Sunday, September 11, 2005

   Never Again.
Never again will I let him touch me
What he did was the last straw.
I'm not going to do it anymore.
I can't sit here and wait
for something that will never happen.
He hurt me... he hurt me for the last time!
He lied to me, betrayed me,
and expects me to say sorry...
Never again will I forgive him.
How? How could he do this to me?
Am I really just his "booty call" as every one says?
I'm nothing to him.
Everything I say means nothing.
It's like I'm just here, I don't matter. I never did.
Never again will I be there for him.
You cannot love with out trust and I can't trust him.
Never again.
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   HOLY FUDGE SICLES!!!
Well... I had an uh... "interesting" week. I woke up Friday morning with a hole in my jaw. It hurts soooooo much!!! My jaw is all big & puffy & I have no bloody idea on how the hole got there. I started dating my friend Brady [who is a guy.] I went to the school dance wearing a tie, amazingly enough I was the only one wearing a tie.... strange I know... & now I have a girlfriend too. 0_o Brady doesn't seem to have a problem with that... lol. This 1 chick is kinda freakin' me out by talkin 'bout sex all the time. I'm really not interested in that kind of junk though.... such a weird week.
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Wednesday, September 7, 2005

   Toes!!!!!!
My toe hurts!!!!!!!!!!! First I scrape it on my dad's crappy plastic trailor house flooring so then it was all bloody & painful & crap, then I accidently kick the door making bleed more, then I drop a big a** dog bone on it!!! My toe hurts!!!!!!! *makes sad & pathetic face*
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   Poetry by Bob.
His lips touched mine
over and over again.
It was wrong, my deadly sin.
Don't regret what I did & may say.
His love his mine
not her's anyway.
Im sick of seeing her hands in his.
I know he's not mine but I wish.
Watching & waiting hurts my heart
but that is life it's the way 'tis
Day after day kiss after kiss
I wait in the shadows,
Praying in bliss.
Hope has become sorrow.
It burns me inside.
These feelings I speak of,
these feelings I hide.
Are killing me slowly,
with every night stride.




I know, crappy isn't it.
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   A normal day.... or as normal as my days are...lol
Well, today was pretty much just normal. I finally got ungrounded. ^__^ Went to the public library & hung out with Trent, Patrick, *Matsutsu Sama*[Matt], Elisa, Frodude [Joe], Kolton, Brea etc. It was fun & interesting. Had a water balloon fight with friends. Every one thinks I've had breast inplants now 'cuz every time a water balloon hit me it hit my chest & bounced right off.... got Kolton soaked so he "accidently" poured Dr. Pepper on me. [lol] Wore a very uh... unique outfit to school, I thought it was sexy... yupe cuz nothin's sexier than a Napoleon Dynamite t-shirt, Patrick's big black hoody that's too big for me & has a big gray skull on the front, a big pink watch, & a tie with white with dark blue stripes. [I stole the tie from a friend before lunch then a bunch of girls were tryin' to find out how to wear it. ^__^ It was interesting] But otherwise a normal day.
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Sunday, September 4, 2005

   Face my squirrely wrath!
Yes, I like french fries. I like chocolate. I like foods that are filled with fat. But I'm not a freakishly fat chick I swear! I'm only fat! lol. Just thought you all should know cuz I'm always like "I like chocolate!"


Chocolate cake & chocolate pies
are the cause of your very big thighs!!!! ^___^


POWER TO THE LARGER PEOPLE! I DON'T CARE IF PEOPLE SAY I'M FAT! I'M A NORMAL SIZED GIRL WHO LOVES TO EAT JUST LIKE THE GUYS DO! I'm 145 pounds of sexiness!!! lol.


But seriously, don't be afraid to be big. A girl I know is a lil bit larger than me & she's decided to stop eating. It's horrible so eat what you want but make sure to take good care of yourself daily!
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   Hurt.
So this Saturday morning I wake up cuz my best friend Maegan calls me. I was at my dad's house [my parents are devorced & I go to my dad's every other weekend] & people usually don't call me there cuz they all think my dad is gonna eat them or something.

*pauses to try to imagine dad whose like a giant teddy bear who has an odd hobby of collecting guns eating my friends*

Mae was all like "Hey Meggie Mouse[cough cough it's my nick name cough cough] Ryan said he just wants to be your friend." I was a lil shocked & confused. Apparently he never liked me. He lied to me & told this slut Chelsea that he only went out with me cuz I asked & he didn't wanna hurt my feelings. WELL GUESS WHAT!!! BEING LIED TO BY YOUR BOYFRIEND WHO SECRETLY HATES YOU IS GONNA HURT MY FEELINGS!!! I mean really, he says he's my friend, but what kinda friend does that? He also told me that he hates Chelsea & that he'd never go out with her. Once again he was lying & he's now going out with her. I'm used to being rejected & dumped but god, that's just cruel! You don't compliment a girl & date her just cuz you feel sorry for her. I'm not some one's pity trip! I'm a human being!

I'm sure none of ya'll wanna hear me complain about some stupid jack*** from school, but I had to write this stuff down somewhere & when I post things it feels like I'm writing in a diary.

I was upset for like the whole day. I wanted to be more than just Ryan's friend. Even though what he did was completely wrong. I delt with a small twinge of pain in my heart that whole day. The only time I forgot about it was when I was with my sister Donny. But the next morning my ex boyfriend/lover/first love/best friend Matt called me. I hadn't talked to him since Monday cuz he's like in high school & I'm still in jr. high. Matt & I broke up like in April even though we were & still are madly in love. Let's just say we were having "problems" cuz I was hearin' some rumors about him cheating & he was about to be a freshman. He's still like one of my best friends. He's always there for me. He said that he heard about Ryan dumping me & he wanted to know why, [cuz we're still in love & he totally wants to kick Ryan's a** for hurting me.] I told him & he was really pissed off about that. It turns out that Matt & his girlfriend Raven are having some troubles [she keeps glomping this other guy who is pretty hot & Matt's getting jealous] Matt & I had been planning on getting back together but crap keeps on getting in the way. But he asked me if once him & Raven split if I'd go back out with him. Of course I said yes, so I forgot about my new hatred for Ryan. ^__^ Yay! Matt once again brightened my day!




By reading this you probably think I'm a total whore or something.... but I'm not. I swear! lol. I'm a good girl who wears clothes that cover everything they need to & I brush my teeth! lol.
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Wednesday, August 31, 2005

   Chocolate is better in color.
I got peas on my head but don't call me a peahead. I got bees on my head but don't call me a leehead. Bruce Lee's on my head. I got lees on my head but don't call me a leehead.

I luv Andy! 0_0 That show is the kewlest!

Devil Kitty says "Every time you lie you just get better at lying." That's a phrase to live by.....



I like chocolate. No, I love chocolate. But I love you more. So like if you & like a yummy chocolate bar where drowning I'd save you first... then I'd totally go after the candy bar... Yeah, this is educational.
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Sunday, August 28, 2005

   Kewlio!
Kewlio! I wrote some articles and people like them! I feel so loved! Thank you Thank you! *waves to adoring fans* Oh, I love you, and you, and you! lol. But that's like really kewl. It's a big confidence boost. So I'd like to say thanks to all those you read/enjoyed/wasted their time with my articles! All the people on Otaku are like freakin' awesome! I love you all!
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   Yay!
OOOOHHH YEAH! Like a week ago I went to the football practice to watch my jock friends sweat to death. lol. I went there wearing a sexy Napoleon Dynamite shirt [ok as sexy as ND gets] and a John Deere hat I stole from a friend. Yes, I was hot stuff. lol. But anyways I haven't seen a lot of these guys since I well... um... 'got out of school early'... But there was this one super FINE guy with bright blue eyes. I didn't hesitate to talk to him cuz I'm kewl like that. Like 2 days later school started back up and the guys like in 3 of my classes, all of which he WILLINGLY chooses to sit by me. I was shocked. He started talking to me and trying to get me to play footsie with him during class. It was kinda weird cuz I thought he was just some weirdo trying to freak me out then my jock friends were all like "Hey Meagan that guy Ryan has the hots for you." I was like WTF??? But then I ended up asking him out, [I'm not sure how that happened...] & he said yes. It was awesome!!! YAY! A guy WILLINGLY likes me. Who cares if he calls obsessivly??? He thinks I'm hot! When hes the only hot guy at school and he's totally wicked kewl. YAY! I'm happy! lol.... I'm such a dork.... popsicles taste good.
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