes got mad at me recently because i simply told her that i was not giving up and i still wanted to remain her friend..she freaked on me and started saying stuff like "just leave already, you never wanted to be my friend to start with, i see it in the way you act." what is with all this second grade 'i'm not your friend anymore' crap!? don't know..

i don't know if i want to be her friend or just give up and end all the drama..please pray for me..

Loudmusic Time<12:01am

..which side of my mind will overcome the other..
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Friday, November 25, 2005

Thanksgiving..again..heh
well..lets see..

i did most of what i said i would..football..pie..family..lol..i got a few calls from a few people that i haven't talked to in a loooooong time...i guess the holidays does that to some people..well anyway..

i hope you all had great thanksgivings!!

lol even though i ate so much stuffing today..i'm still hungry lol..

tomorrow i go back to dads house..it snowed a little bit so i hopefully wont have to drive over..

anyone else get any snow?

Loudmusic Time<12:27am

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