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Wednesday, January 21, 2004



1000 Words: FFX-2 Koda Kumi/Jade

I know that you lied to me
Using gentle words to shelter me
Your words are like a dream
But dreams could never fool me
It's not right to me

I'm acting so distant now
Turned my back as you walked away
But I was listening
That you fight your battles far for me
It's not right to me

"Don't you worry 'cause i'll come back"
I could hear you speaking as you walk to the door
I have to be strong
To hide the pain
When I turn back the pages
Crying might have been the answer
What If I shed my tears and beg you not to leave
But now i'm not afraid
To say what's in my heart

Those thousand words
Have never been spoken
So far away
I'm sending them to you where ever you are
Suspended on silver wings
Those thousand words
Have never been spoken
They cradle you
Make you no longer dare seem so far away
And hold you forever

That dream isn't over yet
I pretend and say "I can't forget"
I still live in my day
You've been there with me all the way
It's not right of me

"Don't you worry 'cause I'll write to you"
I could see you speaking as you look away
I acted strong
To hide the love when I turn back the pages
Anger might have been the answer
But if I shook my head and say that I can't wait
But now i'm not afraid
To say what's in my heart

Those thousand words
Have never been spoken
So far away
I'm sending them to you where ever you are
Suspended on silver wings
Those thousand words
Have never been spoken
They cradle you
Make you no longer dare seem so far away
And hold you forever

And that's a sum up of our relationship, at least in my eyes. Just change a few things.


Comments (1) | Permalink


Heh, everything is in Latin, I'm so weird. New skin for myOtaku, guess I was in a depressing mood. I can't help but think I'm feeling sorry for myself, but really, I should be thinking about someone else.

I need help, I've just become so good at hurting people, it's creepy. I can do it just by opening my stupid little mouth, what a talent.

Can't help being sad, couldn't sleep for the past two nights, didn't realize I cared so much until I lost it. Didn't realize how much I needed it until it was gone. I hate the human heart.

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Sunday, January 4, 2004



"Well, it's been quite some time since I've posted anything here, and Syke has been pushing me to do it, so here I am.

Anyways, Happy New Year! I'm glad it's finally 2004, but I'm upset about having to return to school. One more week of break would be much more sufficient.

I've switched to a regular Algebra class for this semester, AP Emphasis was just a bit much for me. I told my Dad I wasn't good at math.>> Hopefully this class will be a bit easier to keep up with. I'm sticking with my Pre-AP Literature, and the rest of my classes shouldn't be too much trouble.

Back to Christmas, I got a nice big keyboard, which I just can't help but practive on at least an hour a day. It's so much fun to experiment with, and since it has a MIDI hookup, I can write and play songs on it, then upload them onto the computer. Fun, eh?^^

Back to New Years, the Otaku Awards are going on now, pretty interesting thing. I was nominated for a few things by a few people, but I think the most substantial thing for me is the "best couples award." I really don't feel that Syke and I just have to win this award, but it would be nice. I personally feel we're a great couple, the best even, but I probably shouldn't go that far. I'm sure whatever people honestly believe is the way they'll vote, so if they honestly believe Syke and I are the best couple, that's what they'll put. If we don't win, it's perfectly fine, but like I said, it would stil be nice.^~

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Sunday, October 26, 2003


godd
You are Form 1, Goddess: The Creator.

"And The Goddess planted the acorn of life.
She cried a single tear and shed a single drop
of blood upon the earth where she buried it.
From her blood and tear, the acorn grew into
the world."


Some examples of the Goddess Form are Gaia (Greek),
Jehova (Christian), and Brahma (Indian).
The Goddess is associated with the concept of
creation, the number 1, and the element of
earth.
Her sign is the dawn sun.

As a member of Form 1, you are a charismatic
individual and people are drawn to you.
Although sometimes you may seem emotionally
distant, you are deeply in tune with other
people's feelings and have tremendous empathy.
Sometimes you have a tendency to neglect your
own self. Goddesses are the best friends to
have because they're always willing to help.


Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Hm. Well, not much is going on here. My brother and I are currently in the middle of an argument, my parents arre mad at me for starting to show an "attitude," and I've been having these strange dreams lately.


I've been meaning to talk to Ken about some things, considering I've officially appointed him as my "Man for Advice" in my head. Stressed out, not fun.

Also, if anyone is good with dreams, please, talk to me. Blah.~~

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Sunday, October 19, 2003


Quizzes again, and other things of unimportance.

Well, I took some quizzes on one of my favorite sites, Muted Faith, so I thought I would post each of them. Other than that, not much has really happened over Fall Break.






What Type of Villain are You?

mutedfaith.com.








find your element
at mutedfaith.com.








Find your Role-Playing
Stereotype
at mutedfaith.com.








Take the What Type of Friend are
You?
quiz, and visit mutedfaith.com.







Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You?
quiz.

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Sunday, October 12, 2003



Well, not many people seem to be visiting my little journal here, so I can't decide whether to keep adding entries for others to read, or just add them for my own pleasure.

Many of my friends and family have started to fall away from the church lately. Brian, my older brother, is starting to lose faith. Sere, my..well, I guess former friend now, has completely lost faith as far as I know. My friend Katy is growing apart from not only Christ, but me as well. Shannon is now "true" wiccan, and though I can't say that's bad, she used to be a strong Christian, so it's a rather drastic change there.

I've started to worry, because in the the Bible, Revelations I believe, it states that when the End, the armageddon nears, believers will fall away from the Church, the world will turn to chaos, so on..?


I mean, my neighbor Cody, who happens to be a 4th grader, is already contemplating sexual relationships, he's been suspended about 5 times, he cusses like a sailor, and yet he claims that the majority of his friends are like that as well. I ask myself, what is becoming of this world? Why does it have to be this way, and where did it start to change? Has it always just been getting worse, or have we had our ups and downs in history? I'm just so lost sometimes.


Well, our instructor at Church gave us a sheet of paper, it tells ways to make sure you can hear the Holy Spirit, your concious I suppose. Ways to improve your life really. I'll go ahead and list them, then end my post there.


1. Give the Holy Spirit control of your life.
2.Ask God's blessing over your food.
3. Turn off the TV when you see inappropriate behavior or hear offensive words.
4. Walk out of movies when images, words, or the subject matter conflicts with your Christian beliefs.
5.Turn off music when you hear God's name abused.
6. Listen to Christian music.
7. Be honest with your parents about where you are going.
8. Don't cheat on a test, even when you haven't studied.
9. Do your homework.
10.Treat your sibling like a human being.
11. Choose not to repeat gossip.
12. Refuse even to listen to gossip.
13. Wear cloths that are modest.
14. Don't wear clothing with vulgar messages.
15. Attend worship at your Church.
16. Bring Jesus into a conversation.
17. Welcome someone who came to church.
18. Pray for your teachers.
19. Show the love of Jesus in practical ways.
20. Stop an ugly thought before you say it out loud.
21. Throw away trashy books or magazines.
22. Help someone study.
23. Invite someone to your church.
24. Compliment someone.
25. Notice someone who is lonely and talk to him or her.
26. Invite someone to your lunch table.
27. Call someone to encourage him or her.
28. Do something good for someone else, but do it in secret.
29. Listen to your parents.
30. Share with a brother or sister.
31. Stop griping.
32. Tell someone you appreaciate him or her.
33. Ask someone, "How can I help?"
34. Listen and really care about what someone says.
35. Throw a good party that honors Christ.
36. Tithe on the money you earn this week.
37. Memorize a Bible verse.
38. Refuse to visit a pornographic website.
39. Use email to write a caring letter to someone.
40. In a chat room, talk about Jesus instead of someone else.
41. Exit a chat room when the discussion gets vaunchy.
42. Balace your time rather than waste it.
43. Spend time in prayer rather than watching TV.
44. Spend time in Bible study rather than playing video games.
45. Do homework when you get home isntead of putting it off.
46. Do your chores without grumbling.
47. Buy a meal for someone who is discouraged.
48. Look for positive things in every situation.
49. Share Jesus with someone.
50. Love Jesus more today than you did yesturday.


Well, some of those are a bit strange, but I know plently I need to work on.

Comments (4) | Permalink



Saturday, October 11, 2003


Quizzes.^^

Emerald
! You are most like An Emerald !
Caring, giving, - and very emotional. You're the
person
people turn to with a problem. You worry about
everybody,
and genuinely want to help - a little too much
sometimes.
As an emerald, you tend to take a more backseat to
the other
gems, but your inner beauty soon captivates those
who take
the time to get to know you.
Congratulations ... You're the selfless gem
everybody needs as a friend.


?? Which Precious Gem Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla
Well, it says I'm most like my birthstone, I'll just have to hope it's true. I find it rather ironic though, but I'm not going to tell you why.^~


My inner child is ten years old today

My inner child is ten years old!


The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla



Sqwee?^^


Playful
<<>>???What Kind Of Angel R You???<<>>( Anime Pics )

brought to you by Quizilla


Yes, very playful indeed.


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Tuesday, October 7, 2003


Well, last night, I told my parents about Greg, Sere, and many other things regarding my wonderous life. They didn't seem too upset about Syke, but of course, whether Sere and I ever dared to become friends again, I'll pray for her and hope that someday I'll understand her motives.

At school today, Sophmores had to take a Pre-ACT test for the first four hours. Freshman, well, we got to sit through about 3 hours of seminars. Great fun, really.

I also had a friend over tonight, we studied a bit, and then another friend called for help on Final Fantasy.Oo Apparently, I'm known as an expert on FF at school.Oo Strange things happen.

That's about all the interesting things that have happened today, so I think I'll just add one more thing. How do you like the new midi?^^()

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Sunday, October 5, 2003


Whee, Quizzes.

Quizzes are always so fun.^^

DisorderRating
Paranoid:Moderate
Schizoid:Low
Schizotypal:High
Antisocial:Low
Borderline:Moderate
Histrionic:Moderate
Narcissistic:Moderate
Avoidant:Moderate
Dependent:High
Obsessive-Compulsive:High

-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --



Interesting. Well, I'll add more quizzes in later posts.^^

Anyways, today has actually been nice. We did a type of Spring Cleaning at my house, just in the Fall. My room, and all the rooms in the house for that matter, are much cleaner and more organized. My room is now much easier to get around, and I found things that I've been missing for years.oo()

Well, that's basically all that's happened so far today, except I've been playng Soul Calibur II. Not much else to put, so I'll be on my way now.^~

EDIT:

OK, suddenly, I'm steamed. I've put much thought into this, and have decided that Sere, yes you Annie, is trying to control my life. I-can't-stand it! She wants to control everything I do. I'm not allowed to get online late at night in the summer, I'm not allowed to go meet Syke without her, I'm not allowed to keep Syke as my b/f if I don't tell my parents soon! She said if I don't tell my parents, she will. What if I don't want them to know yet? Yes, I plan on telling them, but I will choose when. I don't want you making my decisions for me Sere, I'm getting tired of it. And personally, I don't care if you get mad at me anymore. I've learned it's not my fault.

Come back at me with anything you want. Say I promised I'd stop getting on late in the summer, but let me tell you, I did that because you were getting mad at me. I've never been able to handle people being upset with me. You obviously know that, and take advantage of it, don't you? I'm sick of it. Period.

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Saturday, September 27, 2003


Yet another day goes by.

Well, somehow I developed a cough overnight, probably my allergies, but annoying nonetheless. I had to do the ropes-course today in school, so having a sore throat was extremly unpleasent.

The plus today is, I got to miss class, but the negative side is that I was in the sun all day, and I burn very easily. Oh well.

I'm actually very proud of myself.^^ Not only was I able to fall backwards off a platform down into a blanket(trust thing), I did the Leap of Faith. Let me explain. The Leap of Faith, or Totum Pole, is a..I'd estimate about 25 ft high pole you climb, stand atop, then leap about four feet out and grab a trapeze. Oh so much fun, and hanging in the air by your harness after falling off, I personally enjoyed that part the most.>>

Very interesting day really. Long, hot, "funtastic" day.

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