Monday, October 24, 2005

Are you feeling that you're on the brink, of spilling some red in the sink? It wasn't the easiest year No I don't want you to go Are the memories too hard to take? Rape is a word with a face No I don't want you to go You know I don't want you to go Friend of mine stay alive don't you leave me here All alone in the world with a chronic tear I will always be here I will always be here I will always be here for you We walked the promenade in the rain With velcro shoes and an ice cream stain You're the only one who understands Remember that Blake said to make sure you wake and help save your generation You know I don't want you to go You know we don't want you to go Friend of mine stay alive don't you leave me here All alone in the world with a chronic tear I will always be here I will always be here I will always be here for you Don't look back The past is just that We are awake!!! Friend of mine stay alive don't you leave me (x2) I'll always be here! Friend of mine stay alive don't you leave me here All alone in the world with a chronic tear I will always be here I will always be here I will always be here for you ~Friend of Mine - Eve 6 I always did like that song. Seemed fitting for some reason. hnph.. Well, just got back from Oni-Con and i'm rather depressed. On friday night i went gods, just, completely stupid. I mean, Kakashi and i saw this really cool Muraki cosplayer there, and i hugged the muraki because, well, it was MURAKI!! but anyways, after that Kakashi begged me to go to tell the muraki that she was gunna be Tsuzuki on saturday and that i was going to be Watari. well, i said no but because i was also a little jealous, i mean, i'm the muraki of our group. Merurf. But while she was begging me i finally agreed and kiddingly said "i hope you feel like your cheating". Well, damn, everytime i think about when i said that i slam my head against a wall. Kakashi started crying and it took about ten minutes of me comforting her and telling her how sorry i was. x-x i'm such a dipshit e-e. But anyways, soon that Muraki became part of the Team ZOMG because she was just so fucking cool! I mean, she liked the coursairs (one of kakashi's, kiba's, and my own favorite ren.fair bands), she liked most of the anime we do, and most the couples that we do!! At ushicon i'm going to do Muraki and Watari, so when there's two muraki's, i get Tsuzuki and she gets Hisoka . Also, i am now Captain of The Devil's Fallen Rose. Kakashi's my first mate. So far there are only four of us on the ship, but hey, just one more and we can be like Luffy. Give me some gum-gum fruit, yo! >>; okay, no more one piece references. Annnnnyways... Well, on friday, after i got out of school Kakashi picked me up and well, *sighs* she told me what had happened to Hughes. He had gotten run over. currently he's burried in our back yard...i just...i dont know...he wasn't supposed to live up to his name...i tried not to let it get to me at the convention, but there were so many hughes cosplayers...i hugged every single one of them and held back unshed tears for my lost puppy...i just...why did he have to go out the gate? Damnit, i can cry before i go to school. moving on... I look on my MSN Messenger shizzle and sigh. Mizuki's name. "I saw your face...just once...and i break down crying with memories of us...i'm just not over you" and i know she's talking to me. And my heart sinks and my eyes turn away and i start thinking about the con. one scene in paticular. Kakashi and kiba were walking out, i couldn't go because i had duty and they needed to finish costumes. But anyways, I noticed Mizuki out the corner of my eye and kakashi kissed me. i dont think i've ever felt so bad in my life. i remember my thoughts "oh gods, is mizu watching? please, no, please dont let her see it" but i..i couldn't help like feeling like Kakashi had noticed Mizuki, and kissed me infront of her on purpose. I dont know, maybe i'm imagening things but..damn...i dont know..i dont know anymore. Anyways, i finished copying--i mean, doing all my homework last night. so i should have a clean slate today in math. Next weekend my big brother, Josh, is coming down for Ren.Fair, so here's a song to get some others pumped up: Well, I'll sing to the morning, And I'll sing through the night, And I'll sing to the swiftness of our swords, And I'll pray for the comrades to stand strong before the fight, As they all march on so bravely off to war. Our minds are on our sweethearts, Our thoughts are with our friends, In our hearts we feel so empty and alone. And we think about our families, shall we ne'er see them again, And we dream about the day that we'll go home. For I am not a soldier, I am just a minstrel boy, And my duty to this army is to sing them songs of joy. To keep their hearts in the battle, To keep their minds from the fray, And I'm not afraid to die, today. And I see their burdens lighten, I see their spirits lift As I sing them songs of battles won before, And I feel their muscles tighten and I sense their feelings shift, As they strive on to the struggle that's in store. Well, the battle rages onward, The fighting has begun, And the men they show no mercy and no fear. Now the darkness it surrounds us as the clouds pass o'er the sun, And in my death the minutes pass like years. For I am not a soldier, I am just a minstrel boy, And my duty to this army is to sing them songs of joy. To keep their hearts in the battle, To keep their minds from the fray, And I'm not afraid to die, today. For I am not a soldier, I am just a minstrel boy, And my duty to this army is to sing them songs of joy. To keep their hearts in the battle, To keep their minds from the fray, And I'm not afraid to die, today. And so now my strings are broken, And my flute is torn in two, And my honor and my duty to this army now are through. There'll be no more songs of laughter, no more time to sit and play, And I am afraid to die, today.

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