Thursday, July 29, 2004

THIS survery
001) What time are you starting this?: July 28, 15.01 pm *beep*

002) Name?: Mia-Marlene **********.

003) Date of birth?: 24th of August, 1981.

004) Sex?: Not yet … Female.

005) Height?: 1.64 cm (which I think is somewhere around 5'2. Though I can't be sure).

006) Eye color?: Blue.

007) Weight?: 65 kg. (So I'm not huuuuge, but I'm not skinny either.)

008) Location?: Sweden.

009) Where were you born?: Lidköping.

010) Have you ever failed a grade?: Never.

011) If you have, what grade did you fail?: -

012) Do you have crush on someone?: *blurble*

013) Do you have a bf/gf?: Of course not.

014) If so, what is their name?: -

015) How long have you been together?: -

016) What are you wearing right now?: White socks, white shorts, pale blue t-shirt and white underwear.

017) Would you have sex before marriage?: Yes.

018) Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers?: I was the only one who didn't have a crush on him, haha.

019) Are you a virgin?: Yes.

020) Do you smoke?: No way.

021) Do you drink?: Water, milk and various fruity juices.

022) Are you ghetto?: Yo.

023) Are you a player?: I play music and video games :D

024) What are your favorite colors?: I like blues, but it's difficult to narrow it down to just the one shade of color.

025) What is your favorite animal?: Bunnies and killer whales.

026) Do you have any birthmarks?: Yep.

027) Have you ever gotten your ass kicked?: Not my ass, no.

028) Who are your best friends?: My younger and oldest sister are really cool friends, as is everyone I've befriended around here ^_^

029) Have you ever beat someone up?: Given a punch, yes. Beaten up, no.

030) Who do you talk to most on the phone?: … No one *sad*

031) Have you ever been slapped?: Yes, in a Music class me and this girl were very bored and decided to check how much it hurt to be slapped across the cheek. It hurt, lol.

032) Do you get online a lot?: Uh-huh.

033) Are you shy or outgoing?: Depends on the company and how the stars are aligned. Seriously, I'm shy around some people and not around others.

034) Do you shower?: A lot.

035) Do you hate school?: Not really. At least not the ones you go to when you get older.

036) Do you have a social life?: Outside the internet ? Sadly, no.

037) How easily do you trust people?: Easily enough. Though if you've burnt my trust or someone close to me, then I'll be wary and keep a mental distance.

038) Have you ever lied to your best friends?: Not to my best friends, that I can remember.

039) Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing?: Doesn't everyone ?

040) Would you ever sky dive?: Eeeep, I'd rather go on a roller coaster ^_^;

041) Do you like to dance?: I like to bounce around, does that count ?

042) Do you like your handwriting?: From time to time.

044) What is the compliment you get most from people?: Uhm… That I'm nice ?

045) If a movie was made about your life, what would it be called?: "Metamorphoses in bloom"

046) What's your biggest fear?: Losing my sanity/health/loved ones.

047) Can you sing?: Maybe not really good, but I do break out into song every now and then.

048) You ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool?: Haha, no. Though it's fun to see others do it >:)

049) Are you a loner?: When I need to be.

050) What is your number?: What number ?

051) If you were another person, would you be friends with who you are now?: Yes, that'd work.

052) Are you a daredevil?: Not in the conventional sense, lol

053) Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself?: I hate how my body can turn against me without my approval.

054) Are you aggressive or passive?: I'm both.

055) Have you got a journal?: I count this one as my journal.

056) What is your greatest strength and weakness? Strength: Fighting spirit/stubborn Weakness: my fear of getting hurt and let down.

057) If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be, why?: Can't think of anything I'd change … right now.

058) There are three wells: love, beauty and creativity; which one would you drink out of?: Love. You can never have/give enough.

060) Do you think you are emotionally strong?: Mhm.

061) Do you live in the moment?: Very much so.

062) Do you have any bad habits?: I tend to flip pens on and off, repeatedly, if I have one in my hand >_>;

063) What is the most important lesson you've learned from life?: It can get better.

064) What do you like the most about your body?: My nails.

065) And least?: My ovaries.

066) Do you think you are good looking?: No. But others can think what they want :p

067) Are you confident?: About certain things, yes.

068) Have you ever been out of state?: *non US resident*

069) Do you like to travel?: Yes !

070) Have you ever been expelled from school?: No.

071) Have you ever been suspended from school?: Only during lunch for a couple of years.

071) Do you want to get out of your hometown?: To travel, yeah.

072) Are you spoiled?: Not in a bratty kind of way, but I've gotten just as much (and more) as I've given.

073) Are you a brat?: Neh.

074) Have you ever been dumped?: Yeah, by friends.

075) Have you ever gotten high?: All the time, from my own body’s natural chemicals.

076) What's your favorite drink?: My "cocktail". (A nourishment drink, loaded with vitamins and what-have-you. Usually prescribed to people who don't get enough of their daily intake of healthy stuff.)

077) Do you like Snapple?: Don't know what it is, but I figure it's something you drink ?

078) Do you drink a lot of water?: Probably not enough, but yes.

079) What toothpaste do you use?: *checks* Pepsodent Crystal Fresh.

080) Do you have a cell phone or pager?: Cellphone.

081) Do you have a curfew?: Not that I'm aware of O.o

082) Who do you look up to?: People who fight for themselves/people they love and who love to live their lives.

083) Are you a role model?: There are probably better ones than me.

084) Have you ever been to Six Flags?: No ;_;

085) What name brand do you wear the most?: I have no idea.

086) What kind of jewelry do you wear?: My watch and my necklace with the Chinese symbol for "Love".

087) What do you have pierced?: Nothing.

088) What do you want pierced?: Nothing.

089) Do you like taking pictures?: I most certainly do !

090) Do you like getting your picture taken?: Eh, sometimes. If I have a good day :p

091) Do you have a tan?: Compared to the rest of my family, not really. But I do have more color this summer ^_^

092) Do you get annoyed easily?: In certain situations, yeah.

093) Have you ever started a rumor?: Haha, no.

094) Do you have your own phone/phone line?: No, I share with everyone else.

095) Do you have your own pool?: It would be cool to have one.

096) Do you have any siblings?: Three sisters (2 older, 1 younger).

097) Do you prefer boxers or briefs?: On guys ? … Boxers look nice, but I don't really have a preference as such, lol.

098) Have you ever been played?: I can't say.

099) Have you ever played anyone?: No. Not with intention at least, so if anyone feels played then it isn't my purpose.

100) Do you get along with your parents?: On different levels, absolutely.

102) How do you vent your anger?: Loud music and exercise. Mostly I try to talk about it to a family member or a friend, to get it out of my system.

103) Have you ever run away?: For a few hours, sure.

104) Have you ever been fired from a job?: Nope.

105) Do you even have a job?: In theory, yeah.

106) Do you daydream a lot?: Of course.

107) Do you have a lot of exes?: Not a single one.

108) Do you run your mouth?: Rarely.

109) What do you want a tattoo of?: I don't really want one per se, but it'd be cool to get a pair of butterfly-esque wings that Azure did on a wallpaper and I'd want them across my upper back/shoulder blades.

110) What do you have a tattoo of?: Don't have any.

111) What are your favorite flowers?: Lilly (don't really have a favourite, but they look nice).

112) What does your ex bf/gf look like?: -

113) What does your most recent crush look like?: *blurble*

114) Have you ever been bitched out?: On a small scale, yes.

115) When was the last time you bitched someone out?: I don't bitch.

116) Are you rude?: When I'm PMS'ing I can be snappy, heh.

117) What was the last compliment you received?: That I'm an incredible person *beams*

118) Do you like getting dirty?: Only if I can wash myself off afterwards, lol.

119) Is your bellybutton an innie or outie?: Innie.

120) Are you flexible?: Partly.

121) What is your heritage?: From what I've heard: French, Polish, Finnish.

122) What is your lucky number?: Don't have one. But I like the number 7 for some reason.

123) What does your hair look like right now?: It's straight and in desperate need of highlights, due to my blonde outgrowth.

124) Could you ever be a vegetarian?: Only if I wanted to starve myself to death.

125) When was your last real heartbreak?: Recently.

126) Describe your looks?: No ?

127) If you had to completely dye your hair it'd be what color?: Purple ! … or black.

128) Would you ever date someone younger than you?: Yes.

129) Would you ever date someone older than you?: Yes.

130) When was the last time you were drunk?: Never.

131) When was the last time you went on a date?: Why do you assume I've been on one ?

132) Would you rather give or receive oral sex?: *stares at screen*

133) Have you ever given?: No.

134) Have you ever received?: No.

135) Have you ever had an eating disorder?: I think it's interesting that this question comes after the three previous ones, LOL. But no, I've never really had one.

136) Do you have one now?: Only in the sense that I can't/refuse to eat certain things.

137) How many rings until you answer the phone?: Depending on where I am in the house and if I expect someone else to answer … 3-7.

138) Have you ever been skinnydipping?: Nope.

139) If yes, when was the last time?: -

140) Do you look more like your mother or father?: People say I look a lot like my mom.

141) Do you cry a lot?: Maybe.

142) Do you ever cry to get your way?: I'm not that childish.

143) If you had to amputate one limb, what would it be?: My uterus.

144) What phrase do you use most when on the phone?: Really ? Yeah/Ok. Mmm/Mhm.

145) Are you the romantic type?: I'd say so.

146) Have you ever been chased by cops?: Thankfully no.

147) What do you like most about your body?: It's soft.

148) What do you like least about your body?: The fact that its got a mind of its own.

149) Who did you last hook up with?: My sister[s].

150) When was the last time you threw up?: More than a decade ago. That's all I can remember.

151) In the opposite sex, do you prefer blondes or brunettes?: Black ! … *cough* I mean, it makes no difference.

152) What do the shoes you last wore look like?: It was my dad's red/white sneakers.

153) Do you ever wear shirts to show your belly?: Most of my clothes cover my belly.

154) What about cleavage?: Not if I can help it.

155) Is your best friend a virgin?: Some are and some aren't.

156) Have you ever fucked someone up?: I'd like to think I haven't.

157) Have you ever been fucked up?: Slightly.

158) What color are your underwear right now?: White.

159) What theme does your room have?: Light and cosy ^_^

160) What size shoe do you wear?: (In my country) size 39.

161) What jewelry are you wearing now?: Not wearing jewellery.

162) What is your screen name on AIM?: OtakuMimmi

163) Would you pick a wedgie in public?: Yes, discretely.

164) How are you feeling right now?: Alert and a little bit mischievous.

165) When was the last time you were at a party?: Ages ago.

166) Have you ever given a lapdance?: Nooo.

167) What do you sleep in?: A nice, comfortable and roomy bed. Unless we're talking clothes, in which case I'll wear a t-shirt/top or pyjamas.

168) Has there ever been a rumor spread about you?: Not that I'm aware of.

169) What is one of your bad qualities?: My secluded-ness (which I'm working at).

170) What is one of your good qualities?: Generosity.

171) Would you marry for money?: No.

172) What do you drive?: My bike.

173) Have you ever given or received roadhead?: Roadhead?

174) Are you more of a mama or daddy's child?: I'm mommy's girl (and dad's tormentor >:D).

175) What's does your myOtaky username mean?: It's my nickname.

176) What's your favorite myOtaku to read?: Too many to name, hehe (not to mention the pluggage would kills my hands).

177) When was the last time you cried in school?: Don’t remember. It's been too long ago.

178) Do you wear Chucks?: Not to my knowledge.

179) For two million dollars, would you pose for Playboy?: No.

180) What time are you finishing this?: 28 July, 16:08 pm *beep*

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Wednesday, July 28, 2004

To take the survey or not ....
Late last night I played through the last fight of FFX-2 and did it slightly differently. I swear this game drives me insane. Silly sentimental me :p

In other news: I need British currency, preferably before we get to England. And it would be good to make a short list of things I cannot leave behind. Hehe, my travel dreams always consist of me forgetting something and I'd hate for that to happen in reality.

Tony's a cool guy. Check out his super post in Kill Adam II, over at OB *points*


Do you guys really want to see me take that survey that's floating about ? *looks around*
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Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Chips ... crisps ... potatoes dripped in salt and grease.
Thanks for the awesome replies to my post *gushes over everyone* And to those who've signed my Guestbook ... I swear I'll get 'round to it ^_^;;;


I'm feeling rather lazy today and that's being blamed on the chips/crisps I ate earlier. It's more of a relaxed feeling than utter boredom or apathy, which is nice.
I mean it's nice it isn't apathy or anything like that, hehe.

My older sister is going through a Kevin Bacon phase and had ordered some DVD's where he featured. No one had anything better to do and Kevin is nice to look at and he can act, so we watched "She's having a baby". Can't say that it's a brilliant movie, but there was one scene that was really good.

(I doubt I'll give anything away by saying she's having a baby, seeing as that is the title of the movie)

While the wife is giving birth to the baby, Kevin is waiting in the (tada) waiting room. The lighting of the room is just perfect, as is the placing of the people in there. A ballad is playing in the background and it goes from showing his face to flashbacks of moments with his wife. It was really effective *nods*


My sister was doing the dishes while I had my dinner and she was singing. The tune reminded me of another song but I didn't know the lyrics to it or who made it. So I hummed it to those who were in the kitchen (because someone will always know, it's like a natural law or something, lol) and it turned out it was "Annie's Song" by John Denver. Mom said we had it on ... ehm "vinyl" ?, so I'll go see if I can dig it out when I'm done with the post ^_^


"Annie's Song" John Denver

You fill up my senses
Like a night in a forest
Like the mountains in springtime
Like a walk in the rain
Like a storm in the desert
Like a sleepy blue ocean
You fill up my senses
Come fill me again

Come let me love you
Let me give my life to you
Let me drown in your laughter
Let me die in your arms
Let me lay down beside you
Let me always be with you
Come let me love you
Come love me again

You fill up my senses
Like a night in a forest
Like the mountains in springtime
Like a walk in the rain
Like a storm in the desert
Like a sleepy blue ocean
You fill up my senses
Come fill me again

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Monday, July 26, 2004

Triumphant posing is great ... as long as you've stretched ^_^;
During the day I think of many things to write about in here, whole sentences of really thought out thoughts .... but the second my bum is located on the chair and these fingers are swivelling across the keyboard, my head is strangely empty. All I can think of is how I've felt during the day or this particular moment and that's not something easily translated into words. Unless you want incoherent babbling, including many facial expressions in forms of smileys and general nonsense.... which my posts are filled with anyway, lol.

It seems as though, slowly but surely, I'm getting better at communicating through actual verbal conversation and sometimes it's as if my ability to express myself in writing has suffered due to that progress. Or maybe I've become sloppy and stopped applying myself as much as before, when the only way to convey anything going on inside me was to write it down and sneak it to my mom and then run back into my room, hiding in my bed until she came and helped me exorcise it :p

Thinking of how much everything's changed .... or how much closer to my "true identity" I've come .... forces me to constantly re-evaluate who I am, my view of myself. Me, my, I, me, me, me. Heh. It's always been something I've pushed away, not wanting to think about. Because that used to be a very dark and dreary place and nothing good ever came out of it. Focusing on others and sort of erasing myself became a habit, until, even if I wanted to, it appeared impossible to tell what was me anymore.

In a sense that gave me the opportunity to create something entirely new and move away from whatever was behind me; but let's face it, looking at yourself and finding nothing isn't exactely what you consider a lucky break or anything. So in the beginning it was an ardous journey, constantly bashing my head in and wondering why I ever decided to "find myself", to rebuild my existance and make others recognise me (Naruto moment there). Though there wasn't much choice. It was either that or disappear alltogether. One thing that never got erased was the stubbornness and fighting spirit, although that would often be more of a negative. If not controlled, that could/can make things even worse. When it's working and cooperating, it's the best tool ever.


I'm not sure where I've gone with all this, but it was nice to type out. Basically .... I've come so far and there's still so much ground to cover. And it's exciting ^_^


Oh right, about the communicating verbally. A few weeks back my sister mentioned, as we were talking on the phone, how much easier it was to talk to me. How she felt that it was actually a conversation and not a monologue on her part, hehe. Mom also loves to just look at me with this motherly gleam in her eyes when I get my "hyper" moments and babble on about ... whatever, lol. It still makes me blush and want to recoil into my [invisible multicolored] bubble when someone points out that I'm more outgoing these days ^_^; I've never been one to take up much space and being the center of attention isn't my style. That's not to say I have anything against being noticed ;p


Wheehoo, this is enjoyable. Just sitting here and typing things up as they come, writing away. It's still here. It's just transformed a little.



I'm excited about the London trip, but it feels like I'll come off as obsessing if I rave too often about it. Which isn't the case. My expectations of the whole deal is this: "I'll get on a plane and get there, be there and whatever happens will happen, then I get on a plane back home. That way I won't be setting myself up for a major disappointment and can relax and enjoy what is meant to be a recreational trip." Aren't I being very reasonable ? :p

Apparently my dad asked my sister earlier how she felt about the trip. Her answer, as he relayed it to me, is in italics.

"Well, it's too late to cancel anything now".

(Oooo, how encouraing >:p)

"I'm doing it for Mimmi's sake."

(Guilt attacking me, bring out the giant "laser" !)


Bah. I'm going. She either comes with me and we get there together, having whatever time we have (good or bad) OR she stays home and I go on my own. Tada, that's all there is to it. At least if you strip it of all the emotional stuff :p


Speaking of sisters, my younger one has been out of town for a few days (.... well, she doesn't actually live at home anymore so any time she doesn't spend here isn't technically out of town... ) and today she got back. It's good to have her around and I really appreciate that we've managed to get a good sister-relationship going. It means even more now that I've become more sociable and don't have any friends that live within walking or bussing distance, heh. If only I had a jet ~_^

But now it's Naruto time, so I will stop this train of thought and leave you all wondering just how long you'd survive in my silly brain :D

*huggles everyone twice as much as usual*
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Sunday, July 25, 2004

It lives
Sister and parents are at some place where they make cheese, eating a buffet. The house is so peaceful, as am I.

The Last Samurai would be good to watch with the sound turned up to full blast, blinds drawn and Shnookums cuddled up in my arms. Hopefully they'll take their time coming back home.

Wrote a post last night at midnight but decided not to post it. I'll put it up now.

---

If this were an actual post there'd be some actual content in it. But it's not, so there's nothing to see. Too bad. Something else that's bad is that my eyes are hurting from watching tv with little light.

My older sister rented some movies yesterday. "Freaky Friday", "Catch me if you can", "Trapped" and a Swedish movie no one's probably heard of (which is why I'm not typing the title). I began my exercising just as everyone else began to watch "Freaky Friday" (gotta love the irony), so I missed the first half hour or so.

The guy Jake looked so familiar, but as usual it took me a while to place him ... Actually, I had to look him up on IMDB, where it said he was on "Gilmore Girls". It makes sense that I kept thinking of ... that other guy that Rory dated and broke up with ... Dean ! Haha, I remembered ! ..... Anyway. I was close, but no score. Figures.

Typically I can't remember the original very well, meaning not much of a comparison can be made. It was an enjoyable movie *shrugs*

The "Trapped" video was busted, otherwise that would've played after my daily run of "The Last Samurai". Instead I sat through "Catch me if you can", thinking about Leonardo di Caprio's acting career, Tom Hanks' accent and briefly Johnny Depp's performance in "Blow". Now there isn't anything left to watch. Aside from the assortment in my DVD collection.


My cold is remarkably better today, allowing me to go full steam ahead on what has become my daily routine of exercising. It's not much, but anything's better than nothing. It'd be nice to have someone scrub me down in the shower afterwards though, because I'm lazy and would love to just stand there and enjoy the shower without having to get more exercise on my arms. Lazy reason, that's all.

Main thing is that everyone else said they'd hit the gym this summer. No one's been yet and so my efforts come off as even grander. Lovely.


Something even more lovely is the Adventure Arena. In particular Solo's venture. It'd be fun to try it. Running amock with people would be hilarious fun. It's just that I have no character (though inspiration will probably strike me to death the minute I finish this post) and no clue (though hints are scattered everywhere), so probably best to leave it to those who does :p


*huggles to you all*

---

*gives her bowling buddy a big cuddle* Thank you
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Thursday, July 22, 2004

Just because
One day I was browsing Panda's place and although I can't remember what the question of that day was, it prompted me to look for a rather funny photo of myself. Mom had reorganized her dresser, so I didn't find the picture and it took until today for mom to have the time to dig the old batch out. She even showed me some of herself, taken in photo booths, when she was a teenager. No wonder she was asked to model, with that gorgeous face ! That's something she should've passed down, but I'm ok with being just cute :p

Anyway. In the batch of old pictures was a more recent black and white photo, taken by a classmate of mine when we were about 14-15. It doesn't make much sense that I hung out with her actually, since we really had little in common. But we got along pretty well and wasted many hours taking pictures during Arts class. Then we used even more Math hours developing them *grins* (It amazes me that I passed Math, with the attendance I had that last year…)

I thought that picture had been lost in one of countless clearances I've done in my room[s], so it was wonderful to see that mom had taken care of it.

But before I show you the pictures that made me completely forget I have this nasty cold, here's a little question:

If someone asked you if these eyes belonged to the same person, what would you say ? Yes or no ?



(The answer will be apparent if you continue scrolling down.)



I really loved that jacket even though it did nothing against the rain and cold, heh. And the sweater barely had time to leave the washing machine before being put on again. It made me feel pretty -^_^-



Haha ! My favourite kiddy picture :D It's a great conversational piece, since everyone wonders what I'm eating and no one knows !



My first school picture. 6 years old, kindergarten. Notice the long hair (which at one point went all the way down to my waist) and the Pluto sweater ^_^


Ends pseudo update with commentary … comments
Ben: I can feel it working already ! Wazoo :D

Baron: It was amusing, but I didn't like it :p *rests*

Pyro: You are a wise woman and that should be printed on a t-shirt *plots* Still haven't tried that lemon drink >_>;;

exotahu4: Thank you ! I appreciate it ^__^

Panda: *grabs everything and proceeds to get-betterness* I say we replace ‘42’ with ‘chocolate’ as the answer to everything ;p

Molly: Stan ! Yes, send him over. Him and Shnookums could … Wait a second. Best to keep those two separated. Who knows what they'll cook up otherwise ~_^

Winged Youki: Kudos ^__^ With all these well-wishes, I should hope the recovery is speedy !

HC: Oh it will. Believe me it will… And why does that sound so psychotic when I read it back ? ~_^;;;

Rustym: Hahaha, nice one *giggles off chair* A good laugh will always help :D

TheAngelHasFallen: So do I ! Arigato ^__^


*watches The Last Samurai ... again*
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Pathetic
I have a cold and feel pathetic. Good excuse to glomp chocolate, hehe.

*gives everyone lots of virtual hugs and love*
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