Sunday, May 29, 2005

*shrug*

Mmmm, used my MP3 player for the first time yesterday and it managed to divert my attention from my mood while I biked to the videostore to return the movies. Last time I tried to bike with music streaming in my ears it was a very disoriented experience. This time it was amazingly wonderful. Funny that. The sound is pretty good, it looks easy enough to use but I'd really like to get a hold of a pair of new headhpones (and I'm using my old ones instead of the silly things they sent with the player). Solo had these spiffy headphones that are nowhere to be found in Sweden, sadly, and I don't know if Solo's had a chance to have a look for me but here's what they look like. (Well, out of all the choices available on the website, those are the ones I'd like to buy.) It's times like these that remind me of the usefulness of having a credit card .... and also how much more money I'd spend if I had one, lol. Mom asked me to come along to view an apartment today (since she "trust my judgement more than her own" and that's just another thing that adds up to how irrational people are being about the moving thing) so it looks like I'll have to go with her and dad. It does mess up my day quite a bit, which I'm not too happy about. But if it's between stopping mom from making a rash decision and having a Sunday to spend as I want to.... yeah. *prepares herself for the journey* EDIT: Well, we looked at two apartments. The first one had room for all three of us, needed some work done decoration-wise, and the kitchen + bathroom were scheduled to be worked on. So that one would have to wait until September, if we went for it. The second one only had room for two people and it was in the same apartment building as my younger sisters' apartment. Mom fell head over heals in love with it. Now, by this time I'm exhausted and ready to just go home (since this one had to be moved into uber speedily and we'd agreed that that wasn't on the agenda for us) but mom completely ignored that afterwards, when we had gone back to my sisters apartment, going on about how great it is and how we could arrange it for us to live there. Her hysteria about moving there is really making me furious right now. We had agreed on doing this properly after the summer, not 2 weeks after I'd begun my working rehabilitation. If the "move move MOVE QUICKLY" had been on the agenda then obviously I'd never have started anything up here, but I have and she obviously can't get it into her head that I'm not about to start over AGAIN within a very short period of time. Oh joy, now I'm crying. I knew this would happen and that's why I didn't want to go. The stress has kept me from resting/sleeping enough, no one's paid attention to me unless it's to win me over on their side of arguments/whatever and today it felt like plans were being made for me ("She can do this and that") without even acknowledging that it's MY decision what I end up doing. As if my problems aren't important enough and can be "fixed" easily enough. Yeah, that's worked a real treat in the past *rolls eyes* They're really not making this any easier on me and this time I was pushed too far. I really needed today to gather up some energy and start next week fresh, but that plan obviously failed. God, I wish I could come over to you right now. Or turn back the clock to 4 years ago and stay in bed that morning. Neither is very plausible to actually do, though. Heh. I'd really appreciate if you all could avoid talking to me about this if you see me on AIM. Just offer to play Literati with me or talk about how things are going in your life or whatever you can think of that doesn't have to do with moving. Thanks.

Comments (5)