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myOtaku.com
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AIM
• miyouchan desu
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Birthday
• 1990-07-03
Gender
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Female
Location
• Shin Makoku. Duh.
Member Since
• 2004-03-02
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• 
Real Name
• Call me Ishmael. (I mean, Miyouko.)
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Anime Fan Since
• around 1998
Favorite Anime
• Kyou Kara Maou!
Goals
• become a best-selling novelist
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• anime, manga, yaoi/shounen-ai, writing, vampires, magic
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• Japanese, writing
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Thursday, December 2, 2004
Love sucks. It really does. At least, in my case, anyway...
I suddenly feel depressed ... and I don't really know why. Maybe it's because my pessimistic mind thinks that Morgan doesn't love me anymore...
But I've almost solved that dilemma, because I've just sent her a PM on Gaia asking her if she loves me. *sigh* I guess I finally had to ask her in the end, didn't I? It's just been bothering me so much, I really had to know, and I couldn't wait any longer, so I just up and asked her myself. I'm actually surprised that I had the courage to. *shrug* Yoshimi was a great help, but Operation: Sneaky Yoshimi doesn't need to be put into action now.
I just got back from a band concert. Bleh, I messed up on one of the pieces, and on Christmas Chimes (or Carol of the Bells), the percussion screwed the whole band up. GAH. Stupid drums...
I feel like writing angst now... or maybe just crying. I hate when I think about the stuff I'm thinking about - it's a really heavy load for my mental and emotional stability. And I always end up asking the unanswerable question: Why does she act so intimate when she doesn't even like me like that? Or: If she likes me, why won't she just tell me?
>_< I HATE LOVE!! I don't really want to be in love with her, I just am! I can't fucking help it! AAGHH! And she's not helping my problem any... it's like she's just toying with me! >___< And now I really want to cry... and I'm tired, and I don't want to talk to anyone right now unless it's Yoshimi... so, I'll try not to become completely disconsolate. But my pessimism might make me reject all help and comfort anyone tries to give me. All you can do is try, though....
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