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myOtaku.com: Mei89


Friday, December 30, 2005

Drunken Walk Routine.

Can we? Just once more? Please? If I told you then...?
Its hard being shut up inside having no one to run to. Not this time. Not for this. Holding dearly onto a fresh but both forlorn and beloved memory. Nothing mattered in the moment. Carefree and cold. And it was there in that moment that I made a great mistake. Funny how things work out you know? No, it wasnt the cold biting at my cheeks. Not the sun in my eyes that paralyzed me. But I dont know just how things are anymore...Not up here. And I see your faces connect and blur and I wonder if you're happy even though I know you are. I see your bodies make the shapes [and I want to scream] and I wonder if I'm being true to myself. Question my sanity. The lines I read, I try desperately to find a place for myself within them. And I'm sorry for the way I treat you. Its not your fault. And now I'm careful of the words I tell you. Cautious. And could you understand? Do you? I know I'm a puzzle. I'm sorry. Its the rings I think in. I've made so many attemtps to break those chains. Just for you. I succeeded this time, but it burst into oblivion. The feelings I failed to contain. I dont think anyone ever can. If you only knew. I can't get it through to you. When im with you i want to hold my head high and smile, and then hide away and scream out to you. I'm so afraid.
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