Thursday, June 30, 2005

I've bought Basement Jaxx's Singles cd and love it - Thanks Pyro =)

The time not spent moping around on the internet has been divided between catching sun (I got burned but oddly enough it doesn't hurt/sting one bit), working at the video store (will add on the hours starting next week), feeling painfully amorous (want you lovely /lust&love) planning for the move (so much to think about), and generally keep calm/peaceful (which sometimes flips over to sadness *glances at yesterday's post*). Obviously I'm not a static machine, nor is life, so how things are ... changes. And my memories aren't tied to a bed room so it's not like I'll be leaving everything behind. Some time ago I played a game of Literati with Azure and was inspired to write a short story with the first couple of words we made. It wasn't until today that I actually sat down to write it, heh. Many Thanks to Azure for inspiration. Dedicated to Akamaru for making him disappointed with my absence in his cool thread in the Anthology. (The bolded words are the ones from the Literati game. Please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes and any kind of general crappiness; I didn't make as big of an effort with making it decent, as with my recent RPG posts. Which might be a welcome change, who knows O.o

A pirate band of swishy rouges (they call themselves The Swoosh Triad) under the command of Ed Dweeb had just captured their no1 nemesis and Captain Dweeb was giving said nemesis a steely glare (the one he’d put on when he was crosser than cross). It was said that the glare could scorch the very soul in even the bravest of pirates.

“Arrr” he finally growled “Tis a shame you’ve sworn to be mah mortal combattant, elst you could’ve been a mighty fine asset to this here crew”

Snickers were heard here and there in the gathered group but were soon silenced at the barks from their captive scanning them with sharp eyes.

“Ay, laugh all ye want but this here ass is connected to a pair of spangly knuckles that’ll dish out a good whooping when I get my hands on ya and that’s all some of ya’lls’ asses will get for a good two weeks, mark mah words!”

Dweeb roared with laughter and bent down to stroke a strand of hair out of the angered woman’s face. It sure was hard to keep up the charade when you were dealing with a face contorted with indignant rage and pout of a 3-year old.

“Now, now mah lovely Grace. How’s about we start over and try to get on a good footing with each other again, eh?”

She snorted and stuck her nose in the air defiantly to further drive home the point of her steadfastness. They’d fought many battles in the 8 years she’d been the chef of his band and she only got more confident in her stubbornness with each year. The display didn’t amuse Dweeb, however, his frown returning slowly.

“I do not take abuse on one’s own team lightly and this here mess will be sorted out, the easy way or the way where I dangle ye over the water and have the sharks teach you some table manners.”

“Hey, I don’t see why I’m the one in the wrong here, especially since my manners ain’t got nothing on that gargoyle Slawb! Why’s it me getting the shouting at?”

“You shoved broccoli stems up his nose and stuffed his mouth with peas!”

“Aye, you know, he looked a whole sight better when that ghastly excuse for a moustache couldn’t be seen and it sure was a blessing to see peas out of his mouth instead of that annoying tripe he always vomits in my galley. I say he should apologise for making me do it and the rest of the crew should thank me for putting him in his place!”

She nodded resolutely and resumed her scans of the crew members to note who dared give her lip. Dweeb sighed and rubbed his temple, rather tired of wasting precious time on trivial matters.

“Arrr, listen to me missy. The crew’s nigh on starving so what’ll it take to get that sunshine smile beaming again?”

Grace peered at him with one eye while considering her terms. Everyone held their breath; the Captain being so gratuitous with unruly subordinates was unheard of before now. Giving such leeway to that woman sure didn’t bode well.

“I want that scum to beg for my forgiveness” she nodded to Slawb “and all the others should praise me for it along with my mere presence as it blesses them more than Heaven could ever hope to.” A smug grin spread over her lips when she was finished. The captain simply shook his head.

“Slawb, you heard her.”

“I beg your pardon?!” Slawb brawled.

“There you go, Miss Grace.” Dweeb quickly intercepted before any further protesting were issued and turned to the crew. “The rest of you all say ‘Thank you’ on the count of three. 1,2,3 --“

“Thank you”, they all murmured unenthusiastically. Grace’s jaw dropped, too dumbstruck to begin objecting at what she thought was a grave injustice being done to her.

“Ah, that’s that done. Return to your posts and somebody release the lasso from Miss Grace. I’m sure it can be of better use than to restrain her.”

The Captain turned on his heel and wandered back to his quarters through the scattering crowd, stroking his beard satisfactory. Though the problem with future scuffs still weighed on his mind. Some more permanent action had to be taken; farces like this had no place on his ship. Life on sea was already rough; he didn’t want to play baby sitter and mediate in nonsensical squabbles. He’d much rather play a quiet game of boule.

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