Monday, October 16, 2006

   yesterday was hell, but today I'm fine without you

"Straightjacket Feeling"-The All-American Rejects yeah, starting to learn to cope with things and realising that it won't change. I still miss my friend though.. damn my past.. nice surprises and unexpected friends. also a good title for this post ^^ I'm going to try and keep this a bit short. but seeing how I have almost a whole week to talk about, it might get longer than I planned. well, nothing really special happened on wednesday and thursday I think.. I had fun with Silver-sama on wednesday morning, just hanging out, cuddling and such. cute and lovey dovey ^^ then he had to leave sadly.. work was ok, though some guy asked me if he could put a price sticker on me and take me with him.. I replied friendly: "no sir, cause if you price the cash register, you can't take it with you either." it was flattering, but would've been more fun for me had it been a cute young guy ^^' thursday was boring, can't remember much about it.. friday during the day was boring too.. but work was fun, got a whole lot of compliments about my make-up, since I started to wear it more often and experiment with it. my co-workers like it hehe ^^ and Silver-sama *grins* he sure seems to enjoy it too hehe ^^ after work I had to hurry. why? cause I was going to Silver's house even though he had the lateshift hehe ^^ I was kinda sick of being at home, because my mom keeps telling me that she wants me to stop taking the happy-pills.. I'm destroying my body with them and I'm not doing anything to make it better myself. according to her.. ow well, she will just have to get used to it, because they're starting to really kick in again and I'm starting to feel better thanks to those pills. so I ain't quitting them!!! but anywho, my mom was of course worried sick about me taking the bus and train at 9.30pm.. I had to wait at the train station for about half an hour, but it was ok, lots of personell and safety guard people walking around and it was well lighted. so I called my mom to make her feel a bit better. then, when I got to Breda, I had to walk quite far with a bag that was pretty darn heavy.. but it was way better than waiting for the bus to come.. that would've taken me almost 50 minutes, with walking, it took me 20 to get to Silver's house ^^ it wasn't scary at all, but maybe that's just cause I ain't scared of anything hehe ^^ side story: speaking of being scared, funny thing at work: a grasshopper on the crates of beer that had to be taken inside the store. I was working at the register when I heard my two co-workers say: "we need Lydia, she isn't scared of bugs!!" so they came walking into the store (mind you, there was a line at the register!) and went like: "Lydia, there's a GREEN BUG on the beer and we need you to get it off!!!" I'm like O_o well, alright then ^^ so Evelien took over the register while I went to see this evil GREEN BUG!! it was about this tiny*fingers indicate less than a quarter of an inch*but it was bright green hehe ^^ so I let it walk onto my hand and showed it to Pauline (my other co-worker) she wanted me to get it as far away from her as possible hehe ^^ so I walked to the window where Evelien was behind the register. she smiled and gestured that I had to get it away. but then it jumped from my hand onto my sleeve and Pauline started screaming. she said that it's scary and I was like.. O_o that's just what grasshoppers do.. ow well, after that it jumped onto the ground and I could get back to work as usual ^^ (end of side story) anywho... I didn't encounter any scary rapists or violent youths, so I got to his home safely ^^ talked to his mom for a bit and then went upstairs. watched some tv and went to sleep. I hid all my stuff so he wouldn't know that I was there hehe ^^ and he was really surprised when he came home and found me in his bed YAY ^^ mission accomplished, it was a nice surprise ^^ on saturday, we didn't do much, just hung out and watched tv and whatnot. I made some homework.. but in the evening we went out to play pool with some friends. the friends we had agreed to meet with had brought some more people, so there were seven of us alltogether. it was kinda fun, but I have to admit that I love playing pool with just Silver-sama more ^^" I guess I just want a lot of attention.. but in the end, he finally budged and said we would play a game together, because two of the others had already left. but just as he said he would, the lights above the table went out.. why? cause Frank (the friend I don't really like cause he treats me like a little child) was already paying the bill *sigh* I got kinda pissed about that. the two other guys that came along wanted to get a drink at their favorite bar. so we tagged along. I wanted something stronger than beer, so Silver-sama got me tequilla. enough details, I got wasted as hell and couldn't even walk to the car. guess my drinking got out of hand again after all.. Silver-sama went to get the car and Frank stayed with me while we waited. I pretty much told him everything that had been going on this summer and he comforted me ^^ I'm not always the nicest person to him, but he was a really good friend to me right then. so he was the unexpected friend ^^ sunday was pretty good, not thanks to my horrible hangover.. but thanks to the good care of Silver-sama (honey, I'm still so sorry I puked on your coat.. I hope you can get it clean ^^') I was doing ok. we stayed in bed till about 2.30 pm and he had to catch up on sleep cause he stayed awake worrying about me almost all night ^^ we didn't do much again though hehe ^^" then we went to my house, where I made some more homework, while Silver-sama read Juvenile Orion. it's a really cool series hehe ^^ then we ate and watched tv. Bones as usual on sunday. after that we cuddled and said our goodbyes and then it was time for him to leave again T_T but I will see him tomorrow after work YAY ^^ today started out crappy. first, I missed my bus. so I went back home, lay down for a little while, fell asleep and missed the second bus.. the third one, I did get to in time hehe ^^" I had to do my presentation for english, but last week was pretty crappy, due to those damned pills.. so I didn't make any presentation.. but I explained everything to my teacher, who was very understanding thank goodness. she told me to get help, talk to a dean (I hope that's the right word for it...) and I'll get to make it up in the second semester ^^ then came a Spanish presentation, and that one went horrible.. I'll get my grade later.. after that I went home. I felt like hell, had a really bad headache and my stomach hurt and I was nauscious. but first I handed in my papers to go to Helsinki(Finland) and Stockholm(Sweden)!! yes, another road trip coming up and I can't wait!!! it's so cool ^^ when I got home, I went to bed and slept for about two hours. then it was time to eat and then I started on this post. it got delayed cause I got to talk to Silver-sama on the phone ^^ we didn't have much to say though.. but it's still really good to get to talk to him more often ^^ I'm kinda nervous for thursday.. I'll have my appraisal conversation (god, I hope that BabelFish translated that correctly) at my job.. it will let me know if they're going to give me a new contract or not.. *nervous* I really hope they let me stay, cause I love my job ^^ in other news, I won the bidding on the Tenchi Muyo plushies YAY ^^ so they should arrive soon ^^ and I'm still waiting on my ICP Shit.. it's taking pretty darn long to get here, so I hope nothing went wrong *fingers crossed* I especially can't wait for the messenger bag ^^ it will be so handy to go shopping with it ^^ saves me carrying a whole lot of tiny plastic bags hehe ^^ also, I think it's time for a new theme YAY ^^ and since it's getting close to Halloween for you guys (we don't celebrate it..) it's time for something scary.. for most of the boys that is! yes, it will be Y-A-O-I!!! I'll make sure to pick some decent pictures, nothing too explicit hehe ^^ but I can't make any promises muahahahaha!!! but first, I have to get back to my homework.. *sigh* it has to be done and one part of it isn't all that bad, cause it's working on a site using Front Page. it's pretty fun making a site like that, though I wish I had more time so I could make my very own yaoi site hehe ^^ wish I could see the teacher's reaction *smirk* and a little blast from the past, here's a greeting for today. it's dedicated to someone I miss, but I'm getting adapted to him not contacting me anymore ( NOTE: this is not an attack towards him, he was and still feels like my best friend and I can't really blame him for leaving, since I kept telling him to do what made him happiest.) it's symbolic and I love it ^^ sorry for the long post you guys *hugs you all* I'm outta here EDIT: the theme will be Yami No Matsuei, or Descendants of Darkness. I love it ^^ but it might take some time for me to get it fully up. EDIT 2:I'm working hard on my new theme and not so much my homework.. oh and I had my one year anniversery on here without me even noticing it O_o" I'll make something nice for that too hehe ^^ while I'm at it YAY EDIT 3: colors changes and a nice sign of appreciation for the past year will come later this week, now I'm really outta here ^^ EDIT 4: I only just noticed my horrible spelling mistake in the welcome picture -_-" it will be fixed asap, meaning when I get out of school hehe ^^'

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