Sunday, September 25, 2005

   When we die, we're going to turn into butterflies.
That's what it said in 'Corpse Bride.' By the way, don't waste your money, it's not that good. The animation was amazing though. Anyway, back to the movie. This Victor person (who lives his life as a fish merchants son, I think) has to get married to a girl that he doesn't know, Victoria. Notice how similar their names are. But her parents are lords and ladies or whatever, and don't want her their daughter married to this 'riff raff.' So they are very mean to poor Victor, and get him all nervous and he keeps screwing up his vows. So after yelling and traumitizing him, they take a break. And during the break he practices his vows in a wood. He gets them right, and during the part where he is suppose to slip the ring onto the brides finger, he puts them on to a 'tree' shaped like a human hand. Except it's not a tree. It's a hand. And he's in a cemetary. So the corpse, who is dressed up in a brides dress with a maggot in her right eye, and her eye kept popping out, comes up and says 'I do.' And that's how he married the Corpse Bride, and later they have a nice song about it. And then all the skeletons break out into dance and that's when they sing the song, answering his questions. And the main question that they answered was that Emily, the corpse brides name, was a young lordess that was in love, but her parents forbade their marriage, so they were going to be married in the dead of night, except that she died, by the hands of her lover that very day. Expect she didn't know that (that her lover killed her). So she vowed to wait under that very spot until her true love came to claim her. And then poor Victor was an idiot and said his vows and blah and before ya know it there was the bride and groom as newly weds.

Now, Victor came up with the 'brillant' idea that they should met his parents. Now Emily agrees, but Victor says that he should prepare them first. So he goes off by himself and guess who he goes to see? VICTORIA! And the maggot in Emilies head told her that she should go see what was taking Victor so long, and she did and saw them together. Now, she exploded and said 'hopscotch' the magic word so they can go back to the land of the dead, and they have a serious discussion.

And then blah blah blah, Victoria goes to (i think the pope?) someone improtant in the church and asked if the living can be married to the dead, and the person carries her off to her parents how in what looks like a stray jacket, and her parents were furious because she was locked in her room when she came down screaming that Victor was married to a dead woman. And then Lord Barkius, another Lord who is quite rich, offers to marry her because his bride died before they had a chance to be married, according to them. Now, because Victorias parents are very poor, they agree.

Now, back to Victor and Emily, they have a discussion and then a fight then they get over it, but then what looks to be a dead pope comes and tells Emily that their is a complication with their marriage. The vows say that they would be together til death do they part. Well, death has already parted them. And the only way to fix that is to have a wedding in the living world and have Victor drink poison to stop his heart. Now, Emily said that she couldn't tell Victor that, because then he would leave, but she couldn't ask him to end his life. And then Victor, who was sitting right outside the door, came in and says 'you don't have to.' And he agrees to do it. Now, the dead come to the living world right after Vicotia and Lord Bartkus's wedding to have a wedding of their own, and then Victoria sneaks in the backway and sees everything with horrified eyes. Then Emily says 'Victor you can't do this. I had a chance to be a bride, and that was stolen from me. Now I've gone and stolen it from somebody else.' And then she turns Victor around and he sees Emily, and then Lord Bartkus barges in and says that she was still his wife. And then you know what? Emily recongizes him as her killer. And then Victor and Bartkus have a sword fight and he unknowingly drinks the poison and dies and then the dead do some very bad things to him that they don't show on film. And then Emily walks away dignified and turns into butterflies, saying that Victor freed her and she was going to do the same. Yes, whacked out flim. And we are all going to turn into butterflies. I DON'T WANT TO TURN INTO BUTTERFLIES!
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