Monday, March 21, 2005

Sakura
The distance ended up being too much for Sakura.. She wasn't happy being with me considering we're fourteen-hundred miles away from each other.. I can't blame her. Even though I was going to visit her this summer, it'd wouldn't be permanent, and it'd end up bringing more pain.. But there's a key difference between us.

I'm willing to wait, no matter how long it takes.. Really, the only thing keeping me from begging her to come back out with me is that she was unhappy with me as of late. Really, but life feels very empty now. Everything I thought of, everything I wanted involved being with her. Now it feels like I don't have anything..

And I'm pretty sure that she likes this new guy that she met over the weekend, Ryan. ..I don't know what to do. I feel like I have no reason to really live anymore. I'll just.. do what I can to be a good friend to her, though that will kill me inside, and as we agreed, I'd ask her out in a month. We're just seeing how this will work, I suppose.. Of course, I can't very well ask her out if she's going out with someone by then..

Why is it that she ends up liking so many people? This is at least the third person that she's liked since going out with me (considering she really does like him). I haven't like anyone else. She's all I want.

Anyway, I went to the dentists today. I talked with him about physics while he numbed my face and drilled my teeth. o_o; Just a white filling thing.. Yeah, now I can't feel half my face.
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