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• Meggido

Vitals

Birthday
• 1986-04-21
Gender
• Male
Location
• Melbourne, Aus. Though I'd prefer to be somewhere else.
Member Since
• 2004-10-16
Occupation
• Student for a little longer. Volunteer. need a paying job
Real Name
• David

Personal

Achievements
• Um.. a few academic awards, basketball premierships, a hockey premiership and a few dozen other things.
Anime Fan Since
• 1999, late starter
Favorite Anime
• Trigun (all time favourite), .Hack//Sign, .Hack//Legend of the Twilight, Bubblegum Crisis Tokyo 2040, Bleach, Elfen Lied, Code Geass, Fate/Stay Night, darker than Black, FLCL, The list continues...
Goals
• To write a novel, to get into honours.
Hobbies
• Acting, Writing, playing Hockey, watching TV, Playing Videogames,eating, sleeping.
Talents
• I'm a decent Hockey player, I can act and if I feel like it can spin a few words together.




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myOtaku.com: Meggido


Tuesday, November 9, 2004

   Things that remind you...
I've had a good week except for study, but I haven't felt down or anything. Now today when I woke up I was back in my depressive state.

This is never good for me as it ussually returns me to thoughts of how to kill myself. I've always thought that I won't be missed by anyone if I just disappear. The last time I thought about these things I considered hanging myself in the garage.

Now I've recently been listening to Greenday's new album, but when it's not playing I always have one section of it going through my head. It goes like this:

Nobody likes you
Everyone left you
They're all out without you
Having fun.

Now I'm not too sure but this could be what has me so depressed. I just know that my "friends" are out doing fun things and never consider inviting me. I also know that when they are talking about me they are usually laughing at me.

Did I mention I was slightly paranoid? No, well I am. But this has no effect on what I'm feeling. It's not paranoia that has me feeling down because everything I pointed out above is fact.

Now no one probably likes hearing about my problems which is probably why I haven't had a hit in two days, but I somehow have to air my problems.

I know one of these days I'm either goin to completely crack or I'm going to have a complete breakdown. Hell, there have been numerous times this year where I have almost had a breakdown.

At times I just don't feel like going on. I felt like that for the whole of third term. I couldn't gather the energy to do anything. I think I'll go slash my throat, doubt I'll do it though as death scares me.
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